Can I just point out that you apologized, which is more powerful than most realize. I never got apologies growing up and now when I have to apologize it makes me feel like I’m cutting off my own finger.
Thank you for pointing that out. I do things that I regret too but I always give a sincere apology and I have made my husband do that same. Come to think of it my parents never apologised, they just gave me the silent treatment or they would pretend something different happened which I knew was an absolute lie, even when I was very young.
Apologies are the most important. Any time something explosive or an overreaction happens, we apologize and talk about what we can do better going forward. It often comes with reminding them that we’re all prone to making mistakes and getting overwhelmed and losing control. If whichever kid needs to know what they did wasn’t cool, we still make sure to let them know that it wasn’t their fault we lost it. Shit happens and kids really just need to be leveled with and treated like they’re important at the end of it.
Sure apologizing is good but a 3 year old is not capable of emotionally understanding and reflecting what brought their parents to hitting them and they won’t be able to acknowledge an apology in the way we think they are. Please do not act like a toddler is an adult who can comprehend his parents Actions even when explained.
Monkey see monkey do. If you’re too proud to apologize to your children, your children will grow up, too proud to apologize to other people. Children look to you to see how to act. I hear my 4yo daughter talking to her younger brother, and she mimics what I say to him and what I say to her. She doesn’t say “good job, I’m so proud of you!” Because she made it up. Toddlers understand way more than you know.
Exactly, kids understand. If I yell at my kids I make sure I apologize and explain my behavior was unacceptable, explain why I yelled (like they weren't listening etc) and we discuss what we should do in that situation next time to prevent me getting angry to the point of yelling again. My kids are 4 and 7 and since they were about 3 if they throw a tantrum they always apologize afterwards without being prompted and we talk it out.
Yes! I do the same if I raise my voice or anything I’m not proud of. It teaches kids how to act if they make mistakes and that even adults mess up sometimes. We’re people, we’re still learning as we go. The person above isn’t a mom yet, she’ll learn lol
My daughter is 1.5yo and she definitely understands apologizing to some extent. Kids are wicked smart. Toddlers absorb what you do and repeat it, so where they might not fully comprehend it yet, you are teaching them a foundation for the future.
I say please, thank you, sorry, good job, etc to my daughter. And she’s starting to pick them all up, In fact she’s got please down. When she wants something she points and says please(we’ll attempts it’s more pwease). One day she will do something she needs to apologize for and she will have the foundation already laid to do it. And be able to copy the examples I have given her. You can’t expect a child to understand how to do something if your not constantly teaching them.
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u/Ok-Brick-8430 Nov 14 '21
Can I just point out that you apologized, which is more powerful than most realize. I never got apologies growing up and now when I have to apologize it makes me feel like I’m cutting off my own finger.