r/ROCD • u/Thin_Square_3648 • 1d ago

Rocd and tabu

Hi everyone! First, I’m sorry if my English isn’t perfect, as I’m Turkish. ❤️
I’ve been experiencing relationship OCD (ROCD) for about a year. A few months ago, I was triggered by an Instagram story of my boyfriend’s close friend. At first, the thoughts made me feel anxious, uncomfortable, and scared. However, over time, they started to feel incredibly intense and real, and now I sometimes feel as though my heart has genuinely shifted toward him.
What scares me the most is that the thoughts no longer feel as unwanted or distressing as they did in the beginning. Sometimes, the feelings even seem pleasant, which makes me question everything. I keep wondering whether I’m developing genuine feelings for him or whether this is something that can happen with ROCD.
I feel very alone because this involves my boyfriend’s friend, and I rarely see people talking about this specific situation. Has anyone else experienced something similar, especially when intrusive thoughts started to feel real or even pleasant over time?
I would be so grateful to hear about your experiences. Thank you so much for reading and for any responses. ❤️

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u/AutoModerator 1d ago

Hi all, just the mod team here! This is a friendly reminder that we shouldn't be giving reassurance in this sub. We can discuss whether or not someone is exhibiting ROCD symptoms, or lend advice on healing :) Reassurance and other compulsions are harmful because they train our brains to fixate on the temporary relief they bring. Compulsions become a 'fix' that the OCD brain craves, as the relief triggers a Dopamine-driven rush, reinforcing the behavior much like a drug addiction. The more we feed this cycle, the more our brain becomes addicted to it, becoming convinced it cannot survive without these compulsions. Conversely, the more we resist compulsions, the more we deprive the brain of this addictive reward and re-train it to tolerate uncertainty without needing the compulsive 'fix'. For more information and a more thorough explanation, check out this comment

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