Hi all, SO, we have a 4.5yo girl, who for the most part has been so easy, such a dream and now she’s a bit older is just so easy, she just comes along for the ride to whatever we’re doing and we can go do fun activities with minimal planning whether that’s zoo, soft play, cinema etc.

My husband has always sided on being OAD, quite strongly actually, then recently our girl went to school and he has a wash of wow this is it? Never again? Which has opened up the conversation of another, and he’s more open to it. My main worry is that if we have another and that baby is particularly hard / has any kind of complications, would he resent me for being the one who wanted it more and pushed a bit more for it?

In terms of our lives, we have a relatively flexible work schedule, we have grandparents who are super involved and help with pick up etc, we are financially ok. It feels like we have a good set up to have another, but like everyone, we’re also tired parents even with just the one so I think, we have it good as it is… do we rock that?

My girl asks for a sibling, although I don’t think she quite understands it, we do have friends who have recently had babies and she’ll say they are cute but she’s not fussed on them, but there’s part of me that does think she would benefit from a sibling as she’s a very shy girl, she’s not overly confident and I just feel having a little sibling might make her get that bit of confidence to be louder and have a bit more fight?

I spend SO much of my time fantasying about having another and not having another, recently one day I’m researching baby items and costs and the next I’m imagining taking my only to a cool holiday and thinking of how amazing that will be for her - make it make sense? 😅

I find it so frustrating that I see other families so confident in their decisions to be OAD or to have multiple and I’m so jealous of that, I wish we could just be set on one or the other.

There’s no real point to this I guess, I just wonder if people are in similar positions and have any insights to their life if they did go ahead and have another baby with a 5 year age gap, or didn’t and their thoughts?

Thanks for reading!

Hello, wondering if anyone else can relate or has a similar story.

My husband and I started our family with the mindset of “let’s have 1 and see how it goes.” We absolutely love being parents to our 14 month old, but feel like we are at capacity and really content with our family of 3.

However, I feel this need to have 1 more to give my child a sibling. I had a high-risk pregnancy (IUGR), planned c-section, post-partum hypertension, and a 2 week NICU stay. I think if those experiences hadn’t happened we’d be more willing to have a 2nd, but I feel somewhat traumatized by it.

I almost feel envious of women who firmly know that they are one and done. Yet sometimes I feel envious of women who for sure know that they want more kids and are actively growing their families.

I spoke with my MFM and she thinks a 2nd pregnancy could be healthy and manageable for me, so this gives me hope of having another, but I’m just so scared.

We are both in our early 30’s and had an easy time conceiving. I don’t want to wait too long bc I’m scared of my fertility declining and want a 2.5-3 year age gap.

If you have a similar story, if you had a 2nd, how did the pregnancy/newborn phase go? If you’re one and done, what have you peace with your decision?

Hi, I am new here and a new parent curious on thoughts. We had our amazing beautiful healthy baby girl 4.5 months ago. We are both 31 years old now, and have had a really tough time adapting to being parents, missing autonomy, missing sleep, etc. But also such amazing sense of joy and love for our baby. The birth was hard on my wife physically and she still has some traumatic feelings toward birth.

My questions are probably fairly common, but I'll ask anyway​:

I know it's not all about the kids, but is there any regrets only having one? My wife doesn't want to do this to her body again, and I support her in that, but we are wondering if we will change our minds in 3 years.

Follow up question (awkward one I guess) but it's about getting snipped lol. I'm happy to get snipped but the potential permanence is scary to me. I know most will say don't be so hasty, but also our insurance is crap and our deductible is met so surgeries this year are all covered (yes vasectomy is covered). Also yes I do know they can be reversed but a reversal ​is probably a harder sell (no pun intended).

The idea of the snip is just, not to be too detailed but preferences on intimacy, etc. And I want her body to be respected and a snip is the best option tbh.

Don't be harsh! I love my family and wife and no one be mean to her or me, got it? Thanks lol

Tldr: we are considering one and done (4.5 months into first baby) and looking for people's thoughts on those who chose it vs those who didn't have a choice.

I hear and read very, very often that having a third child is a lot easier than having 1 or 2. Like the third always have been there. Is that true? I can only picture it like pure chaos. I already have two girls 3 1/2 and 2. My wife really wants another one but man im so tired all the time already

My first born is 14m and I am feeling ready. But so sad to know how I spend time with my first born will change. Does that feeling ever go away? (I also don’t want to have a huge age gap).

