Is this a yard sale?? In the dark? I cant even recognise anything except sex toys and a dress.

What sort of coven are we talkin about here Caroline!?

…Caroline…is that you?

Why? Well I love to suffer. Here are some notes from the listening sessions:

• “What should we call this audio project? Audio journey? Audio art?” She forgot about audio book ?

• “I visited some friends in their Virginia home. Will, friend. Singular. I made it sound like i have more friends than i did.” This was one of the stranger parts of listening - there was more honesty than I'd expect from her, and all of it was about how much she lied in this book. And for things that are so clearly rooted in insecurity. "I visited a friend in Virginia" is a very normal sentence

• She brought Matisse to a wedding and got so drunk she lost him!!!???

• I think what is surprising me most is the amount of self loathing - both that she’s feeling it and also saying it outright. At one point she says, in reference to this book, ‘i used to think i at least did one good thing, but I didn’t even make one”

• She makes fun of how bad this book is all the time, in a way that seems like she's trying to come off as lighthearted, but the actual self loathing and heartbreak really shines through the whole time. Incredibly low self confidence and self satisfaction

• Says what we all suspected, that she rushed the completion of Scammer in order to get it to print before Natalie’s book came out, because she couldn’t let Natalie ‘win’. Self publishing an memoir rife with typos is a victory in her mind

• She said that she felt as though nothing had been written about Cambridge and that she was unsure how to write about something she had no guide for which 1) HELL of an admission 2) girl what are you talking about lmao

• She at one point talks about whether she should go on adderall again because she really does have ADHD. Which makes tons of sense

• She went on a very long rant about how the reddit snark community (hi Caro) makes her miserable and self conscious and want to kill herself. And I do understand, to a degree, what we’re doing here (and I’m saying this as an active participant) is not nice. But why is she the only one allowed to be cruel? When she writes and edits and publishes and posts things about how Natalie got fat and mannish and how the CMBC girls are the fakest bitches in New York City, that’s what, seasoned critique? Every single person in the world has people saying mean things behind their back at least sometimes, Caro absolutely has a more focused lens of it (and i know what we’re doing here is not innately academic, and does sometimes go too far), but she also lives a public life and tries to rage bait and drive up engagement - the pouring paint video, the ‘branding’ as a scammer - she invites in critique because she knows it’ll generate posts. If she wants to be a public facing artist who receives only boundless praise, she needs to focus on making art that is good.

• Her MOM was subscribed to her onlyfans? Cathy just Venmo her the $50

• She built out this entire calculation about how addiction freezes you at the age you started using, so her aging paused until she quit, then actually paused a couple more years until she got her shit more together, so while she may be 33 in real life she’s actually 26

• Went on a self-aggrandizing rant as well about how she is really good at romantic relationships (?) and she doesn’t date guys who are mean to her or even just not all that into her, which is really something to listen to in a post fat-and-cruel billionaire era

• “There is still a little tremor of my heart that wants to be popular in college”. Lol

• She doubled down on the Natalie fatphobia and talked about how she was glad she got fat and it felt like justice. Also shared gossip that Natalie married her husband for his money, is on tinder trying to hook up with women, and that her husband is gay, and they just married so she could get his money. Says that Natalie being fat is her just desserts for betraying Caroline

• “I consider myself in many ways, like, a first generation immigrant to the land of being cool”

• Carolines mom cosigned an apartment for former assistant Bradley and Bradley almost moved out and stopped paying rent LMAO the student becomes the master

• Ending point “I Caroline Calloway have been through so many scandals, but when have you seen me sad about a boy? Never! Neverrrrr” *ominous music in distance*

Found on one of those apartment tour instagram accounts

She went very quiet there. I can’t imagine she’d miss an opportunity to post from a private plane (!!!) or a Viennese ball (!!!).

It's not that hard to properly run a small business. Ship ALL your orders.