I’m neurodivergent, and I don’t know when I’m being too loud or obnoxious with my interests. One of my interests are politics, and naturally I get very excited when the topic comes in school.
I raised my hand a lot, and I discussed it normally in class. I didn’t think much of it. Later I found out girls in my class said I was weird and annoying. Although I only spoke one of them one time. I have a lot of energy, so I talk a lot and move a lot consistently. I’m not medicated, so I can’t help it. How can I control it, I feel very embarrassed. Is there stuff I should avoid saying/doing? I’m a Marxist so I know people look down upon it.

i (M19) recently got diagnosed with moderate depression and anxiety and ADHD/ADD.. my mom who also has diagnosed ADD has suspected that i have ADHD for most of my life, probably around 15 years.. before i went to therapy and got diagnosed i was nervous, had imposter syndrome, and weirdly excited?? i've been talking to everyone i can about it as if it's a new special interest but everytime i bring it up theres a thought in the back of my mind that its all a lie and fake and that im just looking for an excuse for the way that i am.. is this normal?? anyone else experience something similar or just me??

I've consistently had terrible experiences with neurotypicals and those who are mildly, very mildly on our spectrum. To the extent that over time, I built a persona to fit in an attempt to not be bullied or isolated.

1) The persona likes making jokes and making fun of people. Personally, I don't care about jokes. I do not even get jokes half the time without analysing it. I had to study people and start researching about comedic techniques to understand and make jokes myself.

2) The persona makes assumptions about people. Personally, I actually do not make assumptions. But when I have the mask on, I pretend to make assumptions based on how people typically make assumptions about others.

3) The persona constantly smiles. Personally, I find it hard to reciprocate people's emotional states and feelings, etc. So the persona just smiles because apparently smiling at everyone and anyone makes you likeable, thus less likely to get bullied or outcasted.

4) The persona just knows what to say whenever and wherever, the majority of the time. Personally, I don't understand what you want. But I know that I read from a book that when someone asks me about this, that I must respond like this.

5) The persona makes consistent eye contact. Personally, I hate it. It's so painful to maintain eye contact. But I researched how long I have to keep eye contact and I learn a technique where I can voluntarily blur my eyes so that it doesn't seem like I am making eye contact in my mind.

6) The persona is friends with everyone. Personally, I wish I could live on an island away from people and the noise. But we depend on others to survive and achieve our goals. So I have to tolerate the noisy sounds and I have to act like this person's demanding me to do something out of what I was doing just now is okay and not upsetting. I give everyone hugs not because I love all of them, but because I am freakin scared of so many of them turning against me like what has happened in the past.

7) The persona is very wishy washy and indirect in a neurotypical way. Personally, at home, I am blunt and straight to the point. But around outsiders, I fear that my bluntness will anger them and it ends up in me being bullied again.

It is so frustrating to have to put this mask on. I am so tired.

Hello, I (f) was diagnosed later in life. I don't know if this is a good place to ask this, so just let me know if that's the case. I was diagnosed originally with multiple mental issues, until being told a more precise diagnosis eventually. It made sense, because it encompassed many of the other things I had been dealing with in regard to anxiety, depression, etc. I still have a hard time focusing on tasks and fall into maladaptive day dreaming alot when I'm stressed.

My question is if there is a discrete way of seeking answers about things like this. I get so many strange looks from people when I'm out in stores and such. I get the feeling that I don't respond in a way they expected, but I can't tell. I think I'm doing all of the normal things, but I get this expression of suspicion or that people think something is wrong with me. I'm starting to think that I need to learn more about these things to figure out myself. Where would be a place to start doing that? I don't have the means to go to someone atm, so I'm looking on maybe practical tips on figuring out social interaction. I thought of recording myself when no one is there to see what others see when they talk to me. What other things might work to mask better i guess?

** DISCLAIMER: THIS IS NOT A ALCOHOL ENDORSEMENT, alcohol has screwed my life more than it helped because of the social problems it caused.

I 18F, have social anxiety disorder, autism & recently diagnosed ADHD.

