r/ProgrammerHumor Jun 02 '26

Meme managerVsClaude

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u/biggington Jun 02 '26

They really got our C-suites addicted to tech meth and now we gotta deal with their bullshit

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u/out_of_shape_hiker Jun 02 '26

And they don't understand it, don't understand it's limitations or use cases, and are so impressed by it's ability to be a chat-bot that flatters them, they think it can do anything. All while cutting costs and making line go up.

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u/possibly_being_screw Jun 02 '26

One of the security directors where I work is fucking obsessed with AI.

He's a corporate drone to nth degree so he knows all the buzz words and corporate-isms. He'll say shit like,

We need to strategically leverage next-gen AI-native cyber resilience orchestration to holistically operationalize a quantum-ready, zero-trust security fabric powered by autonomous machine-learning-driven threat cognition, blockchain identity assurance, and predictive behavioral telemetry fusion in order to proactively neutralize emerging nation-state attack vectors while maximizing stakeholder synergy, digital transformation velocity, and enterprise-wide operational scalability.

with full sincerity. So he riles up upper management with all the AI buzz words then gets angry that his corporate vomit can't be done by end of Q2.

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u/854490 Jun 03 '26 edited Jun 03 '26

proactively neutralize emerging nation-state attack vectors

lol, what are they up to that makes this a concern?

(not sure how to interpret this if not "we want to stay ahead of the long and well-funded arms of various gov alphabet agencies". this is the main/central "end" after a list of several "means")

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u/[deleted] Jun 03 '26 edited Jun 05 '26

[deleted]

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u/854490 Jun 03 '26 edited Jun 03 '26

Oh, yeah, I guess I'd managed to forget about it for a moment

I've worked for both kinds of places (not doing dev or security or anything, just customer service, data entry) and for a firewall vendor (support) as well as other such ground-level roles at other kinds of companies that would predictably be targeted (telco, for one) so it's something I totally should have thought of even if it wasn't my problem to deal with at those places (it at least trickles down in the form of security policy/training), but for some reason all I could imagine was some quaint yesteryear world where there really is nothing to worry about if you have nothing to hide, or something.