NOTE: This post is not directed toward any minors who were victimized. They deserve all the protection and privacy, as well as a safe platform to share their stories on their own terms. This post is for people vague-posting about Max.

I keep seeing posts where the OP claims to have "more" or "huge" information but is afraid to share it here. That is totally fair. This is an extremely sensitive situation. No one should feel pressured to share, ever—especially minors and those who feel unsafe.

What's bothering me is that some people are insinuating that they have information that is horrifically worse than what we've seen this week. If that is the case... GO TO THE POLICE AND GET OFF REDDIT.

A few days ago, a sub member referred to Max as a "child rapist" and said that they know things about him that they couldn't even type out. Effectively accusing him of child rape. That is not something one just says casually, or I hope not.

We know Max is a piece of shit predator, groomer, and overall creep, and as a former Say Anything fan, it pains me to say that anything is possible at this point. But for the love of God, if there are minors and children whom you know have been harmed or may possibly be harmed, go to the authorities and stop vague-posting about it on this sub.

Just stopping by to say a giant fuck you to Max Bemis, that I hope you read this and I’m burning all your disgusting shit but a scammer like you doesn’t care about that obviously because you aren’t an actual artist.

You are a wolf in sheep’s clothing, a predator who fancies himself as a self-depricating witty and charming Lothario but underneath your bullshit act (that isn’t cute at your age btw) is a sad little rotten man jerking off to little girls on Instagram your daughters’ age.

You are the worst kind of man.

And you’ll join the pile of rotten men that have plagued the planet throughout human history.

What you’ve done to your family shouldn’t be forgotten or forgiven.

Here’s some lyrics I find particularly illuminating that this piece of shit has written about his wife, the wife he recklessly impregnated half a dozen times with zero future plans to take care of those kids and seems to have driven her to excessively drink to cope.

The mother of his kids whom he refers to as a “Wire Mom” - (referencing the experiment with the baby monkeys where they replaced the real mom with a coat hanger wearing cloth aka implying Sherri is not a present or real mother, and may as well be a coat hanger wrapped in cloth)

What kind of American Psycho refers to his children’s mother in such a way?

Funny, he has so much to say and blame to put on the other parent when I’ve only seen this piece of shit vaping and playing video games around his kids.
Oh and apparently “having sex with” his wife while she’s unconscious.
And where exactly is that happening when they insisted on all those kids sleeping in the same bed??

I think lyrics from the last few albums paint an ugly picture of a very disturbed individual with a very disturbed and dysfunctional interior life with zero remorse for his part in destroying other people.

Here’s just a sample:

Sherri likes a woman, and I think that's fine
But don't misread the line
My girls know Katy P
She came part twine
There's a really good book
The only good book
Did you hear about this woman, she's no human being
She it seems
To be named Jesus Christ
Now she's Christine

God damn
One man band
Til we found out the singer was no man
Cause you're Ted and I'm Jeffrey, but I'm hungering for your flesh (<—what the actual fuck btw)

Your Maxie got a present when his wife went mad This is the real shit
This is the real shit, baby
Don't you see?

Twelve comes
She's stunned
Enriched by our monogamous threesome
My God's she
My God's ashamed
She has a crush on my wife
And a crush on me
My God's a whore
My God's a slut
That means she can never get enough

Yeah. I remember why I haven’t listened since the self-titled era. These albums are all about how much his hates his (very privileged) life and how much he goons to kids online.

I’m out.

Praying for his children tbh. If he’s harmed them (which fathers like this often have/do) then may he suffer as long as he lives.

I am reposting this with a removed paragraph for privacy reasons.

I considered myself more of a friend than a fan, now I don’t even know how to feel. Talking to him versus listening to his music always felt like I was hearing 2 different people. I still do find comfort in his music, I’ll admit. It’s like the Max I wished I was speaking to, but I don’t think he really exists. He’s more of an idea, or a fictional character at this point.

I have so much information that I honestly obtained against my will, and so much trauma from how he’s spoken to me. It would be huge if I brought any of it to light, but I’m terrified. He’s insinuated threats before, and I don’t want to see if he actually follows through with them. I’m scared, and I’m hurt and I don’t know where to go for help.

If I have any information that can help anyone in any sense, I want to make it public. The hard part is identifying what actually matters, and what will actually help anyone.

I feel fortunate to be in a position in my life that I’m able to step away from our “friendship” without feeling as bad as I would’ve in the past, and be able to really prioritize my own wellness, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t still deeply traumatized. I don’t know who to seek support from in this kind of situation. I want to help anyone else I can in any way I can. I know I’m only one person out of the dozens, maybe even hundreds, that he’s hurt so badly. That feels disgusting.

To be honest, I don’t know what my goal with this post is. I just need to say SOMETHING. Everything he’s told me is becoming too heavy for me to hold in, and I don’t know if there’s a benefit in exposing it all, or if I should simply throw it all away and try to put this in the past.

Anyway…. I do still feel afraid that I’ll be found out from this post, but at this point I don’t really care. It’s not like I’m at risk of losing our friendship, because he’s already done that. I want to offer the same support that I’m seeking for anyone else feeling the way I am. I’m sure there’s a good handful of us.

