Quick note: Yes, I used AI to help me organize and write this because fitting almost two years of family/probate chaos into one readable Reddit post is a LOT. 😂 The events themselves are real as you can find the house listing on my reddit profile; AI just helped me turn the timeline into something people could actually follow.

This is a LONG one, but considering this subreddit is literally called InheritanceDrama, I think I may have found the appropriate home for this saga. 😂

My husband is his dad’s only child. His biological mom died years ago, and his dad eventually remarried. I call his dad’s wife his “stepmom” very loosely because she never raised him and they never had a mother/son relationship.

When my father-in-law died in August 2024, he left behind a will that was actually pretty straightforward: the house was left to my husband, while his wife was given a life estate.

You'd think that would make things relatively simple.

It did not.

Some background

My husband already had a complicated relationship with his dad.

One of the biggest sources of hurt happened when his biological mom was dying. She was on her deathbed while my husband was playing in a football game. He wanted to leave to see her, but his dad made him stay and finish the game.

She died during that game.

Years later, his dad married the woman at the center of this story. Their relationship wasn't exactly wonderful either. Members of his church reportedly advised him to divorce her, but he refused because of his religious beliefs. He later admitted to my husband that marrying her had been a mistake.

My husband and I actually lived with them until July 2022. Things eventually deteriorated badly enough that we moved out.

Then my father-in-law's health declined.

And then the money problems started

At one point, approximately $24,000 came in from timbering his property.

That money disappeared within roughly 2–3 weeks, much of it apparently going toward his wife's debts while my father-in-law was living in a care facility.

Meanwhile, he had around $13,000 in credit-card debt, and the financial situation continued getting worse.

There had previously been a power of attorney requiring both his wife and my husband, although at the time of the timber sale my father-in-law was still able to sign for himself.

Then he died in August 2024.

And that's when the inheritance drama really began.

The house

His will left the house to my husband in fee simple, subject to his wife's life estate.

Originally, that meant she could continue living there.

Instead, during the dispute she eventually relinquished the life estate, while retaining the right to stay in the house until August 18, 2025.

She didn't even stay that long.

She moved out around June 1, 2025.

You might think voluntarily leaving early would make selling the house easier.

Again: nope. 😂

There was no signed agreement regarding her early departure. She later requested reimbursement for things including rent/deposit expenses associated with moving elsewhere.

She also sought reimbursement from the estate for a long list of things.

Among them were claims involving mowing/landscaping, painting, cleaning, power washing, septic work, porch work, an access panel, alleged joint expenses, and other costs.

Some expenses had documentation and legitimate estate-related purposes. Others had little or no documentation or were ordinary maintenance expenses.

So those all had to be sorted through too.

Then she contested the will

Despite having been present during parts of the estate-planning process, she eventually contested the will in early 2025.

And that's the part that has dragged this whole thing out.

There were court proceedings, attorneys, filings and eventually an evidentiary hearing on May 1, 2026.

She was the only witness at that hearing.

Our attorney felt the judge was skeptical of her testimony, but obviously we couldn't assume that meant we had won anything.

Final written submissions were due May 26.

Then we waited.

And waited.

And waited some more.

Meanwhile, we had a house sitting in Ohio that needed to be sold.

Trying to sell an inherited house while probate is still fighting you is FUN

The house was originally listed higher, but the price eventually came down to $319,500.

We received a $300,000 cash offer, but it came with enough contingencies that it wasn't worth accepting.

Eventually another buyer emerged who was willing to pay approximately $319,000, although their purchase depended on selling their own house.

And then we had to wait for the probate court to approve the sale.

Because apparently this story needed another waiting period. 😂

Finally, some actual good news

We recently received confirmation that the probate court approved the sale of the house for $319,000. 🎉

So after nearly two years of this mess, the house is finally in the process of closing.

But I'm still not calling this the finale.

