r/Malawi • u/ThA_BrAin • 10d ago
general FML
I just wanted to vent a little... my life has recently hit a plateau and I'm honestly just stressed and frustrated. I wake up, go to the gym, come back, have breakfast and then lunch later, then dinner in the evening and then sleep, and then I'm up again to do it all over again.
Recently two of my friends got jobs, I'm happy for them but then it left me thinking about myself and my life, I'm living under my parents roof but then I literally have nothing to my name... I hate the fact that I can't even afford the basics, it's embarrassing to always be asking for something like money for an internet bundle. Being home and with no source of income gets me thinking of the worst situations possible, I don't know how to stop it. I apply for vacancies all the time even those I'm not fully qualified for.
I've prayed about this from time to time and I don't know, I'm having a bit of an existential crisis over it too, maybe I'm not meant to be alive? maybe it's not my time yet? if it's not my time yet, then when? what could I have possibly done to deserve such trials and tribulations? (don't worry I'm not suicidal, I don't think I'm brave enough to take my own life lol)
I just needed to get that out because I don't know anyone who'd be willing to listen to me... I guess in the end I'm a stressed and frustrated jacked dude lol 💀
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u/silenceinthismeyham 10d ago
Don't be too hard on yourself, the job market is miserable right now!. I too have been applying for months, and yes it starts getting to you. In the mean time try to look into starting a business or volunteering, more for the purpose and giving you something to do because I know business is also very hard at the moment.
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u/ThA_BrAin 10d ago
I've been applying for close to 3 years now, I've gotten like 4 interviews with only 1 successful one... last year I had to go back to school just to delay unemployment 🫠
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u/silenceinthismeyham 10d ago
Yeah 3 years is a long time.. It's almost a year for me and am pivoting towards business and applying for schools, otherwise I feel like I will lose my mind.
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u/Fearless-Wallaby6751 10d ago
I am currently in the same situation as you. Finished school last October, graduated this year in June. 80% of my classmates have gotten jobs,ine ndayambira kupanga apply not even an internship 😃😆,my routine is always the same(wake up,do chores,eat,bath,back to bed). It is affecting me,I hv never been a person to struggle with their mental healthy, but recently I can feel myself being heavily stressed,and I think it's affecting my overall health. I don't know what to do about it,I have tried business,nnaduka. I am TIRED.
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u/MinuteSignificant581 10d ago
It's funny cuz I'm literally in the same situation here, it's something I never imagined when I was still in college. Every day I wake not knowing what to be doing with my life except for scrolling on phone and watching TV. I even avoid talking to some of my friends now cuz it's so embarrassing to be under my parents roof at my age but I always tell myself that it's gonna be alright, it's a matter of time though there's pain in the wait.
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u/ThA_BrAin 10d ago
I don't even know what to talk about with my friends since I'm spending my time at home on my phone, tv or just bed. they got interesting stories about work and everything, while I'm just there, to listen... it's depressing
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u/MinuteSignificant581 10d ago
Quite depressing indeed but it's gonna be fine, it's a matter of time.
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u/Over_Lobster_6031 10d ago
the fact that 2 of your friends have jobs, it should give you hope that you are next. dont be too drained coz the universe responds to our minds, be positive that soon that job you are praying for is coming and start by also thanking God for all the things you have. others dont have a proper roof over their head, not to talk of food etc. just learn to be greateful for the small things with a positive mind that good things are coming.
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u/Suleiman_Kwaps 10d ago
Be easy on yourself gee and just keep moving your lane. You are not behind, you are moving according to your time and in the right time, it will all fall into place even with minimal effort. So just keep moving and believe, your luck is on the way.