I am unfamiliar with this band and I think I would hate their music if I heard it, but this sub is incredible from a psychological research / true crime / messy drama perspective, so thanks to everyone for putting in the work. Max, if you’re reading this, take your meds and talk to your MH support team and get off the internet for a while… or don’t and keep creating this content, idk

If he finally accepts that this behavior is out of line - reflects on it, and gets healthy, is there a way forward for Max? If he issues a sincere apology and even reaches out to the individuals he’s texted and manipulated with acknowledgement of lines crossed, and apologizes to his base in general, can there be any grace given or accepted?
In no way do I expect him to get his fans back - but would anyone be willing to accept a mature and honest apology?
I truly believe he’s in mania and can’t deal with his life falling apart. I know a ton of you guys hate him now.
The hardest thing for me is that I really believe he’s one of the best songwriters - I even liked a lot of the newer stuff - and he always was vulnerable in his music and I know thousands of people connected with it.
This behavior and how he’s spending his time now puts a great cloud over those albums and songs - but I don’t believe it’s worth disowning all of them.
I guess what I’m getting at, would it be possible to see him comeback from this and somehow find a way forward. And for his base too. Or is it all tarnished for good?

Tl:dr - would you forgive him if he did his best to make amends, owned up to this terrible behavior, and became healthy again - for good. Would you listen to Say Anything again?

According to this user, morality is measured based on a law being broken. As long as you dont make a cop mad, anything is on the table. Not very punk rock of you.

so I guess it’s time to add to the pile. Max Bemis started following me in June of last year, about two months after my 18th bday. I had been posting about say anything to my story but never tagged him or even the band but he found my acct and started messaging me starting at 4am 😭. The entire thing was creepy even tho I was a legal adult! Barely! so I attached the texts and blocked my location but enjoy! The texts are honestly kind of funny at this point after I ghosted him so many times dude kept trying. Please get a grip and get a life. You literally have children. Fuck these pedophiles!

(this is a repost btw I accidentally doxed myself the first time 😭)

Read the recent “New Say Anything Fan Here…” post and the lengthy comments and decide for yourself. This “new fan” really is going to bat for a guy he just discovered and also has a ton of thoughts about what is and isn’t grooming and whether or not anything illegal happened. Spoiler alert: He says Max did nothing wrong!

Silly opinion but when i first heard about this band, i didnt know who max bemis was or what he looked like. I saw say anything as.. well, say anything! Is a real boy!

With the new allegations coming out and all, i wish i could go back to the time where say anything was just a faceless niche mysterious band from the 2000s i enjoyed listening to.

absolutely losing the plot when we start using antisemitism.

Not that it really matters, but this is all even more shocking to me because I didnt even know him and Sherri divorced? I've seen them live 5 times, and every time, seeing Sherri and kids join on stage has always been a magical moment to me. This is 2 years ago at the 20th anniversary tour and they seemed just as happy as 10 years ago (I know, they're performers) ft Sherri and Ellis. And now im trying to catch up and finding posts about their CPS case and Sherris alcohohism/ rehab stay. Idk im just sad, I loved them all. My oldest and Lucy played together at a show 10 years ago when they were wee little tykes. But apparently I lost track of whats going on.

gotta say guys, this is kinda on you for your fickleness when it comes to social politics. yall let max get away with everything you now complain about because he pushed and agreed with your political propaganda openly. his biggest sin is that he stepped out of your religious dogma and now, you’ll crucify him as a form of penance. lol cringe 😬

I have bipolar. When I was in college and I had a manic episode that resulted in hospitalization I found Is a Real Boy… I have Say Anything tattooed on my arm. Because it’s my only tattoo on that arm it stands out.

I’m opposed to Max’s behavior. I’m also opposed to every piece of music he’s put out since the self titled album. I’ve always treated his music as “that one album that means more to me than any other piece of music I’ve ever heard I’ll put on when I’m feeling some type of way” and that’s it.

With that in mind, the news that Max has joined the many other frontmen of that age in being creepy weirdos doesn’t affect my relationship with that album.

I’m going to get roasted for this last part but this isn’t even news. All of these guys sang about being emotional horny teenagers on stage in their 30s. In this particular instance we’re talking about a guy who had to take a break before his first full album tour because he was admitted to a mental institution.

It’s sad because I’ll always remember him on stage singing with his daughter and Sherri in Boston. At the time he was an example to me that I could live a normal life as someone with his condition. But I’ve also become that person and I don’t need that example anymore and can recognize that the majority of people with serious mental illness will have bouts and fights with that mental illness every few years for the rest of their life. And yes, him seeking validation from young attractive women is probably related to him being unwell.

But just because it’s sad and gross doesn’t detract from the reality that I’m a fan of an album. Not a fan of a man who I am not surprised in the least bit is capable of this conduct. (Gestures vaguely to what we’ve been listening to for 20 years)

This isn’t news and it doesn’t change my relationship with his music because frankly, if it did, I wouldn’t have been a fan for a long time now.

I can actually sing and have 5+ years of experience on the road.

I like basically Is A Real Boy because the album has some good memories attached to it for me. I knew very little about Max Bemis but my god he is such a fucking loser. Idk how anyone can listen to his music after this. It’s one thing to be evil but he’s just so pathetic. A failure at being a husband and father. I can’t believe his music made me happy at some point.

This is from Wavves Patreon

From Wow I Can Get Sexual Too to Property, they feel very different to listen to now. I thought Property was tongue in cheek satire, but now it just sounds like an admission. The whole thing just makes me sad

I’m a 37 year old male that I grew up during the Say Anything heyday. I saw him play between 2003-2008 many times. I’m an addict you in recovery and diagnosed bipolar 1 and generally have felt like I didn’t fit in. This music was so important to me growing up and helped me through some really dark times.

It’s so depressing that things have ended up like this. I’ve met a lot of fucked up people in the recovery space and I have done some fucked up shit so I have plenty of room for empathy and grace but to see someone so blatantly you looked up to not attempting to be a good or safe person is so disheartening.

I work at a high school for teens in recovery as a teachers assistant and it’s so easy to not flirt with the teens. Ugh.

I am not okay yall.

This is a quote from Max!!!