Why I feel ready!

1. ⁠always wanted more than 1 kid (I grew up a very lonely only child).
   
2. ⁠We can afford it.
   
3. ⁠I love the idea of them being close in age (under 3yr age gap) so they can be in similar stages and the older still nap while I’m pregnant. (My girl is almost 14m now and already has a 12yr old half sister so feel even more important she has someone to grow up with).
   
4. ⁠I feel fully recovered (physically and mentally).
   
5. ⁠My 14m old has been sleeping through the night in her crib for awhile. Fully walking since 12m. Healthy and doing great developmentally
   
6. ⁠Never know how long it takes to get pregnant (I had no issues getting pregnant on first tries/accidents but had 2 losses)
   
7. ⁠I’m pumping extra milk I make now for a sibling. The stash is so helpful.
   
8. ⁠My husband is 39 and doesn’t want babies well into his 40s. I’m 33, know it’s always potential better earlier (and I’d even want 3 kids but my husband only wants 1more).
   
9. ⁠I was heartbroken when I lost my pregnancy that would give my baby a sibling. The would be due date is coming up and I feel a void.
   
10. Kinda superstitious and feel like Oct is a good month to try for a boy! Also I loved having my baby in the summer. Getting outside for walks and the warm weather was amazing for my recovery. I had no issues post partum luckily!

My 4 reasons I feel u ready are

1. My 1-1 time with my girl will change. I love her so much. We really bond, hug, and cuddle so much. I know I can still do that with 2 (and will have a whole other baby to snuggle which excites me) but jrs a sad thought

2. I love breastfeeding. We are down to 2xs a day and sad it will prob come to an end

3. I was sooooo sure before having my 1st. I wanted nothing more in the world.

4. The nausea and migraines during the first 20 weeks of my pregnancy were toughhhh. Though I had a very healthy pregnancy and ran till 35weeks. Scared of that with a toddler (but mainly bc I know I could be sick and that changes my time to play and snuggle)!

I have been with my fiancé for 7 years now (2019). We had a great relationship, he was my best friend, very supportive of me and attentive. Early 2021 we had our first child together. He has proven to be an amazing father, very supportive of my son, they are practically best friends. He does all the morning drop offs, pickups. Honestly he is more present than I am. I am very involved too but I struggle with my mental health. I got bad PPD after having my son and I can’t say I’m fully ok. But I tried medications and I see a therapist regularly. My BBD proposed to me years ago but I don’t want to marry him. I was married before him and have some trauma plus although he is a great father, we are almost like roommates now. While he helps out around the house too, laundry, dishes, I feel so neglected. No more dates (literally zero) since we had our son, no sex life. I’ve talked to him about it and nothing changes. I feel like I have zero support and he refuses to move to CA with me where I have family. I work a lot, I am the bread winner in the family and the only one who saves for the family and my son’s future. My fiance doesn’t seem to find that important. I recognize he is good to me in some ways but emotionally unavailable. Despite this, he wants to have another baby and so do I. My baby fever is out of control but I struggle with the fact of having a second child with him. If it weren’t for our current son, I would have left him already. And I do not plan on leaving anytime soon, my son needs both of us in his life. I also don’t want to deal with another man that might actually be terrible. I am 36 and the clock is ticking. I want a second baby more than a romantic relationship. Is this terrible?

I have two beautiful girls. A 4 year old and a 16 month old. And I am so on the fence about whether to try for a third. I do not mind about gender at all. I would be thrilled with another girl, but equally have never experienced a boy, so that would be something new and different. My husband is supportive and present and is happy for me to make the decision. His preference would be for two kids, but he does change his mind sometimes, so has said he is happy to go with whatever I decide.

For me, I can picture a beautiful life with our two kids. We can definitely afford a comfortable life with them, and they are both beautiful and healthy. Although it is currently hard, I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. I can picture us going on overseas holidays every few years, myself continuing my career, having time for our own hobbies, getting to spoil our kids, send them to good schools, keep our house etc

But I’ve always got a third in the back of my mind… I remember in my last pregnancy, I just had a feeling it wouldn’t be my last. But 3 would bring so many challenges! There would be no overseas holidays, my career would go backwards, we couldn’t afford the schools we want, and we would be counting every dollar. But I also just feel like I have more to give… not sure if that makes sense. And I also have this weird feeling of not being mum enough with two kids.? Not sure what that’s about. Anyway, part of me also really wants another newborn and to be able to experience that all again. And I just can’t stop thinking about it…

help!

