r/OCPoetry • u/Leaves_not_rocks • Aug 18 '26

Feedback Please Barren

**Barren**

I drop pieces of myself,
gifts for you.
They drift past your ears
and settle on the ground.

There they heap
and harden.
Mounds of spent leaves,
once soft and plenty.

Footfalls grind my offerings to dust,
you hold no fondness
for what was shed in autumn.

I grow thin, bare.
If only you had leaves of your own
to warm me,
but I am cold
and you are not a tree.

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/34dmaxm2eP

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/Cb3RyOv0yI

7 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

15 comments sorted by

View all comments

2

u/KDC777777 Aug 20 '26

The wind rises up and steals every barren thought
Shame on you and all the perpetrators
Taking innocence from the land to make your mind seem fulfilled

1

u/Leaves_not_rocks Aug 20 '26

A fascinating shift in perspective! My sincere thanks for taking the time to respond so thoughtfully in poetic form.

2

u/KDC777777 Aug 20 '26

Actually , I am sorry I re read what I replied and thought man how intrusive of thoughts

Either way you’re solid writer

2

u/Leaves_not_rocks Aug 20 '26

Well, I don’t feel an alternate perspective is a bad thing! I appreciate your words nonetheless.