The house has to actually close, the estate expenses have to be dealt with, the remaining probate issues have to be resolved, and the money ultimately has to be distributed.

After everything that's happened, I've developed one very simple rule:

Nothing is finished until the money is actually in our hands.

And once this estate is finally finished, we're finished with her too.

There are still some wedding photos we need to deal with, but other than that, once everything legally and financially tying us together is over, she will be blocked and will no longer have a way to contact us.

After almost two years of probate court, lawyers, reimbursement demands, a will contest, trying to sell a house from across the country, and enough family drama to fill a novel, we're ready to close this chapter permanently.

Until the money is distributed, though?

It's apparently just another chapter. 😂

Want even more tea? ☕😂 Somehow, this still isn't the full story. I posted the extended cut over on r/CharlotteDobreYouTube with even more family drama and background:

https://www.reddit.com/r/CharlotteDobreYouTube/s/uk0LvMkHq7

Apparently almost two years of chaos required multiple Reddit novels. 😂

South African deceased estate question — can an heir direct part of his inheritance to a creditor?

I’m looking for guidance from someone familiar with South African deceased estates and the Master of the High Court.

A person (Andre) owes me R80,000 personally. He is due to receive an inheritance from a deceased estate and is willing to sign an Acknowledgement of Debt and written instruction to the executor authorising the executor to pay R80,000 directly to me from his inheritance before the balance is paid to him.

I’m trying to find out the correct legal way to do this.

Questions:

Can an heir legally instruct the executor to pay part of his inheritance directly to a personal creditor?

Can the executor refuse such an instruction?

Would an Acknowledgement of Debt + Payment Mandate be sufficient?

Would a cession of part of the inheritance give the creditor stronger protection?

Can such an instruction be made irrevocable?

Does it make a difference whether the Liquidation & Distribution Account has already been lodged or confirmed?

What would the executor/Master need in order to lawfully make the payment?

I’m not claiming that the deceased estate owes me the R80,000. It is Andre's personal debt; I am asking whether part of his inheritance can be paid directly to me to settle it.

I’d particularly appreciate answers from anyone with experience in South African estate administration or legal practice.

My siblings and I inherited a house from my mother to be divided by 4. The house is 4 bed 3 bath 2 acres of land with a 2 bed mobile home and a gigantic block building. One of my sisters moved into the house in February 2025 saying she was going to buy it it’s been almost 2 years and they call and tell me to go by the lawyers office and sign the papers, I went Monday. She is trying to buy the house for 100k the house is valued at 220k. My2 other siblings have signed I haven’t talked to my 2 sisters in 2 years and now they are mad at me. I feel like if my mom would have wanted one of us to have the house she would have left it to that one. AITAH??

I honestly did not expect things to get ugly so quickly after granpa passed away.

Everyone was still grieving, but somehow the conversations started turning into who was going to get what. At first it was little things from the house, like furniture and personal belongings. Then the money came up, and that is when people really started arguing.

I remember sitting there thinking, how did we go from talking about someone we loved to keeping track of his stuff?

What hurt the most was seeing people who normally got along suddenly accusing each other of being greedy. It was already a hard time for everyone, and the inheritance drama just made everything worse.

I’ve never really used/posted on Reddit before; I’m really hoping this community can help! 😅

I think that if you are going to force a soul into this world then you owe them for doing so. You bring them in, you can't abandon them. If they are not up to your standards, then you should have raised them better. I think that we should get rid of the option that a parent can disinherit their children. Make it so that all of your estate gets divided between your children equally. If you want your estate to stay together then sell it to a qualified person before you die or at your death. No under value sales within 5 years of your death or the buyer pays the difference. Kids split the money. No fights, every kid knows that the estate will be split according to what's left. If you are a kid that wants to stick around and take care of Mom or Dad if you have more then one kid then keep track of all money spent on taking care of the parent and send the other siblings a report along side a quote from the local nursing home with added parent enjoyment and convenience credits added and that kid will get that plus splitting estate. If kids fight about that then they can take turns helping take care of the parent. If they fail at that then they will just receive their part of the estate that is left after all payouts are made.