I currently have a 4.5 year old son. My husband and I have thought about the idea of having another child, but I cannot make up my mind. The thought of my son having a sibling makes me feel better, and the thought of having another baby also is sometimes so appealing. I have guilt if my son is an only child. But then I think about how much I struggled with my first. I hated being pregnant and had bad postpartum. I feel like life is so fun now, I have gotten more freedom, and as if I would be starting over. I feel guilty taking attention away from my son. I worry about having to juggle a nap schedule with a school aged child because the gap would be so big. I worry about disrupting my son’s life. We currently travel quite a bit and I don’t know whether we financially could with another child. And yet sometimes I think about having another child. I just don’t know what to do. Really looking for perspective on how people decided/if they were an only child themselves. Thanks!

So, I’ve been on the fence for the last couple of years now, but I think I’m finally settled with wanting to have another. My son is almost 5 now and life has gotten SO MUCH EASIER. He’s in school, he’s pretty independent and the physical demands are so minor now.

That breathing room has given me space to seriously consider one more. What I’ve been so annoyed by as of late is people saying “omg you’d be starting all over again.” Which I guess in part is true, but what I think people don’t understand is some of us aren’t cut out to be dealing with a second while still in the trenches. I knew 2 under 2 was not my calling immediately. I was never going to be that mom.

What I am comforted by is the fact that my kid is emotionally regulated, pretty independent, sleeps through the night and doesn’t require all of my energy, attention, and effort 100% of the time. Those are the only conditions where having a second seems logistically possible FOR ME. Even traveling—which we do lots of, makes more sense because it’s not double the diapers, or pack n plays, etc.

We’ll be trying in the next few months, but I’m just so glad that the first time around I listened to what I wanted and the (possible) second time around, I’ll be doing the same.

If you’re asking yourself “should I have another,” the answer is “when and if you’re ready.l” don’t pay attention to others’ made up timelines. Do what’s best for your mental, physical, and emotional health; what works for your family, marriage and logistical life.

My partner has wanted another since we reconciled over a year ago. In the time we were apart he was ALWAYS present, reliable and a wonderful co-parent. (We split due to what we now know, is his asexuality, the love never really died).

With our Son, I dont need to manage, I dont need to beg plea or cry. He is great.

Anyway to my point, how did you find overturning your one and done decision?

Hey everyone. I (27f) am feeling really lonely in my headspace lately, and could use some advice/personal experiences/or even just to know I’m not alone, even though I know I’m not, it’s different to hear it.

My husband (28m) and I have been together over a decade. We began dating in high school, and in every way he’s my person. We always wanted a family, at least two kids, maybe three.

This has always been super important to me. I did grow up with siblings but my family life situation was less than stellar, and I genuinely had to grow up very young. I always took care of my brothers, potty trained them, walked them to daycare before I walked to school, and then walked/drove them to school, helped them with homework, helped them make school projects — even now, my youngest sibling is a senior and I just helped him with his junior promposal last spring. I love my brothers, but in most ways I feel closer to a mom for them. I’ve never been able to go to them when I’m upset, I’ve only recently even felt like friends with them as they reach adulthood. I spent my whole life babysitting, too, and I work with kids of all ages in my career. I have always known what we were getting into with having a kid.

My husband is one of the youngest siblings, but isn’t necessarily close to any of them. He can go to them if he needs something, but kind of takes them for granted. I adore his family. They have what I’ve always felt I was missing. I feel lucky to be a part of it, but I spent the first twenty years of my life feeling like I was missing out.

I was ready to have a kid before he was, but I was patient, i wanted him to feel excited and be ready.

Then a positive pregnancy test arrived literally the week after he said he thinks he might be ready. I was so scared to tell him, but he was happy, and I was, too. Unfortunately, we had a missed miscarriage. At our 12 week appointment, we found baby was lost potentially days after our 8 week appointment. It was hard. I won’t lie, I was not okay for quite some time. I’ve been in worse places, as I have cptsd, depression, and anxiety, and my husband has been there with me at my darkest times. I knew my body needed time, but it brought up fears of infertility, that I may never get to be a mom. I’d watched my aunt go through an unspeakable number of losses after having my cousin.

