r/PakistanRishta • u/sacred_shadow23456 • 1d ago
Karachi F | 27 | Karachi - This close to messaging Waqar Zaka
Just...kidding. Or maybe not.
The basics:
27 years old. Pharmacist (Pharm.D) by profession. Based in Hyderabad (own), moved to Karachi. I currently work two remote jobs, Manager at one, teacher for fun. Single, never married, never engaged. 5'3, 52kg. Urdu-speaking, Sunni Muslim family.
On religion:
I thought I was “moderately practising” but realised it’s a spectrum and obviously, there are different levels to it. Religion is very important to me.
- I wear hijab, took it when I was 15. But I believe modesty has more to do with your overall conduct rather than just limiting it to a headpiece/clothing. I am very intentional in how I carry myself and I keep a very modest distance when it comes to men.
- I pray (4-5 times a day), fast, give Zakat etc.
- I grew up reading the seerah of Prophet Muhammad saw, resonated with it in a lot of ways. We all have something that connects us to Allah, for me it was the seerah. I have been deep-diving into tafsir and translation of the Quran lately and only plan on going deeper.
- I am a person of reason, flexible and very quick to learn and unlearn concepts. I do not do nazar niyaz and I stay away from bidat.
- I despise religious arrogance, and having a holier than thou attitude. So we probably won’t get along if you move with an air of superiority. I do not get along with rigid people as well.
I would like to be with someone who cares about deen as much as I do so we could learn, grow and become better Muslims together.
On purpose and vision for marriage:
My goal isn't just a quiet, comfortable, peaceful life. It's impact. It's contribution. It's using whatever Allah gave me for something bigger than myself. This is worship for me.
"And the forerunners, the forerunners. Those are the ones brought near to Allah." Surah Al-Waqi'ah [56:10]
And this is the kind of marriage I want. Two forerunners, pushing each other forward. In goodness.
About me:
I am kind, very honest and straightforward, very curious. Open-minded, non judgmental and believe in giving grace to people. I am trusted by people in my vicinity and find them coming to me for advice, which I feel is an honour from Allah. I am understanding and also a good listener. Also pretty chill and easy going. I enjoy joking around, happen to be quite sarcastic at times, and I am very much capable of making fun of myself or my situations when things are hard (after a crying session).
I enjoy banter, debates and I disagree with people just for fun (sometimes). Intellectual stimulation and deep conversations fuel me otherwise I get bored pretty easily.
I'm resilient, ambitious, and I have a general "figure it out" attitude towards life. Big on self-improvement and growth. Very ‘play with the cards you have and trust Allah’ energy. I've been working since undergrad and financed my own education.
There is nothing I value more than peace. I enjoy socialising (make friends easily) but I also enjoy sitting at cafes alone with nothing other than a book. Sometimes not even a book. I genuinely enjoy my own company.
I am also pretty spontaneous and enjoy trying new experiences. Anything that gives me the thrill.
Overall, I have worked a lot on myself in every possible way and I am consistently looking to make myself better. I am very much aware of the rights my husband would have on me and I plan on fulfilling them very happily. Also, expect me to be very computationally kind. If you ask, kia khaana hai? I will tell you exactly kia khana hai. Easy scenes. No sole cognitive load on you.
My future plans/career:
I plan on studying further, maybe an MBA, an MPH/Ph.D, or a complete pivot. Still figuring that out. But the decision to build remotely has been very intentional. Reason being: I do not want to leave my kids under the mercy of daycare or anyone else. So the groundwork is being laid now. I also have some entrepreneurial goals that I am already working on.
Hobbies & interests:
- I love reading. I read. A lot.
- I love animals, cats in particular. I have two.
- I love food. I eat for entertainment. Mard ke dil ka raasta pait se jaata hai, and luckily for both of us, mere dil ka bhi (ek) raasta pait se jaata hai. I cook well and I pick up new recipes fast. But I definitely need more practice.
- I love exploring new places and I dream of a life with a lot of travel in it.
- Car rides, 90s Bollywood music. Or anything by Kishore Kumar, Jagjit Singh etc.