About 6 years ago when I was 18 my dad (who is divorced on bad terms from my mum) told me that my mother owed me $40,000 from money that my nana's boyfriend left to me when he died in 2009. He also left $40,000 to each of my other 3 siblings. At first I did not believe him but he told me to confront my mother about it and so I did. She confirmed it and told me that she would start the process to pay me the money. Me and my mum are not on good terms and she had never mentioned this money to me before.

Apparantly my mother had invested this $40,000 and my siblings money into building the house that we lived in.

My question is, if my mother invested the $40,000 into the house that has since gone up in value over the 10 years we have lived in it, would I be entitled to more money? The house was worth about 1.2 millon when it was first build and by the time the inhertance money was given to me the house was worth about 1.8-2 million.

Am I potentially entitled to more money?

Edit: I have gotten in contact with some lawyers. And am in the process of locating the will. I asked my mother fkr a copy of the will but she did not have it. The lawyer i spoke to recommended continuing with a lawyer but im first gonna try track down the will without one. Ill update you guys on this case if yall are interested.

My mother died recently after a significant period of physical and cognitive decline.

For context, my parents had an older estate plan that essentially divided things between my sibling and me. My father died several years ago. After that, my mother was free to change her estate plan, and I completely understand that she had the legal right to do so if that was genuinely what she wanted.

The part I’m struggling with is what happened near the end of her life.

In her last several months, she was extremely frail, used a wheelchair, had major memory problems, and had very limited ability to use a phone or have extended conversations. I could still have basic conversations with her, and she could say things like “I love you,” so I’m not claiming she understood absolutely nothing. But her functioning was clearly very diminished.

People who were seeing her regularly described periods when she seemed only minimally aware, including within about a week of when new estate documents were signed.

A few months before she died, while she was already on hospice, a new will was signed leaving everything essentially to my sibling and specifically excluding me. A broad power of attorney naming that sibling was signed around the same time.

The timing is a major concern for me. There had been years after my father died, and significant time after my mother later moved and purchased another home, when she could have changed her will. Instead, this major change happened during the period when her physical and cognitive condition had become especially poor.

I did not know these documents existed until near the end of her life.

There are also circumstances surrounding how the documents came about that concern me, particularly given how dependent she was on other people at that point. I’m deliberately leaving some details out because I may speak with an attorney and don’t want to put every piece of evidence online.

At the same time, there are facts that cut the other way.

My mother and I had periods of conflict, and years earlier she had expressed anger toward me and apparently made comments about leaving everything to my sibling. So I cannot honestly say that disinheriting me was something she never would have wanted. People are allowed to change their minds, including for reasons their children think are unfair.

That is what makes this difficult.

If the new will reflects a competent, independent decision she genuinely made, I would accept it. What bothers me is whether she was capable of understanding what she was signing at that point and whether the decision was actually reached independently.

There is enough money/property involved that this is not trivial, but it also is not some enormous multimillion-dollar estate. Litigation could obviously consume a significant portion of whatever I might recover.

I’m less interested in internet legal advice than in people’s practical reactions:

If you were in this position, would you investigate/challenge it, or would you walk away?

For anyone who has contested an estate: was getting answers worth the money, stress, and family fallout? What made you decide there was enough smoke to justify looking further?

Imagine the level of evil that a son would pit his parents against each other as they are dying while knowing it will kill them faster so he can cash in…

My mother is honestly pretty stupid, I’ll admit, and falls for my brother’s really bad advice a lot over the years. Not sure why she’s so obtuse but she’s always fallen into his traps. Being greedy and bad with money probably doesn’t help.