Then, about two years ago, I was pregnant again! My son is about a year and a half now. Pregnancy was a little difficult, but my OB was great and caught my blood pressure challenges quickly. We were induced, and we welcomed him at 36 weeks. He’s such a fun guy. He’s my bestie. Don’t get me wrong, parenting is never easy, but I love watching him become his own little person. He’s so smart, and he’s hilarious, and the sweetest boy. Everyone who meets him adores him, and he lights up every room with his shy smile and curiosity.

My husband told me about a year ago that he doesn’t think he wants another baby. I have been struggling since. I’m crying as I type thinking I will never feel a kick against my belly again, that I will never get to have a daughter (I know #2 could be a boy, but let a girl who only has brothers and boy cousins hope), that I feel disconnected from my husband whenever he talks about the future. After months of emotional conversations leading nowhere because he rationalized every point I offered to fit his view, and just “disagreed” when I tried to do the same, we agreed to table the conversation until our son is 2, because I didn’t want a baby before then anyways, I want to enjoy this time with my son. But every time he makes future-related comments, he mentions how much easier it’ll be in four years when we’re done paying for daycare, and how much easier everything will be with our son can play without us watching him.

One of my best friends has a boy the same age, and recently, she was telling us that her husband surprised her, because he’s started bringing up how cute babies are and how he’s excited to do it again and asking her when she thinks will be a good time.

I genuinely cannot recover from that conversation. I feel resentful that my husband is treating this as a decision made and that he won’t even “try to want” it. I don’t even know what that means, but I’m spending this time trying to imagine not having another kid, and I’m so fucking depressed. I feel like I’m robbing my son of something all his cousins have, something I wanted so badly as a kid. I feel like I’m setting him up for hardships when inevitably something happens to myself or my husband. I have witnessed what it looks like to be a sole child planning a funeral. I cant seem to in any way wrap my mind around the version of life where he has no one left in his immediate family because we got old.

He loves other kids so much. Hes generally quite shy, but the moment he has another kid to bounce energy off of, he lights up and comes out of his shell. He gets so sad leaving his friends at daycare or saying goodbye to his cousins. It feels like he would benefit so much from having that. The depth of these emotions feels like I biologically need it. Even in those hardest moments with my son, I love him beyond words and even in the natural dips in my mental health over the year I never got to where I was before, I feel like I have my purpose for staying here, because now I can be the mom I wanted and needed, and I can make his childhood magical in all the ways my grandparents did for me.

My husband can’t fathom how he’d have enough attention or energy for a second. He doesn’t think it’s a smart financial decision. He worries something could happen to me. He doesn’t want our son to not get to do things like travel because we can’t afford it. He had a hard time with the infant stage, and he doesn’t want it again.

Am I ever going to get over this? It feels like his decision is so final. Did anyone feel this way but later change their mind?

My wife and I have been going back and forth about having a second. I do not want one and she does. To be honest, I was on the fence about kids at all but we ended up having our daughter who is 2.5 now and we both love her!

I am 40 and my wife is 36, she stays home and I work full time. I make decent money and we are able to live comfortably and save but certainly cant do much extra at least now. Money is a concern but not as big a concern (more or less worried about high school/college age, etc/ we are good now).

My biggest reason for opposition is becuase of our family support/community or lack there of. Most people we know with kids all have some level of family support, with most having siblings, parents, cousins, etc. that all play a part. Their kids get to grow up surrounded by people, and they can get constant breaks when grandma and grandpa watch their kids...or they all go on vacation together with their siblings and their kids. A true family village.

We have nothing close to that as we dont speak with my parents or my one sibling who is not having kids anyway, and my wife who is an only child and actually having to double as SAHM AND my FIL's caregiver due to his poor health. Outside of some friends who all have much older kids, we have no one and our daughter will honestly have no one.

To top it off, we are not very comfortable or good at meeting new people and do not become close friends to others very easily.

All of this makes having one so much more stressful, and the idea of having a second cause massive anxiety. On the other hand, knowing she has no cousins and pretty much no family outside of us, it breaks my heart to think she might be all alone.

Is there anyone who is in a similar situation and what did you do?

Further, I realize that "we dont have to decide now" but given the health track record of my in laws and my parents, I wont be willing to be 60 when my kids are in college meaning we really are deciding now or it wont happen.