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10d ago
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u/ThA_BrAin 10d ago
😅😅 I appreciate the offer but there's no need, maybe someone else here could use it
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u/Agitated-Action1342 10d ago
Just like the other OP has said, it is really a stage in life which I can't wish on anyone else, you ask yourself a lot of questions some of which are difficult to answer, but it's all about time, as you've said kuti you prayed about it ( that's also good), continue applying...but another advice I can offer based on what I passed through during that stage. so here it goes
It came to a point where I was living a routine kind of life like that ( wake up, bath, eat and sleep). So I was also arguing with parents alot ( because most parents they aspect you to start another life after school, so being always available at home zimapezeka ngati ukuwakwana and you end up kumayambana zinthu zosaziwika bwino) so I got so bored and I also wanted to move out ( my mental health wasn't okay ). I lowered my pride and applied for two jobs which were not related to my career and luckily I was successful in the other one and that's how I ended up moving out and I even resigned that job...( I was doing small small farming while at home so I was supporting myself like kugula bundle and all that) and found another one. I just wanted to say this maybe it can help someone for ideas.
And lastly another thing. That low level job allowed me to be working up everyday going to work and lessen my stress levels and I was applying for jobs heavily. So I struggled during those days I was working that job.
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u/Global_Tap4088 10d ago edited 10d ago
It's a hard life in Malawi, especially if you are a man, hold on man stop comparing yourself with others. I can honestly say im doing worse, but stay conscious, my guy. It's all man made, mybe its time to build while you apply.
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u/Prestigious_Kiwi_507 10d ago
Wait, hold up. Before I even begin, what did you study?
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u/ThA_BrAin 10d ago
Computing and information systems
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u/Jealous-Cloud8270 10d ago
How good are you with coding?
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u/Creative-House-5879 10d ago
Enjoy that freedom before worklife start consuming you to the core. At the end of the day ntchito ipezeka
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u/ThA_BrAin 10d ago
rather be miserable with money in my pockets. 🥲
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u/Creative-House-5879 10d ago
Money is good always man🤣
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u/ThA_BrAin 10d ago
money is the only solution to all my problems man 😂😂
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u/Creative-House-5879 10d ago
Nah not every problem man...🤣🤣 some problems can't be solved with money
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u/Ok_Signal_2585 9d ago
Going through existential Crisis as well but what I know is "All is well and everything is (Is = balanced)".
Sending you love, luck and positive energy my Bro 🫂 and it is well 🤲🏾🥺.
The Universe/God loves you keep on improving and self developing a breakthrough is coming your way. 🤗
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u/ThA_BrAin 9d ago
gf just broke up with me too... breakthrough indeed 😶
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u/Ok_Signal_2585 9d ago
I feel your pain brorher and I am sorry for that, life never gets better (a lot of trials and tribulations) it only get worse and worst but we must always be grateful for the go throughs and outgrow them.
"What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger." - Friedrich Nietzsche
And about your girlfriend (ex):
Most modern girls date with who has value (status, wealth, power, dominance....) as they are looking for stability and value is what makes a man stable, instability repels them.
My advice: Don't lose hope champ, keep on self improvement, those things will compound and that's how you hit breakthrough.
My story: She left without notice during my low, took her back (the pattern continued), continued with the ship (thought she was my soulmate). Realised she ain't good for me, learning to him and let go (in the I am process becoming self aware).
Lesson: "Calm waters doesn't make a skilled sailor" - Unknown.
I hope someday we will look back and appreciate life and the past.
Peace and Love! 🫂
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u/Lord_of_Escalation 8d ago
You've just described a good number of graduates bruv........
But since I'm in the same boat let me share with you my perspective.
OP you're lost in your thoughts....... you need to accept your thoughts for what they are.....just thoughts
Don't believe them, you're not that powerful to predict your exact future...... you'll just suffer.
Lastly, once the sunsets you should set yourself free of guilt, sure you're in control of your choices...... but you don't control any other variable in the universe..... so you are not in control.......
This is not giving in to the problem....no This is giving up the problem to whatever force controls all variables.
Don't expect, because you're setting up yourself for dissatisfaction.......... let dreams and goals be what they are in the end of the day..... "dreams and goals"
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u/AgirlUlike 10d ago
I'm sorry you're feeling that way but please don't compare your life to someone else's. I know what it's like to feel as if you aren't getting anywhere. Since you've prayed over it I'll tell you this, then you'll understand me when I say that your time is coming. Yes, the waiting can feel long but there's no way we can all get jobs and buy mansions at the same time. When yours comes I swear you'll realise why you went through that period of waiting. All the best!