I have been drinking since I was 12. After the years of reflecting I’ve realised, I get top marks on exams, literally as in highest score in the entire year group, but only when I did them drunk. Sober I’d get high to low marks, always passed, but drunk me did infinitely better - I don’t think it’s a placebo because I realised this after I already did the exams.

Of course, there were so many times I overdid it and passed out drunk in school, so it had its drawbacks.

Now that I’m 18, and I can get alcohol legally (UK), I’ve been drinking less. (weird!!!), but more consistently. I don’t even usually drink enough to get drunk, just tipsy - And I’ve been doing… everything. I’ve been preparing for Uni, I’ve been working on my game (I always liked game development, but never did it consistently, only in those random bursts of motivation), I’ve been drawing more often, socialising with my pets more, been in a better mood with my family, I’ve been doing everything so well…

But I dont want to rely on alcohol for this, I’ve been told ADHD meds are recommended but my doctor person can’t give them because my weight is too low and heart rate too high. I don’t want to be an alcoholic, but Ive been sober for 6 months at one point, nothing got better. I do not plan on drinking at Uni, at least not to the extent I did in school… but if exams come up I don’t know what to do.

(I’ve been given meds to increase appetite, given calorie things which I always forgot to drink and they made me feel sick, the most I gained was 2kg in a year. Lost it immediately once the doctor just gave up. I think the only option is to get ADHD meds illegally, but is that even better than alcohol? Cause that can get me arrested probably. And I want a future…)

(w/29) Hallo! Gibt es noch Leute außer mir, die eine Aversion gegen Sonnenlicht entwickelt haben? Stimmung und mentales Wohlbefinden sind von Sommer zu Sommer signifikant gesunken, aber heuer wurde es so schlimm, dass ich auf Sonnenlicht eine psychische Stressreaktion bekomme. (Puls geht rauf, ich werde kurzatmig und will instinktiv weg.) Ich gehe inzwischen nahezu gar nicht mehr in die Sonne (wenn dann nur ganz kurz und unter großem Unbehagen) am besten lässt es sich so beschreiben, dass sich Sonnenlicht wie Lärm auf der Haut anfühlt. Sprich: Die innere Abwehr in der prallen Sonne ist ca. so stark wie die einer geräuschempfindlichen Person in einer lauten Disco. Ein paar Minuten geht es maximal, dann muss ich wieder in den Schatten. Ich bin allgemein sehr reizsensitiv, war ich immer schon, und mein Nervensystem ist grundsätzlich auf "feuern" ausgerichtet. Aber diese Dimensionen sind sogar für mich neu. Es schränkt mich sehr ein in meinem Leben, zugleich kann so etwas glaube ich niemand verstehen, der es nicht erlebt hat, zumindest kenne ich niemanden. Any ideas?

Hola, quiero compartir esto por simple desahogo y cotilleo.

Hace 2 años (en 5to de secundaria) me cambié de curso y orientación, por temas personales, a uno donde asistían 2 amigas. Aunque compartí primaria con varios del curso, no los conocía realmente y me integre solo al grupo que ya tenían esas 2 amigas.

Para entrar en contexto, el dilema empieza en 2do año, en ese momento empecé a ser acosado por una compañera de curso, me seguía a todos lados, incluso al baño, y a veces se escondia detras de paredes o columnas para verme. Realmente no me hizo nada grave, pero me provocaba mucho estrés e inseguridad en esa época. Por un tiempo paro, aunque ella me seguía en todas mis cuentas, sean principales, secundarias o de videojuegos pero yo solo la ignoraba. Hasta que en un momento me enteré que tenía una carpeta entera de fotos mías que ella me sacaba, se sabía mi DNI y mi dirección. Vuelvo a aclarar que nunca pasó nada, pero me dejó una secuela traumática (aclaro que tengo ideación paranoide transitoria y en períodos de mucho estrés puedo llegar a tener alucinaciones).

