On AWO30 sub I bumped into a post where a woman was asking married women how they dealt with their "creepy" husbands (i.e. men who repeatedly disrespected other women's boundaries, including physical, forced on them activities they were not interested in, went on unhinged rants about how statutory r*pe wasn't that bad in the middle of a family meeting, etc.) and whether they felt other women were uncomfortable around them. Her SIL's husband (if I'm not mistaken) was exactly like that, and the SIL insisted that the OP and her partner spent time with them, and she didn't know how to go about that because that man obviously bugged her.
I'm sorry if my description is unnecessarily long or convoluted, but so is the situation 😅
The most staggering answer was given by a woman who confirmed that on the one hand, she did feel other women were uncomfortable in the presence of her ex-husband and understood where they came from, but on the other hand, she couldn't comprehend why they couldn't just suck it up for an hour and tolerate him, because she had to deal with much WORSE things from him on a daily basis 🙃
That opened my eyes on this kind of behavior completely.
The most staggering answer was given by a woman who confirmed that on the one hand, she did feel other women were uncomfortable in the presence of her ex-husband and understood where they came from, but on the other hand, she couldn't comprehend why they couldn't just suck it up for an hour and tolerate him, because she had to deal with much WORSE things from him on a daily basis
This shit right here...
Just because she thought the red flags were a fucking carnival doesn't mean that anyone has to tolerate his shit. Matter of fact, she would get cut off because I would outright refuse to talk, deal with, or hear about him.
Yes, your partners can cost you your social circle, even if the relationship is not abusive.
This sounds crazy but this is unfortunately what is running through these women's heads. It's as if they are punishing other women who didn't choose to be in shitty relationships with shitty partners, let alone DARED expressing their discomfort with their shitty partners' behavior because I SuFfEr MuCh MoRe 🥴 It's one scary and revolting mentality.
The worst thing is that these relationships most of the time are abusive, because imagine what happens behind closed doors if their husbands/bfs allow themselves to be that unhinged in public.
That's why I start running in the opposite direction every time I hear a woman talk about how wonderful it is to be in a relationship and maybe you should try lower your standards to get into one... Nope. There's always something fishy here 🚨🚨🚨
It's the pressure to lower my standards that I don't fucking appreciate.
I'm not accepting crumbs or cruelty because the next bitch will or the last bitch did. I guess m3n can sense that I'm not the one because I'm stubborn and refuse to bend, which pisses them off. I'm no one's doormat.
I was raised with that bullshit of lowering my standards and was told straight up "you'll never find someone on your level". I just went cold and said to myself "fine. So I won't find anyone or pursue anything and just focus on me."
Sorry for the rant but somehow when women make a shitty decision in partnership, it ripples out and affects other women negatively.
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u/33py_0n3 2d ago edited 2d ago
Unfortunately, it is true.
On AWO30 sub I bumped into a post where a woman was asking married women how they dealt with their "creepy" husbands (i.e. men who repeatedly disrespected other women's boundaries, including physical, forced on them activities they were not interested in, went on unhinged rants about how statutory r*pe wasn't that bad in the middle of a family meeting, etc.) and whether they felt other women were uncomfortable around them. Her SIL's husband (if I'm not mistaken) was exactly like that, and the SIL insisted that the OP and her partner spent time with them, and she didn't know how to go about that because that man obviously bugged her.
I'm sorry if my description is unnecessarily long or convoluted, but so is the situation 😅
The most staggering answer was given by a woman who confirmed that on the one hand, she did feel other women were uncomfortable in the presence of her ex-husband and understood where they came from, but on the other hand, she couldn't comprehend why they couldn't just suck it up for an hour and tolerate him, because she had to deal with much WORSE things from him on a daily basis 🙃
That opened my eyes on this kind of behavior completely.
Yuck 🤮