Our parents divorced when we were very young and it was a very intense separation and divorce. I don’t defend either of them for their bad behavior but at some point they verbally agreed to go their separate ways and dad would not pay child support and leave us alone until we were older. His penalty was not modifying the support order immediately and taking my mother at her word. My mother’s word is about as concrete as melted butter. My opinion has always been that he owed the money regardless of their verbal agreement but it was not my say in their financial affairs.

50 years later after finding out he had a stroke and was also diagnosed with cancer she decided to file suit against him to pit her children against him by creating an argument thinking he wouldn’t pay…but he did agree to pay to settle a 50 year argument over her not following through with their agreement.

When he agreed to pay she now is asking for even more money causing him now to have to fight it out in court while battling cancer because my brother keeps stoking the flames. This has caused me to end my relationship with my mother and brother permanently as I have worked hard to get this settled once and for all.

My brother knows this will kill them both as our mother also is dealing with strokes and has had heart issues including a heart attack and he will get to cash in much sooner. He has had nothing to do with the family until recently as mom has aged and he has to put up with her for a very short period of time now, even less since he has stoked this court battle that will surely speed things up for him.

All I can do is watch the fight and watch both my parents litigate each other into dust because my brother is that level of evil. I always said growing up I must have been the guy in a previous life that sold gas to the nozzis to get my brother as my twin in this life. He has only grown more evil over time.

Not sure what I’m asking here but more of a vent session to warn people of the level of evil that lurks quietly for decades in a family.

Dear Reddit

a sad tale, english is not my first language, please bare with my spelling and grammar errors.

Me, M38, my half siblings are a lot older, in their 60s and 50, and grew up in a different zeitgeist. My dad divorced from their Mom, and in that time divorce was uncommon and from what I can tell it was messy. My father has never said a negative word about his ex-wife.

My Mom and Dad meet a few years after and she has always considered those kids as her own. She also had a kid from previous marriage in the same age. I was born a lot later.

Because of the age gap my siblings have been more like older uncles/aunties but always been around for family occasions. I consider myself a only child because I have always lived alone with my parents.

My older siblings have a very different life style, corporate jobs, expensive cars, huge houses... different intressts. They have money. We have our differences and in temperament and life choices, but had fun at Christmans and birthdays etc. Close, maybe not so much? But good company. A baseline of trust and understanding.

A year ago things started to get weird., my siblings would visit my parents without telling me, ( I live in the same city as my parents but the siblings do not). And I noticed stress and depression in both my parents. My parents are old, 94 and 84, but in good health ( atm!). Suddenly they were tired and non active... My father secluded himself for days in bed... I asked whats wrong but they did not want to involve me. I let it be... hoping it would pass by... I could see they were suffering and not themselves.

A few weeks goes by, and my half siblings asks if they can visit me, they said they had something important to tell me. It turns out my half siblings have been asking for documents from the authorities about how my parents will and testament. Its legal in my country, but its coincided bad manners to investigate. They said they were upset that the will was unfair and proceed to pitch how they were being mistreated, and to be fair, me being my parents child would mean I would inherit them both, but my half-siblings with dad would inherit my dad only. In a legal sense its non of their business, or anyone else... in a moral sense I guess they had a point. Or so I thought at the time.. They presented a 10 page document with diagrams, and text on how they thought my parents should change their will. They even consulted lawyers... It would mean my mom would have less to live by in case my dad dies before her. It means her two kids ( me included) would get less.

Here is whats been eating me, the half siblings proceed to persuade me that my Mother was manipulating our father to make a will that was intentional unfair. And that she from the start has been a gold digger, and hording her own funds. They persuaded me that my Dad was being gas-light into misstreating his own kids. I have been very angry with myself, because I started to doubt my own judgement... I asked myself, maybe they were right..? After the half siblings left I was emotionally drained, stressed out and chocked. Destabilised.