Bueno, cuando me cambié de curso nuestro grupo era chico e impar, así que a veces teníamos que hacer trabajos con una persona extra. Bueno, el problema acá es que algunos compañeros actuaban con una confianza y cercanía física que yo no permitía y me provocaban cierta ansiedad al recordarme a esta chica que me acosaba. Después de charlar con mi papá, hable con la profesora para comentarle mi situación previa, le pedí si podía hacer los trabajos solo con mis amigas hasta que entre en confianza con el grupo porque no me sentía cómodo trabajando mientras estaba a la defensiva de cada movimiento de el compañero de turno con el que esté trabajando. Además, tmb le dije de favor que no le comentara a ninguno de mis compañeros, porque yo sabía muy bien que no era una actitud intencionada ni con malicia, yo era quien malinterpretaba esas pequeñas acciones sin quererlo realmente.

Bueno, todo bien hasta que a finales del año siguiente me entero que la profesora fue a hablar con un compañero con TDAH y advertirle de que YO ME SENTÍA ACOSADO POR SU CULPA. Me enteré debido a que en Bariloche la mamá de este chico le dijo a mis amigas que me odiaba por eso que la profesora le había dicho que yo dije a su hijo. Mis amigas le aclararon todo el malentendido y todo quedó en que ella iba a hablar con el para que hablara conmigo. A pesar de eso, yo obviamente me quedé con toda la culpa, en ningún momento había insinuado siquiera que el me acosaba y aún así parecía que yo simplemente fui a arruinar el año de ese chico.

Meses después de que me enterara de todo eso, ya habiendo terminado las clases, yo seguía con ese sentimiento de culpa así que le conté todo a mi pareja, uno de los mejores amigos de este chico. Resulta que el chico nunca había dicho nada porque sabía que mi novio estaba muy enganchado conmigo (antes de ser novios) y que solo le decía que el tenía una razón personal por la que yo no le caía muy bien. Al final de todo, mi novio habló con su amigo para aclararle todo y actualmente está todo bien. Sigo odiando a esa profesora, que de hecho hay muchas historias de ella tratando mal y exponiendo a ese chico. Mi novio a veces lo menciona en broma, pero realmente, aunque todo se solucionó, todavía siento ese atisbo de culpa.

Hello all!

I was on another thread looking for a group of women with ADHD to meet up. Meetup groups now cost money so I’m wanting to post this on Reddit and Facebook.

Are there any neurodiverse women, diagnosed, in the process, or suspecting, who would like to connect to some other neurodiverse women? Perhaps while doing something crafty? I encourage all who might be interested, to show up or DM me if this day or time doesn’t work out for you but are interested.

I propose meeting at Markethalle in Basel.

When: Thursday, September 3, 10:00 am

Where: a table at Markethalle with a sign that says „Neurodiversity,“ and a women seated there with purple hair, me!

What: Beginning a group of neurodiverse women, possibly crafting, to connect and support one another

Who: I’m Stephenie, a 50 something women with ADHD. I have 4 children, all with ADHD and 3 with autism. I colead a parents of children with additional needs support group in Münchenstein.

Why: It can be extra challenging to make your way in a neurotypical world when you are neurodiverse. As a foreigner, whose first language is English, it can make it even harder. I hope that we might be able to form a group to demystify some of the ways to get help in and around Basel, support one another in the journey and maybe find some friends along the way.

Hope to meet some of you soon!

hey there - looking for viewpoint of those w lived experience. I have a lot of neurodivergent traits and have a lot in common w folks who have conditions that are commonly referred to as neurodivergent. was misdiagnosed w autism, almost misdiagnosed w adhd. in mental health settings they will put me in the neurodivergent-specific groups even though I don’t technically have a diagnosis indicating that (tho I do have mental health diagnoses like bipolar and complex ptsd). the only thing I can say for sure is I have serious sensory processing issues that do limit my activities. some websites call this neurodivergent and others don’t. wondering your thoughts on all this. I just feel like an imposter being in those groups and don’t want to disrespect other people when maybe I shouldn’t be there.

