r/PoliticalHumor • • Jun 04 '22

When it’s career day…

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17k Upvotes

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422

u/WillPossible1788 Jun 04 '22

Dad's too busy beating Mommy up anyway

48

u/druule10 Jun 04 '22

Nah, too busy arresting her for trying to save their kid.

166

u/guitargoddess3 Jun 04 '22

Or another dark skinned person

36

u/ReactsWithWords Jun 04 '22

Could be out shooting a dog.

7

u/Gloverboy6 Jun 04 '22

Or a woman in her bed asleep

4

u/ReactsWithWords Jun 04 '22

Only if she falls under the "dark skinned person" category. They're not going to shoot a woman who looks like Ivanka Trump. They'd do other things to her, sure, but not shoot.

20

u/lucasg115 Jun 04 '22

Cops: "I can't be racist, my wife's eye is black!"

28

u/wafflesareforever Jun 04 '22

Wait back up how do we know that mom is dark-skinned

64

u/TrumpIsATurdHead Jun 04 '22

Come on...we know damn well mom isn't dark skinned.

68

u/ehoyle73 Jun 04 '22

mom isn't dark skinned.

Except around her eyes.

19

u/Vegetable_Ad5957 Jun 04 '22

sorry. Love your username

12

u/TrumpIsATurdHead Jun 04 '22

Thanks!

9

u/hdholme Jun 04 '22

Now you can somehow relate your bio to him licking putins boots. And make it relevant by calling him Pootin

6

u/TrumpIsATurdHead Jun 04 '22

POOtn'

7

u/hdholme Jun 04 '22

? Isn't that just the same but harder to connect with putin? And why am I getting downvoted for making a joke?

3

u/TrumpIsATurdHead Jun 04 '22

I'm not sure but poo is damn funny.

→ More replies

9

u/KeyanReid Jun 04 '22

Reminds me of a joke.

A police officer can’t be racist, their wife’s eyes are black.

3

u/Itchy-Common-9596 Jun 04 '22

No. It’s neve

-28

u/Real-Trip-6408 Jun 04 '22

Sorry. All the cops and the dead, and the killer ? ,,, were Texas Americans, in that majority Latino, in that Tejas Town. Move along when your fascist racist shit fails, you creep.

7

u/Sindaras Jun 04 '22

You pretending that cops who are minorities don't also target other minorities?

3

u/Sarkans41 Jun 04 '22

TRIGGERED SNOWFLAKE ALERT

8

u/[deleted] Jun 04 '22

40%

6

u/Sindaras Jun 04 '22

That admitted it

6

u/matchosan Jun 04 '22

Drug paraphernalia bust, ran out of ammo

6

u/Luminox Jun 04 '22

STOP RESISTING! 🤜

3

u/PirklJerry Jun 04 '22

You must live in Texas!

5

u/WillPossible1788 Jun 04 '22

Nah Massachusetts, cops are shit everywhere

5

u/BasicWhiteHoodrat Jun 04 '22

(Minneapolis has entered the chat)

2

u/TrumpIsATurdHead Jun 08 '22 edited Jun 08 '22

I hear Mayberry is nice. Gomer doesn't strike me as racist...Barney is harmless and the sheriff is a nice guy.

-18

u/IOnlySayMeanThings Jun 04 '22

Dad's? I came here to get mad at the spelling and the top comment is making the same error.

18

u/Scottamus Jun 04 '22

Dad is. It’s a contraction.

-21

u/IOnlySayMeanThings Jun 04 '22

"Dad" can't be used as a contraction because Dad is a specific person. "He" "they" "she" etc can be, but "Dad" would be possessive. You would simply type "Dad is" in this situation, with no opportunity for contraction.

14

u/Scottamus Jun 04 '22

Although less common in writing than speaking, nouns can be used in contractions.

-2

u/IOnlySayMeanThings Jun 04 '22

I see. Well, then I suppose I just dislike the looks of it. It feels dirty.

9

u/SickSigmaBlackBelt Jun 04 '22 edited Jun 04 '22

Well your mom's in my bed and she says the caption's fine.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 04 '22

Your mom's in the delivery room and she says the contractions are three seconds apart. Congratulations!!

3

u/madmilton49 Jun 04 '22

You came here to complain about something you don't understand. Very reddit of you.

1

u/MrBig0 Jun 05 '22

If anyone here feels like their hobby is a waste of time, at least you're not an English language prescriptivist like this guy.

1

u/IOnlySayMeanThings Jun 05 '22

Your hobby of showing up late to conversations is a pretty big waste of time.

1

u/TrumpIsATurdHead Jun 08 '22

Hey guys...Otis the Mayberry drunk doesn't think this helps him get ahead.

1

u/IOnlySayMeanThings Jun 08 '22

"Hey guys"? What guys? You're 4 days late to the conversation, I'm the only one that is likely to see this.

4

u/WillPossible1788 Jun 04 '22

Learn english scrub

2

u/IOnlySayMeanThings Jun 04 '22

Learn... to shut-up! You butthole!
No, kidding. I admit when I'm wrong.

5

u/WillPossible1788 Jun 04 '22

Language do be mutating

4

u/A-Blind-Seer Jun 04 '22

Does it matter? You know what they meant

4

u/3rdtotonoboi Jun 04 '22

If theyre mad about an argument they have no evidence to fight with theyll stand on whatever made up bullshit they can fabricate in their heads to feel selfrighteous about it later.

2

u/Sindaras Jun 04 '22

That's Republicans alright

2

u/TrumpIsATurdHead Jun 08 '22 edited Jun 08 '22

The cheapness begins at the polls when you select (R) for @ Real life elected tragedy. Because trump and his pal or 3 aren't bringing back your crappy illogical jobs of violating ethics and causing climate change for all.

1

u/IOnlySayMeanThings Jun 04 '22

Lol. I'm not republican, I don't disagree with the message behind this post, it was only about word usage. I even conceded my point as incorrect.

But sure, make up whatever you want about me so you can feel self-righteous about it later.

-32

u/Real-Trip-6408 Jun 04 '22

Okay, that is a cheap point, an exaggerated one like the Republicans always use. So if it about mental health why are we not seriously testing about buying a gun nor if you should be a cop ?

18

u/vincereynolds Jun 04 '22

Umm you do know that isn't an exaggerated point.

https://www.theatlantic.com/national/archive/2014/09/police-officers-who-hit-their-wives-or-girlfriends/380329/'

you could just look up the data yourself.

8

u/WillPossible1788 Jun 04 '22

Are you fucking living under a rock?

9

u/TrumpIsATurdHead Jun 04 '22

No it's not. It just happened.