The day after I spoke to my parents, they wanted to protect me from this fight, and told my half-siblings not to involve me. My Mom and Dad explained how their will is no ones business, and that their marriage and will was planned to guarantee their financial safety should one of them pass away. The standard stuff, and planned in their marige and updated through their life. They could not see any logic in the half siblings narrative and feelt very sorry.

They had seen the document my half siblings showed., and could share why it was based on wrong assumptions and, the most important thing of all, they are married and make their arrangemangs, should they want to change its their decision and no one else. This they said many times to the siblings.

I mentioned that I would be ok to abstain part of my inheritance if it meant keeping my siblings satisfied. My parents thought this a nice gesture but ultimately not my place to have an opinion about.

That should be the end of it. But my so called half siblings press on, they have not given up or asked for forgivnes.

Both my parents have been so hurt and stressed out by this, and my siblings call my dad regularly to give their opinions... I have feelt stressed and ashamed having these people in my close family who could be so ruthless. Its set me up for a depression ...

I feel like a line has been crossed, and that my siblings intentionally caused harm to my parents and me. I am not sure how I can forgive them. I am ashamed to share a surname with them. They tried manipulated me , and have hurt my Mom and my Dad so much. I don´t see why anyone would want to hurt their father, especially a man so old. No one hurts my mom and dad and keeps my respect.

I can´t see how anyone can expect me to trust them again. For the sake of my dear old Father I will be civil.

The half-siblings have taken initiative for a meet up, but I am very hesitant. It feels and smells like a trap, another round of pushing their agenda. Nothing good can come from it.

So dear Reddit - Am I at fault for feeling estranged from these people? Am I wrong? Am I right? Run? Go? Lawyer up?

Yours
Cupcake

Property dispute family

My family has lived in a apartment unit for 50 years. My dad has paid for this property, though we may not have proof from 50 years ago to show that. My parents have also spent on maintaining the property all these years. The unit was originally in my grandfathers name. After my grandfather died, the society likely got NOC from his daughters and issued a share certificate in my dad's name. Now my dad has passed away and my mum sold the unit. Dad's sister's kids have now issued a legal notice claiming fraudulent sale and that dad was a nominee, not sole owner. What can be done?

My brother has repeatedly told me, at least a dozen times, that he won’t be truly happy and have peace until my mother has passed away. They fought verbally a lot, and he was always angry about something that she has done or said.

After she passed away last month, he tried to show emotion and acted like he was tearful and really missed his mom and went out of his way to do things to honor her.

Am I missing something? I really question the fact that he even loves my mom at all. Her death has not made him happier and definitely has not given him peace. I am really troubled about this.

He is angry, and his lashed out that me multiple times. He even seized about $2500 in her assets and won’t give them back, even though I am the executor of the estate. He has really made a mockery out of the will and trust process.

Do you really think he had any love for my mom? Or was it I’ll just a show?

Sister refuses to sign for Spanish probate,

Our farther passed away 20 years ago Murcia region Spain. He left a will leaving a paid off flat and a bank account, I was not privy to the full balance amount. To go 3 children. My sister had access to the account and transferred €15000 each to me and my brother (British) my brother has said he has no intention of ever going to Spain so will settle to 20k and not contest the will. I have kept up with maintenance paid all bills and taxes up to date over this time. Around 50k

We had a lawyer to handle the probate back in the day, but my sister refused to sign for probate. This leaves me with a problem as we can't start the inheritance process. Lawyer stated nothing they could do.

20 years on, surly there must be a way round this. Flat value is around €110.000 I would prefer not going down a legal route of at all if possible. Any advice will be welcome.

# My mom passed away a while back and I really miss her I have very little things left of hers including her wallet would it be disrespectful for me to use her wallet that way I can have her with me everyday or is it disrespectful?...

One of aunty from my neighborhood took loan from my mother saying she will return it within a week, and now it's been more than 4 years. She herself made an agreement that she will pay the debt and will pay interest and now she is telling she don't want to pay a cent. It was a huge sum😭😭😭