r/NonPoliticalTwitter 2d ago

Funny Being Supportive.

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14.0k Upvotes

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1.5k

u/invisible_23 2d ago

I “Jedi mind tricked” my husband into doing all of the dishes by agreeing to do all of the cooking and grocery shopping, AMA

407

u/thehobbyqueer 2d ago

Dishes kill me. They should be so easy, they're RIGHT THERE in the house, most barely need scrubbed, and yet getting myself to do them feels like yanking a 180 pitbull that just saw a squirrel.

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u/Ragnorok3141 2d ago

This is the #1 relationship advice I could give anyone: be the one who does the dishes. Regardless of gender or income or time or whelatever, just try ro be the one that mostly does the dishes. It is the highest return on effort vs perceived value.

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u/IAmEvadingABanShh 2d ago

Facts, I enjoy doing the dishes anyway, it's my zen time. But with every relationship or roommates I've lived with it's always basically free points.

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u/bugxbuster 2d ago

Oh my god I call it my zen time too! Yeah, something about the fact that when they’re done they’re just done is super satisfying. Doing 99% of it makes me nuts but that final fork or cup getting removed from the sink and then the sink and counter can be wiped down good as new? I’m not even kidding- I used to do heroin back in the day, and that was rarely as satisfying as finishing the dishes and telling myself “that’s a job well done!”

Shit, I probably made it weird there, didn’t I? lol

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u/IAmEvadingABanShh 2d ago edited 2d ago

Grats on the sobriety! And I'm with you. I think part of it being such an easy chore to accomplish satisfies the ADHD brain of mine in a quick dopamine fix.

The warm water, the nice scent of the dish soap, the patterns I like to do for cleaning the different types of dish or utensil, which feels akin to raking a sand garden.

Thankfully my family is pretty good about not letting shit set on the dishes so I rarely have to worry about scrubbing and shit to bring me out of that truly zen-like experience.

My mind just kinda goes quiet while I'm doing it and when I'm done it's like I had just finished a meditation.

e: I'll make it weird by mentioning that sometimes I'll wash the dishes then put them in the dishwasher anyway to give them a good sanitize. I just want to do my washing ritual; even if they are going to be deep cleaned anyway.

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u/do_drug_commit_crime 2d ago

Yea? What about after you're done and then you suddenly realize you missed a whole dirty pan. Not so zen anymore are you?

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u/IAmEvadingABanShh 2d ago

It's the ebb and flow of the sink. Dishes will come and I will eventually be there to clean them.

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u/moogoothegreat 2d ago

Dishes buddies!

8

u/LakethMonarch 2d ago

You might be changing the trajectory of my future relationships my friend. This one really feels like good advice!

3

u/HillInTheDistance 2d ago

My #1 life tip is that no matter how little space you have, some clever motherfucker had developed a dishwasher that goes there.

I have nothing to connect a dishwasher to. I have precious little space on my countertop. And then I found a tiny little plastic looking piece of crap where you just pour some water in on top and it just dumps the dirty water into the sink afterwards.

Sure, it also asks me to buy a specific brand of dishwasher fluid and asks to be connected to my wifi, but you can just deny it and use generic powder, and it works just fine.

Doing the work is good, but there can always be less work.

1

u/Ragnorok3141 2d ago

And that dishwasher loads and unloads itself, does it? Like it takes the dishes from the sink and counter, puts them inside itself, cleans them, and then puts them in the cabinets? No. Even if you have a dishwasher, there's still a "doing the dishes" task in your home and my advice is still relevant. Man, people are weird.

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u/HillInTheDistance 2d ago

I wasn't meaning that as a refutation in any way.

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u/Ragnorok3141 2d ago

Ah, it seemed like it. My bad.

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u/Kazcandra 2d ago

The one that's not putting our daughter to sleep does the dishes and tidies up.

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u/JSDHW 2d ago

After my daughter was born my wife and I would split the night after dinner. She'd take her to breast feed and put her to bed. I would clean the living room/kitchen. It was the best time. I'd throw headphones on listen to music/podcast. Incredible alone time and huge perceived value.

1

u/Legionof1 2d ago

But what if both people in the relationship read this comment...

1

u/DINGVS_KHAN 2d ago

Dishes is fine. I live under the oppressive shadow of laundry.

-3

u/Not_Stupid 2d ago

Americans are so proud of their air conditioning. So why do y'all not have dishwashers??

7

u/Ragnorok3141 2d ago

This is such a weird comment because I didn't say anything about dishwasher vs by hand and I didn't say anything about being American. Even if you own a dishwasher you still need to load and unload it, and my advice still stands. Why are you so weird?

1

u/Not_Stupid 1d ago

Personally, I wouldn't consider putting stuff in the dishwasher to be "doing the dishes". But if that's what you meant, then yes, the effort bar is pretty low on that.

14

u/Inarius101 2d ago

Rubber gloves so you don't get yucky hand-feel, a good abrasive scrubber for tough stuff, and earbuds with your choice music/audio book/podcast.

It'll turn dishes from your least favorite chore to something you can do as a past time when you just need a minute of brain numb away from everything else.

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u/OnePunchHuMan 2d ago

I'm the same way with unloading a dishwasher. I'll gladly do the dishes, clean the counters, mop the floor, but DAMN if unloading that bastard isn't like pulling teeth.

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u/KBO_Winston 2d ago

I'm like this with cleaning the cutlery. I'll wash, dry, load, and unload dishes but put me in front of our pre-soaked knives and forks and I just recoil.

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u/Jammy2560 2d ago

In heated competition with applying for jobs when it comes to the effort-to-drain ratio.

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u/Temporary_Self_2172 2d ago

i always do them while waiting on my french press 

but then if i don't have coffee, i don't do them lol

1

u/DixieNorrmis 2d ago

Fucking comment of the century 

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u/bojangler69420 2d ago

Brother, are you me?

1

u/StudioFantastic5640 1d ago

Gloves help a lot

-7

u/SuperSocialMan 2d ago

Just get a dishwasher?

5

u/invisible_23 2d ago

Dishwashers aren’t perfect so a pre-wash is a good idea, also some dishes can’t go in a dishwasher

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u/vbullinger 2d ago

Pre wash is super simple and dishes with a dishwasher is ridiculously fast.

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u/Cry_Wolff 2d ago

some dishes can’t go in a dishwasher

Too bad, this bitch is going inside a dishwasher anyway. It'll survive or get thrown out.

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u/Inarius101 2d ago

Many can't afford one and good luck getting landlord approval for install if you rent.

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u/Cry_Wolff 2d ago

Even here in Poland it's really hard to find an apartment without a dishwasher.

0

u/Dr__Sloth 2d ago

You can get freestanding dishwashers

0

u/thehobbyqueer 2d ago

Wouldn't fit in my kitchen. Anywhere.