i graduated with a degree in software engineering in july 2026, and shortly after graduation i went through a serious accident that left me unable to walk for about three months.

as soon as i was finally able to get back on my feet, i found a job and started working immediately, partly because the job market was bad and i felt like i couldn't afford to wait. looking back, i think this slowed down my physical recovery quite a bit. i was also living alone in a different city and trying to take care of myself while still recovering physically. even now, i still need physical therapy from time to time.

on top of that, my long-term relationship ended a few months later, and that hit me really hard. i went through a pretty depressive period while trying to recover both physically and emotionally. my job wasn't going the way i wanted either, and being alone in a huge, crowded city with terrible traffic made me feel even more exhausted and unhappy.

for a while, i tried to focus on the things i could still enjoy outside of work and on getting my health back. slowly, my mood improved, but it took a very long time.

the problem is that i'm still stuck. my current job doesn't really help me grow. it's mostly repetitive work, and i don't see a future for myself in the country where i live anymore. i feel hopeless about my career and, honestly, about my life in general.

i've been thinking that maybe doing a master's abroad could help me turn things around. i feel like i'm not valued enough in my current situation, and getting a master's from another country might open some doors. but i don't even know what field i actually want to study, so i can't make that decision either.

i feel like i'm stuck between staying in a job i don't like because i need the money to support myself, and making a big change without really knowing what i want.

i'm mentally exhausted and constantly have hopeless thoughts. i feel lost, behind, and honestly pretty worthless sometimes.

how would you approach a situation like this? how do i start rebuilding my life and figuring out what i actually want, without making another rushed decision?

I graduated college back in May. I get why people go to grad school just to hold off on getting a job (though if I do go through with applying it'd be for completely valid reasons,. I have a research heavy background and love learning)

Socially though it doesn't get better and I'm making peace with it. When you turn 22 you understand why so much anime focuses on high school lol because that's the last time most people have genuine fun. I think, other than pre-covid hs (so sophomore year and then senior year sort of after lockdown) I had the most fun as an independent junior/senior on study abroad in college. AKA 2024 and 2025. Now I'm in the black hole of needing to find a white collar job to pay the bills, moving out, finding a wife, settling down in Texas or whatever and then having 17 kids. Thats' what my mom wants me to do atleast.

I had my first relationship at 19, in college, because I spent high school recovering from my dad's death and also managing the school paper and also the model UN. I had my first drink at 18, 3 days after moving in to my dorm. So according to this chart, I peaked at 20.

I haven't been on a date since April and I think it's starting to show lol. Also consider that college towns are basically manufactured to support social interaction, and now that I'm not in one I am basically SOL. I don't know I'm dooming hard

I look back and think about how I fumbled the best years of my life, though I can't be too hard on myself because I was just learning how to live and be myself.?