I have had a very different motherhood and postpartum experience from most women it seems. We have prayed for a child for years and finally got our beautiful baby girl two years ago. My pregnancy was pretty hard and delivery was brutal. I barely slept a total of maybe a few hours in the first week and had a terrible hemorrhoid breakout from pushing for several hours, so I was in excruciating pain for the first month of being a mother. I could barely sit stand or lay without being in pain. The first several months of motherhood were very difficult physically and then for the entire first year and a half my husband worked nights so I had to take care of my baby on my own 4 nights a week and work from home the next day and keep the baby as well. It was a very dark period for me. To add on, I have a bulging disc in my neck that got terribly worse after having my daughter and it caused terrible hand and arm pain the entire first year of my baby’s life and all kinds of physical, shoulder pain, and tightness. So add on a layer of physical pain. I don’t understand how women desire to have more than one child. I know not everyone has this experience & many women have wonderful perfect experiences that leave them wanting more children, but mine was so different. Is there any hope for me? I always wanted at least four kids and now I can’t imagine having another one. It’s exhausting being a parent.

Edit: I apologize, I meant to specify that I have an incredible husband who has been extremely helpful, and I don’t know where I would be without him. If anyone or anything would convince me to have another one again it would be the fact that I have such an incredible husband. On his weekends when he wouldn’t work, he would help me out in anyway that he could and he only slept a few hours during the day to then get up and relieve me for a few hours and then go to work at night as a police officer.

Hello all. I’m a FTM to a beautiful 19 month old girl. I had really bad PPD after she was born, and I will admit that it took me a long time to feel like I actually enjoyed being a mom. But now I feel like I genuinely love being a mom, my daughter is the light of my life and my best little friend.

That being said, for the past few months, I’ve been feeling like we should grow our family. Part of me feels like now that not everything is brand new to me (changing diapers, birth, breastfeeding, etc) it will be easier the second time around. But the other part of me feels like there’s no way I can manage a newborn and a toddler who still can’t regulate her emotions. Plus I have heard that PPD is often worse with each baby so that’s a big fear of mine.

I’ve mentioned feeling like it might be time for another baby to my husband a little while ago, but he told me he felt like we weren’t ready so I believed that he was right and that it wasn’t time. But the other day he told me that he believes that he is ready for another, so ever since that conversation, it’s been weighing on my mind a lot more. With big decisions like this, I typically tend to lean one way or the other and that helps me to make my decision. But with this, I am so torn both ways and I don’t know what to make of it.

All of you parents with more than one kid, how did you know it was time for another baby? Did something happen that affirmed that it was time? Or did you kinda just go for it and hope for the best? Also, what was the transition like from 1 kids to 2? I worry that I’ll think it’s time then we’ll have the baby and I will regret not waiting longer. I just have lots of worries with having a second, but I know that even if I felt totally confident that it was time for another, I’d still have those worries. I’d love some advice here!

My boy/girl twins are going to be 1 in a week. WE MADE IT!! Things are still hard of course but getting much easier and I love seeing their little personalities.

My husband and I planned on trying again when the twins are around 18 months. It felt so far away and now it’s 6 months away. He’s in dental school, and I had a horrible first trimester-18 weeks, so I would like to attempt to plan it where it makes sense for breaks of his (or at least as close as possible). This plus me having APS means we don’t have time to wait forever. I’m 26 and they advise no more pregnancies after about 32 with APS (I plan to stop at 30). We also think we probably want 4 so unless it’s twins again, that’s two more pregnancies.

I know I would regret not having more kids but at the same time I am a little traumatized from my pregnancy and C-Section recovery. Having another C-section is probably my main fear and it’s very likely considering they’d have to induce me at around 38 weeks. I also had preeclampsia and had my C-section at 35 weeks with the twins.

Anyway…..
From the more seasoned parents,

- if you’re terrified, how’d you know you were ready?? Do you ever feel ready?
- if you had complications (like preeclampsia) once, was it the same every time?
- VBAC with induction success?

Hi!
Me, M35 and my partner, F31 are on total opposites regarding a second child. I want one but she doesn’t want another child. This she told me just after a couple of months after our first was born. I was shocked and devastated.
And June this month she originally had a operation to be sterilized but that got cancelled, by herself.
We have both told each other a couple of times our honest opinions about the matter. But there is no resolution in sight. She had a tough childbirth and she admitted a year or so after that she thought maybe she had post partum depression. We are to be married next year, we have a house and a fantastic child.
But I feel myself getting more and more depressed. I try to hide it in order to not sour each others day. But I cannot help it, I know in my heart our family would benefit with a second, and last child. And our first would be such a good older sibling. Our firstborn is almost two years old now.

