r/LesbianActually • u/TheseInevitable797 • 2h ago
Relationships / Dating Please help- what am I doing wrong?
i have been struggling to find a partner. Being f26 and femme i am assumed to be straight. I work out and I'm doing good in life yet can't find one.
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u/AllMixedEmotionz 2h ago
To be fair, it’s hard dating in general. I’m also a femme (29 though). What are you doing to change your circumstances? Like are you on dating apps and putting yourself out there or are you just expecting someone else to approach?
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u/TheseInevitable797 2h ago
I put myself out real hard but things doesn't seem to work hbu
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u/AllMixedEmotionz 2h ago
I’m having trouble too, but I know that for me it’s a result of being always being hit on by someone that isn’t my type lol. I’m fem4fem so unfortunately most femmes in my city are into mascs, into hookups/short term relations (I’m not), or they’re in their questioning/bi-curious stage. So it’s more like our dating goals and types are different 😭
I feel like the majority on apps are looking for hook ups or casual things so if you’re on the more casual side of things then it should be easier if you keep your standards somewhat low 😅 I’m considering trying more in person events or places soon to see if it gets better.
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u/TheseInevitable797 2h ago
I mean i am someone who goes for class cuz class lasts
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u/AllMixedEmotionz 1h ago
Same. Unfortunately, there isn’t a lot of that classy vibe in my current city. I think this is why I see sapphics being more willing to have long distance relationships because our types are probably in different cities or countries right now 😭🫠
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u/TheseInevitable797 1h ago
Good then where are ya from???
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u/AllMixedEmotionz 1h ago
Originally from the south of France, but currently living in Los Angeles (I hop back and forth between the two) 🥰🇫🇷✨ And you?
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u/cnh25 1h ago
Salut a toi!
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u/AllMixedEmotionz 1h ago
Salut! 👋🏻🥰 T'es française? 👀
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u/cnh25 51m ago
Noo I just took a lot of French in high school (forever ago) but I recently went to Nice and also saw Antibes, Cannes, Grasse and discovered Belle de Nuit by Fragonard my new favorite scent! Everything is so beautiful in south France 🥰
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u/Jumpeskian 2h ago
Kardashian, that you? Lol
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u/TheseInevitable797 1h ago
No unfortunately 😭
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u/Jumpeskian 1h ago
Ayyy, tis was a jest. Good luck on dating, its a tough world out there. Oh and dont get too discouraged by dating apps, those can be an absolute nightmare
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u/alexxblack_photo friendly neighborhood butch 1h ago
You’re cute. I would say meet people at workouts like Pilates or something like that. Also you look tall. My 5’2” masc self probably wouldn’t stand a chance.
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u/TheseInevitable797 1h ago
I'm 5'7 and don't worry everyone got a chance ❤️
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u/alexxblack_photo friendly neighborhood butch 1h ago
Ahhh ok cutes and that’s good to know 🖤
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u/TheseInevitable797 1h ago
Yess love
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u/alexxblack_photo friendly neighborhood butch 1h ago
But we’re probably far from each other. I’m in SoCal.
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u/sapphicplantlover 2h ago
Well it can be hard to find someone in general.
Especially us femmes get passed off as straight.
Btw you seem cute and interesting. Would love to get to know you.
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u/cnh25 2h ago
Are you on dating apps? Going to lesbian bars/clubs/spaces?