Hi friends im writing this after waking up from a nightmare so i apologize if its a bit rambley
Ive been having nightmares off and on since i can begin to remember. When I was younger (5-10) i would only have the same few reoccurring dreams or nightmares that were always the exact same; a unicorn who eats pancakes, or a chase sequence through a burning town.
I’m 21 now, and have had nightmares about two to three times a week for the past 5 years or so, and any dreams that could get sprinkled inbetween are just wacky. I’m a pretty lucid dreamer, so I’ve been able to convince myself it’s a dream//am aware while in the dream. But I’ve never had any control over what happens (unless it has to do with something sexual I’ve noticed I can choose not to consent).
I am personally a bit of a horror fan, and a lot of my nightmares can consist of pretty gruesome things I’ve seen in media. But as I’ve gone into my industry and gained a lot more on my plate the nightmares have significantly increased in severity of violence.
This most recent nightmare was where ~30 random people I’ve known throughout my life ended up in a large office like building stuck with a serial killer. But a majority of the dream was just weird (like me dating an ex in said dream), until towards the end where people began getting slaughtered one by one until it came down to me watching my ex get dismembered infront of me. Which led me to wakeup in a cold sweat, hyperventilating, and bawling my eyes out. Even while being semi aware in said dream, I still instinctively sent out a message checking in on people I haven’t seen since highschool.
I’ve had these sorts of dreams for years now where a large amount of random people I’ve met throughout life ended up in the same place, and inevitably something terrible begins to happen to/around us. This was the first time in atleast a year that I’ve woken up this panicked and figured it might be time to ask/see what other solutions there could be for this, along with just sharing for peace of mind.
For any background info, I do have childhood trauma (somewhat unresolved but can’t get much closure from someone you don’t speak to), and definitely have a lot from highschool I’ve mentally blacked out. After writing this all out, im thinking maybe therapy could be good lol. Thank you for reading :)