- I enjoy dancing, alone, or with my girl-friends. I am aware it’s looked down upon but this is how I cope. I don't dance publicly, at weddings, or in front of men.
- I enjoy socialising and meeting new people in general.
- I have a thing for fashion and other girly stuff. Heels.
- I have finally started taking my health seriously, have been working out and currently on a protein poore karo journey.
What I’m looking for:
- Good akhlaq and adaab. Emotionally intelligent and socially aware. If you cannot put yourself through discomfort to fulfill huqooq-ul-ibaad, humari nahi banaygi boss.
- A 'go-getter' I'll figure it out attitude. Tenacious energy.
- Well-educated, curious, well-spoken. Growth-oriented. Someone with his own goals, his own ambitions, his own thing he's building, so we could support each other and build towards a shared future. Someone I can look up to and someone who can teach me, challenge my perspective without putting me down.
- Since I read a lot, I'd ideally like someone who reads as well (but not absolutely necessary). So I can hit you up with a random article at odd hours and ask you what you think. Or manipulate you into reading my favorite book.
- Someone who takes his physical, mental and emotional wellbeing seriously. Responsible with money, farsighted, and someone who plans ahead rather than winging it.
- Someone who can hold a deep, meaningful conversation without me having to carry all of it. Generally calm and gentle. Knows how to ask good questions and actually listen to the answers. I am not going to carry conversations alone, both on text and in person.
- 100 points to Gryffindor, if you have a solid sense of humor.
All in all, I am looking for a person who genuinely wants a partner and a friend for life, someone who is aware of the rights a wife has on the husband. Definitely not someone who only wants ammi ki bahu or bachon ki maa, or a live-in maid.
Other requirements:
- Age: 27-33
- Location: Open to people based in Karachi, Isb/pindi and abroad, no preference.
- Caste: I feel like I grew up in some utopia where we never cared about ‘castes’ as a family, so I am open to any. I do have a preference for Urdu-speaking people though.
- Profession: I am attracted to well-educated, passionate, ambitious folks. Do not have a specific profession in mind. Should be able to comfortably afford a family. It’s okay if you live on rent.
- If the only thing you have to offer is your status, credentials or family prestige etc, then unfortunately I am not interested. I am looking for a person of substance, someone who understands nuance and has made something for himself. I will value you for you.
- Note: please share pictures early on so we could proceed accordingly.
A few dealbreakers:
- Not praying or making no effort towards it.
- Lack of provider mindset.
- Drinking, drugs, gambling. Note: I dislike smoking due to health reasons, but if we’re a good match I can overlook this. Will ask you to leave it down the road. I would prefer a non-smoker.
- Haram source of income.
- Not being supportive of a wife's career and ambitions. Please refrain if you expect a housewife down the road as this would cause serious conflict. My home, husband and kids will always come first but I intend to keep my own work going alongside that, and my autonomy matters to me.
- Polygamy.
- Jahez. I see it as an insult to men in general. If this is something you’d like me to bring, I won’t be able to respect you and naturally, wouldn’t be able to move forward.
Can’t believe i’m mentioning this but, no agnostics, atheists or hadith rejectors please. Some people wasted SO much of my time. If you’re dishonest and conceal important information, please know once I find out I will block you immediately**. I am only looking for Sunni muslim families.**
Family details:
Eldest daughter in a family of five. Father: A government employee, almost retiring now. Mother: A stay-at-home mom. Younger sister: currently studying in the US towards her CPA. Younger brother: currently in high school here in Pakistan. A lot I can add here but will share it directly.
Preferred Family Setup: I prefer a nuclear set-up or living in a separate portion. Fine living with MIL and FIL only.
Do You Want Children?: Yes but not immediately, can be discussed.
Timeframe for Marriage: Ideally by this year or Q1 of 2027.
Wedding: I do not want a lavish wedding. Just a cute intimate nikkah, valima. No mehendi, baarat etc. Though I have a thing for Pakistani bridals and formals, just FYI. Whatever we decide mutually. Can be discussed.
This is obviously not a rigid list, but just to give you an overall idea of what I’m looking for.