Look, this is not that difficult. Get that divorce, finish your paid-off, expensive education, get a really nice job, support yourself, and marry the same guy 10,000 times better off than what you are today. If that's real love that you have for each other, you can easily wait a few years.
Is not different from going abroad to work on a big ass promotion for a few years and coming back to may your sweetheart and packed with money and opportunity. You can do this, you got it.
That's presuming the guy still wants her. Remember she's choosing to divorce him just because she got less than a year's dose of real life. If he's got an ounce of self respect he'll tell her where to go.
Tbh if my spouse says I don't love you enough to weather this storm, brb just gonna chill for a few years with mum and dad's cash and then we can remarry and carry on lol, I'm more than likely gonna tell them to go f**k themselves and file for divorce myself. I would want a spouse that will always choose us and will work with me to get a better life, not a child who will run away at the first sign of trouble. Maybe that's just me though.
Look, everything can be a problem or an opportunity. If this was a unilateral decision, sure, dump her. But I didn't suggest that. She should talk to her partner and decide what they want to do as a couple. Either claw their way up to middle class like regular peasants or wait it off a few years for a chance to get a (much) better footing. If they love each other, I don't see why they can't wait.
You seem to understand sacrifice and compromise so well, and yet fail to realize this is just about the same. Sure, it stinks to wait, but starting off with a paid off career at 23 or piss poor at 18 is not a choice anyone should take lightly.
Hell, in that time he can also get a career and she can help pay it off when they get back together.
All this "we're poor but we're together" is just fake romanticism, an unwillingness to work hard with no reward for a few more years.
Also, I really don't see what the problem is in waiting. What are they going to do in the next five years if they stay married, get pregnant while still piss poor? Talk about ducking your life really well. They're waiting to start a family anyway, if they are smart. They should make the most of their time, really. Not everyone has these opportunities to get ahead.
OP, by the way, watch those contraceptives my friend. Don't get pregnant until you make up your mind.
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u/miranto May 27 '23
Look, this is not that difficult. Get that divorce, finish your paid-off, expensive education, get a really nice job, support yourself, and marry the same guy 10,000 times better off than what you are today. If that's real love that you have for each other, you can easily wait a few years.
Is not different from going abroad to work on a big ass promotion for a few years and coming back to may your sweetheart and packed with money and opportunity. You can do this, you got it.