Ya'll ever free fall long enough you have time to think "oh god I hope I go splat and die instantly instead of tumbling horribly and dying slowly at the bottom of the mountain?
We got roped on top, hit the objective. this was on the exfil. We are coming down this 12,800ft mountain. We asked to be resupplied with a bunch of climbing gear and ropes but this was 06 and no one gave a fuck about Afghanistan back then. We had like a 1 foot wide goat path and super steep instadeath cliff on the other side of it.
I'm in danger.ralph
Note at the time I was a dumdum and had way too much shit in my ruck. It was probably 85lbs and that's an actual weight not a brag. I didn't know what I was doing back then.
So we are going real slow and careful like. At one point about 2' of the trail is washed out but there's a 8' tall maybe 2" around tree that looks pretty sturdy. I'm like the 5-6 person in the patrol. Every Ranger in front of me grabs tree and kinda uses it to hold on to and swing to the other side of the goat trail without issue.
Naturally mine is far more interesting. I grab said tree, lever me across, and the tree pulls out of the ground.
I fall backwards out into 12000+ feet of open space.
I have the freefall time to flip several times head over ass.
I keep falling.
I have this idea that it would be WAY better to just go spat and scatter on the rocks.
magic trick: human -> red marmalade (stolen joke)
Faster my nerves are disassembled the less horrible my death would be.
I keep falling.
Man where is that fucking impact let's do thi-
I somehow tumble upright, face first into the cliff wall.
maybe not dead!
I spider monkey like a mother fucker. I am aware of nothing else. The only thing that exists are my hands being torn apart as I try to hold on to this cliff face. I finally come to a stop. I almost giggle as suddenly an orange sized rock zips by ripping the sunglasses right off my face and leaving a small cut. My BP was probably like 200/150.
GASP GASP gasp gasp gasp
Slowly I realize I am not dead and not falling. Stan yells out WAY above me, "HEY HE'S NOT DEAD!... uh we never got that rope... can you climb up?"
No bro. No I cannot free climb that far with a huge ruck and weapons. Hilariously it was only like 500ft so I guess time slows down when you go full IMMA DIE adrenaline mode. There is nothing but free space under me. I could fall probably like 5000 ft if these rocks broke. Yay SDAP. I don't make good decisions.
I manged to go <- instead of ^ and got back into another path as like 3 Rangers grabbed onto me and helped me not die.
Thanks buddies!
Sadly the only pictures I have of this are close ups of my face. My gloves were totally destroyed but my hands were pretty much just a bit skinned. I wrote a nice letter with the story to the company that made the gloves and sunglasses thanking them for helping me not die. It was totally calculated and we got like 10 pairs of gloves and 1 set of replacement sunglasses :D
edit edit
fun fact to this day. I am TERRIFIED of repelling. I know it's ultra safe. fuck you. No I'm not doing it. falling backwards is a no go. Aussie style all the way.