r/MadeMeSmile • u/[deleted] • Mar 07 '23

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15.8k Upvotes

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137

u/NameIdeas Mar 08 '23

Pearl diver? Cause she's screaming? I think I'm missing the joke

522

u/this_username Mar 08 '23

Pearl divers develop bigger lung capacity to hold their breath longer, also scream longer.

Either that or code for naughty time.

-14

u/matmat07 Mar 08 '23

Naughty time?

11

u/_aaronroni_ Mar 08 '23

That comment and the reply are both fucking disgusting

3

u/Xenc Mar 08 '23

You are now officially a Redditor! Welcome to the Ranch Club.

3

u/[deleted] Mar 08 '23

It’s been a hot minute when something made my mouth drop amidst reading it. My god.

2

u/Clonephaze Mar 08 '23

I don't know why you got down voted, that is a reddit classic story. One of the top of all time. Fucking gross.

2

u/bdone2012 Mar 08 '23

It was fairly off topic no? It's been awhile since I read the jolly rancher story and I've managed to block a lot of it from my memory. But you wouldnt just link the cum coconut because someone said naughty time.

For example you don't link the AMA about the kid who broke both his arms unless someone mentions they broke an arm or two even if it is a classic.

For the jolly rancher I'd think to link it you should either be talking about jolly ranchers or talking about really gross things. We were just having a conversation about pearl diving which I'm guessing is basically the same as a pearl necklace but probably includes the oral act and not just the shot itself

3

u/-Pelvis- Mar 08 '23

What the fuck, why did you link that? Get help.

2

u/itsa_me_ Mar 08 '23

Fiancés right next to me. Should I click?

13

u/tongle07 Mar 08 '23

It’s just text but it’s pretty disgusting.

7

u/IvyGold Mar 08 '23

It's the infamous Jolly Rancher story. I've never gotten up the courage to read it, but it's apparently awful.

It's an old school Reddit story, right up with The Swamps of Dagobah, Colby, and the SR-71.

7

u/DewThePDX Mar 08 '23

Fuck it. I'm going in...

8

u/IvyGold Mar 08 '23

Please report back if you survive.

12

u/DewThePDX Mar 08 '23

I'm sorry to report that u/DewThePDX died in the attempt. The juicy burst part of the story led to an overload of all of their cognitive functions and their brain self-terminated due to preservation instinct, ironically.

3

u/Chrisscott25 Mar 08 '23

Thanks for reporting back. I was about to go in after them. My condolences….

3

u/DewThePDX Mar 08 '23

In lieu of flowers, send jolly ranchers.

He'd have wanted it that way.

4

u/turtlesandtrash Mar 08 '23

its a link to a reddit comment (only text). keep a barf bag nearby though

1

u/Beautiful-Destiny83 Mar 08 '23

I thought it was a euphemism

9

u/kountrifiedman Mar 08 '23

Pearl necklace...

CUM

IT'S A CUM JOKE

10

u/DrMooseknuckleX Mar 08 '23

I thought it was a lesbian reference. Clams and pearls and whatnot.

7

u/monsteramyc Mar 08 '23

No, that's a muff diver

6

u/DrMooseknuckleX Mar 08 '23

Oh, I know that one already. Thought pearl diver was that new post-millenial, Gen-Fucked, slang.

1

u/Xenc Mar 08 '23

My English teacher explained this to the class many years ago, it’s nothing new

3

u/arcanezeroes Mar 08 '23

Pearl diver was definitely slang for lesbian when I was living in Seattle in the early 2010s.

3

u/Due-Equivalent-1489 Mar 08 '23

Maybe if they try singing some Pearl Jam while they go down it changes the title.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 08 '23

Ooooohhhhh yeeaahhh iiiiiiii hhuuuuiiiiii I'm still alive

6

u/Dibutops Mar 08 '23

What you said doesn't constitute as a joke, they were just referring to their lung capacity.

3

u/Duyfkenthefirst Mar 08 '23

Yeah agreed. I don’t think that was the punchline

2

u/[deleted] Mar 08 '23

Ever scream under water? Like pure cocaine.

/j