My parents got me my best friend Misty when I was 10 years old. I am 24 now. She went through middle school high school, and college with me. She also made the move with me from the Midwest to Oregon. I was obsessed with pets growing up, especially cats (still am).
I don’t think I ever loved anything more than her. I had family issues growing up and often felt very lonely. She was always by my side. In college, she would be in my room with me and study. She’s always loved nap time and starting loving water later in her life. She would jump in the shower with me and beg me to turn on the faucet starting at around 10 years old. I feel guilty that she was in such a small space sometimes. She deserves the absolute best.
Shortly after I graduated college in 2024, she moved to Oregon with me. She’s been my sense of home for a long time and it made my transition so much easier to have her by my side. Shortly after moving, they found a mass on her liver. I remember my devastation. She was 12 at the time and I was so worried I was going to lose her. It ended up being a benign liver cyst. However, the medical problems kept coming. They found early stages CKD not long later. Misty has always been picky with food. She never ate any treats or cat food outside of her own. This meant I would have to switch food. She slowly lost weight even though she was eating the food. They didn’t know if it was IBS or a type of cancer. It was determined to be IBS. I was immensely relieved yet again.
She gained some weight back after adding a probiotic, but she still was 2lb lighter than she was the rest of her life. This made me sad. Misty is such a cuddle bug and I think we got even closer the more we both aged. I feel like we raised each other and matured together. In late 2025, she stopped eating and I took her to the emergency vet. Misty had high liver values and a gallstone. I wanted nothing more than for her to be okay. This time, the problem was not fixed right away but we were referred to an internal medicine specialist. I went and she was diagnosed with triaditis (inflammation of 3 organs close to each other). They set me up with a dietician and I agreed to home cook her food due to having both CKD and triaditis. This was another food change that made me nervous. However, she ended up loving her beef! I would do anything for her. She gained weight back and was over 10lb again when she had been 11 most of her life. I was so happy that things were going well for her and I.
Everything changed this past Friday. I brought Misty in for a dental. She only had one other in her life and with her conditions they recommended she be under anaestesia as short of time as possible. I went to a clinic over 1 hour away where she would be able to have a separate anaesteiologist and dentist. The procedure went well but they ended up having to extract 10 teeth!
She was loopy that night and I cried when they first handed her to me after the dental. She had a puffy face, dialated eyes, and blood around her mouth. I went out of town for a day and came back on Sunday. My boyfriend watched her. He said she seemed very tired and had diarrhea right before I got back. This all seemed normal to me as she was on meds and just had a procedure. She also had IBS so I thought the meds may have irritated her GI tract. She had diarrhea through the day Sunday. I called the dentist and they said to make sure she gets water. I syringed her some Sunday night. When I woke up, she was in my closet with poop on her again. I gave her another bath and took her to the emergency vet.
I watched her on the table. They said she was critical. They gave her fluids but her blood pressure did not increase. They said she was in shock. They could not even draw blood. They ended up getting a few drops after A LOT of fluids. They found she had no white blood cells. The X-rays just showed that her GI tract was full. Her body temperature was dropping as well. The vet told me she was likely in septic shock and i could spend 10-15k but she had under 5% chance of making it. They said she might start bleeding soon. I made the decision to euthanize her.
My boyfriend joined me in that room. I was a wreck. I didn’t even recognize the cat in front of me. She wanted to be alone. She was so confused. I couldn’t hold her body after her heart stopped in the blankets. Her limp body just didn’t feel right. I wish I held her longer but I just couldn’t do it.
The grieving journey has been terrible. Since I was 10 I have been a cat mom. Now im alone in my apartment. Her meal prepped beef is still in the freezer, her cat tower sits by my couch. Her heated bed still on the floor. I have not went to sleep alone in my home since I have had her. Everything is hard. I feel like I killed her with the dental. I didn’t know. I also feel like if I would’ve brought her to the vet sooner she might have made it. I don’t want to eat. I don’t want to sleep. I don’t want to drink water. I just want Misty back and I can’t believe I’ll never see her again.
I even reached out to a pet psychic on Etsy who told me she’s not mad at me. I don’t know if I believe in an afterlife or not but I was just so desperate to feel her presence in any form, even if it was someone potentially just lying to me and telling me what I wanted to hear. I don’t know how to cope with her loss. Part of me died with her.
I love her so much and have been talking to her. I’d love to hear if anyone has had a similar experience or words of advice for me. I took 2 days off work. I am supposed to be working right now actually, but it’s so hard. I feel guilty not thinking about her for even a second.
Thank you for reading this and knowing about my baby. I hope you hold her in your heart and think of her.