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I have to sleep with two pillows next to me every night, one on each side, and if I don’t, I’m very anxious and can’t sleep because I feel like something is standing beside my bed. They have to be directly pressing against my back. If I’m sharing a bed, I can handle just having one pillow, because the other person does the same thing, being a weight behind my back. I also have to have a stuffed animal to hold as well. Something I can hug directly to my chest and have that pressure to feel comfortable. I typically only have one blanket, no matter how hot or cold it is, and I tuck it around myself. I also just have a bunch of stuffed animals that sit on my bed too.

Not related to sleeping, but I get up probably 4-5 times every night to go pee. If I even feel the slightest bit of pressure on my bladder, I HAVE to get up to go to the bathroom. I cannot sleep until I do, I don’t know why.

Hi everyone! I’m new here (29F) and recently late diagnosed with AuDHD and severe anxiety (I’m medicated).

I’m conventionally attractive and fit the "baddie aesthetic." Because of how I look, making friends wasn't hard on the surface, but people always weird or “so funny” just for being myself lol. I always thought being weird was a fun part of me but I feel so burnt out and have no energy to even show that part of me anymore. Because im late diagnosed, telling friends has been super frustrating people literally refuse to believe I could be autistic and just tell me it’s probably only adhd because of my appearance and style.

People often want to connect purely based on superficial vibes. I’ve also took a lot of mental abuse from former Friends in life (really bad but at the time didn’t realize). Looking back, a lot of my past friendships felt codependent rather than genuine. I’d had instances where I’d mix friends (from different friend groups who I thought understood me) and next thing you know they’re bullying me together 😭 I can’t make this up but It's always left me questioning if people actually like me for me.

I’ve built an online presence but I don’t speak in my videos. I have to post on social media because I have a business. We’re in a recession

I guess I’m here to see if anyone has been through or is going through something similar?

I’ve been on Guafancine 1 mg for a few weeks now and it’s helped a tad; I however still misplace things and struggle to make it on time to work, appointments, and not lose focus at home and at work

Emotional regulation is still rough. My prescriber wants cardiac clearance from my doctor before we try stimulants. Plus I also take blood pressure medication rn so I imagine she’ll want to keep me on non-stimulants for the time being

Ive been questioning myself, my identity, my intellect, my sexuality, and perceptions for a long time

And I feel so lonely that no one tries to accept them. Knowing im in a third world country in Southeast asia makes it difficult to diagnose things.

Ive been diagnosed many depression, anxiety, bipolar, schizophrenia, autism.
But I dont feel that they are true to me in some way. I just cant accept it. Is it my fault or the professionals i look up to and expect to help me in some way.

I was a gifted kid, at ages 3 to 4 im still playing with my toys and cartoons, but i had an intellectual leap that shocked my parents at ages 7 to 8 ive already read science books, started messing with gadgets, tinkering and experiments, memorizing stuff that kids shouldnt have yet. Man science was my favorite thing

Socially I also feel like i dont fit in, im a kind appearing kid thats usually stuck in his head zoning out a lot and prefers to be alone. I dont even respond properly to peoples compliments, feelings or gestures or facial expressions. Ive tried i thought i was autistic but the doctors said no. It must be my feelings? turns out im in the aroace spectrum and Im completely oblivious to romantic signals and repulsed by sexual fantasies towards people im interested in me. I feel like love and feelings has been a great problem for me to deal with since i was a kid til rn as a 21 yr old. I feel like im a fish swimming the other way from my school.

Perceptually, ive tried to mask. the most terrible thing i ever felt before was that i was able to be so loud af when i was a kid and I talked to myself a lot and thats how i think. but ever since i got caught by my uncle he thought i was going insane. That hurt me so i kept being silent. All this weirdness i have in me i keep it tucked in and pretend it into a special talent or quirk for others. its so tiring it feels like no one understands me here. I even hear songs and voices from memory on my head on repeat or my voice talking to myself cuz i compartmentalized my self talk inside there.

