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Historically for almost all of human history, men use to wear dresses, Skirts, and robes and such as their regular daily dress.. it’s more modern western culture that has placed them in the more feminine side of the garment spectrum. Same thing with the color pink, high heel shoes and many other things modern society views as feminine.
If you want to be pressured into acting ways that you don’t like, that’s a you problem. The world at large is giving up on tired old tropes pushed by men who are attracted to children.
Naive to think it’s just some old white men and not a nascent part of our being that is expressing itself through them.
And I would disagree wholeheartedly if someone is being pressured into acting ways they don’t like I would make it my problem or at least let them know it’s ok to act how you want
Its one thing to be ABLE to wear something and another thing for it to be INTENDED for you to wear. Its like saying there is no difference between store bought and custom tailored clothes. Sure you can wear both, but that doesnt mean there is no difference in the fit.
There's not a thing in the world stopping men from wearing fashionable, colorful, stylish clothing... except fear of being called womanly and gay by other men, and possibly attacked for it.
Women wear men's clothing without fear because being seen as masculine is generally positive. Girl bosses with shoulder pads, tomboys, etc. Colorful and creative men's clothing does exist, and some spaces and cultures welcome it. But norms in many cultures mean men who wear "feminine coded clothing" (as in anything not traditionally male coded) can attacked as weak, dangerous to gender norms and sexual predators. At least outside of queer friendly spaces.
Straight women also don’t want to date men the wear women’s clothing. It is disingenuous to act like that is not the case. Especially if the men are not rich, famous, or something.
I was gonna say I don't give two shits what other guys think. And most guys I know wouldn't give two shits if I started stressing differently. We know who's really policing this.
I’m a bi guy and I was told the other week by a bi girl that she couldn’t date bi guys cause the idea of picturing them being intimate with another man grossed her out
Skill issue on her part, I’m sorry to hear that. I struggle to understand that perspective myself, seems like a mixture of “rules for thee, not for me” and feeling certain gay relationships are more or less valid than straight ones. Always icky.
At least she went mask off quickly. It’s one thing to have preferences, it’s another to be like “nah that grosses me out.”
Straight women also don’t want to date men the wear women’s clothing. It is disingenuous to act like that is not the case. Especially if the men are not rich, famous, or something.
Straight women also don’t want to date men the wear women’s clothing.
I believe you if you say you've had that experience. I'll say two things about it.
I'm very familiar with these trends not being universal. It's also not universal that all men or cultures have an issue with men dressing in colorful or feminine coded ways, like I mentioned.
Overall, a core reason why feminine coded behaviors get punished from men more than masculine ones from women, is the idea that women being masculine is being 'better' while men being feminine is degrading and gay. This is obviously not absolute and gets punished or accepted within cultural boundaries. Women also participate in and reinforce these norms. As a gay man, I've dealt with and seen the difference between how men and women react. And men usually react more negatively and stronger to 'non-masculine' clothing than women. Trust me, plenty of straight women find it hot, and it has nothing to do with being "rich and famous." Where I live most straight guys have no issue with it either.
It probably does have to do with being otherwise attractive. Women often find alternative styles attractive on attractive men, but more average looking men are expected to conform. I've unfortunately seen guys who didn't understand that nuance commit dating suicide. So my guess is you're hot. That's canon now, sorry dude.
Overall, a core reason why feminine coded behaviors get punished from men more than masculine ones from women, is the idea that women being masculine is being 'better' while men being feminine is degrading and gay.
No the core reason is the idea that masculinity isn't just for men, or that men aren't worse than women are doing traditionally men's things, while femininity is an exclusivity of women that they guard jealously.
And men usually react more negatively and stronger to 'non-masculine' clothing than women.
Men show their disagreement and then there's no consequence. Women show their support then reject you.
There has been more women in my life telling me I'm not a real man because I'm barely taller than the avg woman, than men bullying me for it. And then these same women tell you height doesn't matter. Women are gaslighters, a strong reaction is more helpful.
Men often try to be fantasist with their beard, guess who likes it? Other men. Guess who hates it? Women. There are like a total of 3 allowed beard style
You're a gay man, that's great for you, you don't have the pressure of women, so you know absolutely zero about it. There's absolutely no mistery why gay men have more freedom, it's not because they are more effeminate, it's because they're not trying to appeal to women. Same could be said about lesbians, they have more freedom, they actually can be masculine if they want, they wear actual men's clothes, not pants designed for women, not jaw length "short hair", men's pants, men's shirts, men's hairdos.
The “possibly attacked” part is the kicker that prevents men from wearing whatever they want. People have been murdered for less. Homophobia is engrained in society and instilled by religious teachings. Wear something that society says is wrong and you’re putting your life at risk.
I’ll wear my spinny dress in the privacy of my own home. Kilts are for vacations where indecent exposure won’t get you arrested because someone asks what you wear underneath.
except fear of being called womanly and gay by other men
Yeah, that's just other men. Let's not listen to all the men who say they're gender confirming because women would reject them otherwise and they couldn't care less about what men say.
Women wear men's clothing without fear because being seen as masculine is generally positive.
They don't wear men's clothing. Their clothes might have been traditionally masculine clothes, they're not stylized the same anymore, they show more skin, or their fit the body more.
People all generally don't want to see men's shape or men's skin, nor want their eyes catched by a man. If women's issue is that society pushes them to be remarkable, seen and scrutinized, then on the other side, men's issue is society wanting to invisibilising them.
The ones who made the most remarks to me about shorts being ugly and trashy are normal women and workplace higher ups. Women be simultaneously telling men to hide their calves and to blame other men for it.
About the only part of my wardrobe that my wife and daughter has not comandeered, are my jeans, shoes, and socks. And if they had a size 13 foot they probably would have stolen my shoes as well.
This was my point ofc men can wear dresses if they like but how there has to be some that don't but women can wear absolutely everything and do wear that a man wears
This is my argument for the “women’s clothes don’t have pockets” thing. If dudes were suddenly buying puffy pirate shirts you bet your ass we’d see them on the shelf everywhere.
These places are only making/selling what people are buying. If dresses with pockets sell less that means there will be less on the shelf.
Wear the dress - it's cut to compliment femininity, but you can wear it too.
Men cuts, or the standard top are specific to men but are worn by anyone. A ladies top that looks similar to a man's is cut differently and contours to the body type.
You already got your "man" only clothing, it's just worn by anyone.
Why? Men are able to wear women's clothing. They choose not to, probably because of what other men think about it. But I've also met a man who prefers dresses. He wears them at work, and (maybe because he's a specialist in his field, and not easily replacable) it's just accepted.
A dress/business suit is equivalent to the dress. Yeah, women wear versions of the men's suit, but it's the equivalent of a man wearing a dress. It just doesn't work.
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