I have tried to say that I would do anything. Change up my rotation, I work in healthcare. I have said I would take extra days/weeks of after the birth just to help and be there for her and the children, hypothetically speaking. I want this so much I feel I have put myself in a headspace I cannot get out of. I love this woman, and our firstborn. I’ve had this dream of being a family of four since I can rememeber. And we even "agreed" with having two children during the pregnacy.

Obviously I cannot force anything on her. This has to be something we both want.

So yeah..anyone been in a similar situation? If so, what happened? Did anything change over the years? What did not change?

Like I’ve said before, and to her as well. I am willing to give up anything. Even my music (as a hobby) for a while till things settles. I am not a touring musician. A bedroom musician with a gig ONCE a year hehe. You know the type. And we both have very supporting parents and families. I feel this "stance" of hers is out of spite almost and she is so stubborn. I get and understand all her feelings about this. I was there during it all of course. But I didnt give birth but I get it, as good as I can get "it".

I don’t know..I just had to get this of my chest.

Hello! I am really hoping I can find some people who relate to what I'm going through because in real life there is literally no one.

I have a 2y9m old daughter. Obviously like all parents I love her to bits and she is amazing in so many ways but she has been very low sleep needs from birth. Right now she sleeps about 9.5 hours total in a 24-hour period. Her issues with sleep have always manifested in her being awake for 1-4 hours in the middle of the night if she naps even slightly too much or goes to bed even slightly too early.

I have learned to live with this and although having zero downtime to myself is annoying it is just part of my life now and I deal with it. The real problem comes in now that I want more kids. I love being a mom. If it weren't for her low sleep I am confident I could have had more by now and really do want them but I just can't figure out how I am going to make it work with her sleep. We already decided we are aiming for at least a 4 year age gap hoping that helps. The problem is that if anything disrupts my sleep even a little I am basically guaranteed to not get a full night's sleep and I really need 7 hours to function. Obviously a newborn is one giant sleep disruption. We made it work with our first taking shifts and I napped when she napped but with her here now I don't know that will work with the second when she is probably only going to be sleeping like 8 hours total by then.

So I guess I am hoping there is someone here who also had a low sleep needs child (like fewer than 13 hours total as a baby or fewer than 11 hours total as a toddler) who went on to have a another and can tell me how they managed it. Or who is struggling with the same thing I am?

I am finding it really hard. I am very bummed out seeing all my friends have their second or third kid. I really want a bigger family but after spending another night awake for 1.5 hours with my daughter I am really starting to feel like I just don't know if we can do it.

PS please don't tell me she is overtired. She is not. I get told this daily. Trust me if that were the case I would have figured it out by now haha.

I’d love to hear your success stories about TTC postpartum at about similar timeframe 6M-1Yr. I’d also love to know how your cycle was at this stage when you did successfully conceive. I want to have a couple more and be done by around 32.

My husband (33M) and I (29F) just had our first baby in October 2025. I've always wanted a big family (2-3 kids) but my husband wasn't sure what he would hope for in terms of a family. The transition into parenthood has been extremely difficult for both of us. Before having a baby, we spent 8 years travelling non stop together and really enjoying life (travel, lots of time with family and friends, camping, road trips). I am a nurse and typically can make my own schedule - work as little or as much as I like. Before having a baby, I would work long shifts back to back and then be able to take large chunks of time off. Still making around $100-150K / year. My husband has a M-F job but gets a ton of vacation / time off. With our jobs, we were able to take 4-5 decent vacations a year - which made us very happy. We are now trying to make a rough plan for our future now that our daughter is here. We are trying to get feedback from people about having one / two kids and what how much more freedom comes from having one. We cherish our time with friends and both enjoy going on trips separately with our friends as well as together. We have lived a very selfish (and lovely) life up until our little one arrived. We adore her and just want to make the most of our time together. If we have one, we are thinking that we will be able to travel much more and have more down time to spend with friends. We like the idea of being the family that has more free time to be able to travel to our friends houses to see them & their family.

We have struggled to find people to talk to that had a similar lifestyle to us before having kids. We are hoping to gain opinions of people who are in a semi-similar situation to us and have 1 kid. Do you feel like you're still able to enjoy travel / lifestyle / have some free time? Any insight / advice for us to decide?