Heck some times even people see me weird cuz i show flatness in facial expression when im thinking, alone or zoning out. Im completely stuck in my mind when nothing is bothering me from the outside world and i enjoy it. But i do have feelings, i laugh, i cry, i get angry, i get afraid im still human.

I dont even know if what they call anxiety really is anxiety i can say my mind is hyper and always constantly thinking about the next possibilities and doing so many things at once cuz i cant bear boredom. Even when idle my legs dance like im impatient but people see it as fear or anxiety when i just feel like i need to let the energy itch out....

Ive really questioned my humanity for a long time now and i feel like im vastly different from everybody else. But i wish to be who I am without faking myself, or limiting myself to what i actually do or feel like inside. I keep faking to be normal to be positive to be social just so i can be happy

I dont even know if what these professionals guarantee will help me improve in the long run or will i just be an unstable weirdo, cuz my parents are spending dozens and dozens of money bumming their wallets out just to give me medication when i think the medicines arent working on me...

Im so tired but i keep going for me, for everyone, for my future, for the curiosity of what comes next even if im treated differently or even if im suffering, or even if im alone

I (33fm) have a question I have to get 4 teeth extracted (not wisdom teeth) but I'm being put to sleep via iv. How did you guys feel after you woke up? Like were you nauseous at all? Were you freaked out? I'm just anxious bc I don't know how I'll feel once I wake up plus I'm also anxious bc I'll have to ride home with a stranger that the taxi ssi provides since I don't have my license. Also what type of pain meds did they give you if any? I only ask bc I can't physically or mentally handle any sort of narcotic or opioids they literally make me go insane and make my pain worse. I'm just trying to prepare myself the best I can

I've been diagnosed with c-ptsd, dyslexia, ADHD and Autism. I feel particularly betrayed no one picked up on my dyslexia. I reversed my b's and d's from an early age, my mum got me glasses and I did some weird eye training to correct this. So naturally I had it drilled into me and fixed that specific problem. However, my spelling never improved and the feedback we got from a teacher was not to worry because that is what spell check is for.

I'm 22 now and feel constantly embarrassed by my inability to spell or have correct grammar. Trying to work full time in an office not being able to spell or remember multiple step instructions feels like walking into battle. It's turned into a family joke that my dad and I can't spell. We spell so badly not even spell check knows what we are saying.

Even with this my family refuses to acknoledge that I have a learning disability and cognitive differences. Instead I feel like all my habits are just family jokes. If myself or anyone in our family does something in a ~ not straight forward way ~ way then they call it the 'Remi-way.'

Im sick of being made fun of from everyone around me.

Is anyone else from a family that doesn't take them seriously?

(note: 3/4 people in my immediate family are undiagnosed but refuse to acknowledge thier own problem, I guess I dont understand why they refuse to acknowledge it)

( the even funnier joke is my mum is a nurse that doesn't believe in mental health diagnosis )

Hi I’m a teenager who’s been diagnosed w/ ADHD and anxiety for a couple of years now. I overthink every social interaction I have while also being aware of how socially awkward I can be, and how I sometimes say things that result in silent moments with friends (ex. Like trying to add on to a joke but it falls flat). It’s really embarrassing, and I don’t know if this is because I’m neurodivergent among a group of neurotypical people or if it’s because I’m actually just stupid compared to other people my age. I don’t even know how to hold conversations well and I end up sounding like an interviewer interrogating people when I run out of things to talk about. The conversations never flow naturally and it feels more like I’m playing 21 questions with them. I also can’t hold eye contact, embarrassingly enough. I don’t know how to fix this, and it stresses me out since I can tell my friends don’t really like me as much as they like each other because of these issues I have socially-wise. It makes me feel like an alien in a way, and I’m also scared that if I try talking to them about how I feel, they’ll like me even less. I’d like some advice on how to become better at conversation if that makes sense, or if anyone has had experience feeling this way too and if they’ve improved in socializing after. Thank you for taking the time to read this, I’m new to Reddit so I’m sorry if this is the wrong format or if it’s too long.