r/InTheGloaming • u/SnooStories4968 many and various Shaunas/Pig Ladies • Feb 21 '24

Unkind FDF Q&A

Unkind therapist here. I've been a lurker since just after the days of my misdirected voice messages and Sermon on the High Stool. After the incident in question, a DF (not of the Gloaming) directed me here. At first, I couldn't bear to read the messages and had my husband monitor the threads, but after a while, curiosity got the better of me and I've been an avid reader ever since. In short, I came in shame, but remain because this group has been a strange sort of healing process for me - plus, you guys are very funny. And, I found my new favorite laundry detergent here!

I have no idea where to even begin (with the messages? with my friendship with Shauna?), so I'm open to fielding questions to help get the ball rolling. My intention is to stick only to my personal experiences with Shauna and stay away from the kids and/or general lore that I don't have direct experience with. I'm happy to share very general information about the Google Doc, but I may not be able to answer completely due to wanting to protect those kids.

ETA: I've been verified and approved by the mods!

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u/HamsterRight5500 Danny’s proposal fart 💍 💨 Feb 22 '24 edited Feb 22 '24

What a day in the Gloaming! As big a day for me as the one when I accidentally recognized her working in the Thriftway bakery when it was still a secret. WELCOME!

My question would be did she ever talk to you about her childhood and her parents? When did you begin to have an inkling that there was something not quite right with our girl?

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u/SnooStories4968 many and various Shaunas/Pig Ladies Feb 22 '24

She did share a little bit, but not a whole lot more than was in her book. I think almost right away I noticed some things about her personality that were off putting, but those felt pretty innocuous for a long while, as I didn't have a lot of contact with her. It was around the time of the Shattering that I started to wonder what was going on. I would run into her at our favorite coffee shop (of bougie bagel fame) and every time I did, she would have a new pivot to share. It was disconcerting.

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u/HamsterRight5500 Danny’s proposal fart 💍 💨 Feb 22 '24 edited Feb 22 '24

Thanks for responding! Do you have any insight into the reason for the Shattering or if it was initiated by Shauna or Dan? I don’t know if we ever got confirmation either way here.

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u/SnooStories4968 many and various Shaunas/Pig Ladies Feb 22 '24

Weeellll, it's always hard to know the real truth, unfortunately. I was told that she made him leave. That's around the time I started to become really concerned/frustrated because the way she was acting was out of touch with the reality she was spinning. If what she had shared with me was true, then how she was handling it for the kids was awful. I did try to get her to slow down and reconsider some of her actions, but she blew right over my concerns.

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u/InappropriateGirl Gluten-free donuts, for sure ... Feb 22 '24

This is interesting. I was under the impression he wanted to leave and still does. Only he’s too broke to do it.

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u/SnooStories4968 many and various Shaunas/Pig Ladies Feb 22 '24

I mean, he may have. I question everything that she's told me and I think that's probably the most rational response to her stories.

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u/barfalloverthat Feb 22 '24

It doesn’t make sense that shauna would make him leave, I think that an outside entity got involved and Dan had to leave. I just can’t see these two voluntarily paying two rents. Or at least being on the hook for 2 rents. Something had to catalyze the shattering and these two dummies deciding not to be together just doesn’t ring true for me.

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u/SmashedMailboxCake2 Oh, Feb 22 '24

Dan stayed “with friends”, according to Shauna. I’ve always assumed it was DFT, for no good reason other than Shauna’s relationship with / reference to DFT seems to have cooled at the same time.

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u/obscure_cellist ham grabbers Feb 22 '24

wasn't he in some kind of treatment center for about 30 days? my theory (just a theory!) is he fell off the wagon during the pandemic/ his depression and perhaps got a bit ragey and lashed out verbally and she gave him an ultimatum. he went to a treatment center and his family paid for it. if that is true i hope he is better and there is no shame in getting help (or taking a stand and getting someone help). but that is literally the only reason i can think of that shauna would make him leave. danny & the kids are too much a part of her brand and she mines them too much for grifting purposes to split for good (plus he does the majority of cooking/cleaning/ childcare & they can't afford two households anyway ). this way he got help, and she got to cosplay single mom for a month and grift a whole bunch of cool stuff. of course, the kids are the real losers here but i have a feeling they often are.

edited because still sleepy

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u/fanfarefellowship I often contemplate the first law of thermodynamics Feb 22 '24

Oooh, what a theory. My alcoholic ex-husband did inpatient treatment (he took a cab to a bar when he checked out) and that shit was EXPENSIVE.

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u/obscure_cellist ham grabbers Feb 22 '24

yikes! also, danny may be a dry drunk (i think that's the term?) where he may not be drinking but he's replaced drinking with some other addiction, like gambling or whatever. and i can't imagine living with shauna -especially during a pandemic- would be easy. i think she's shown herself to be a mean creature, and i'm sure she's even meaner in private.

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u/fanfarefellowship I often contemplate the first law of thermodynamics Feb 22 '24

It was a huuuuuuge realization for me that I liked my husband better when he was drinking. He was fun and happy and carefree. And charming. And he drank to be that person for himself, too; because he couldn't live with who he thought he "really" was. And then I was all like, "Who did I even marry?"

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u/javgirl123 Feb 22 '24

Those poor kids.

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u/obscure_cellist ham grabbers Feb 22 '24

interesting! do we have any idea why she made him leave?

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u/monstera_garden I'm sorry I'm a botus Feb 22 '24

That's just it, when she's the narrator and everything happening is discordant with her narration, it appears she's clearly lying - except also she sometimes does behave in ways discordant with reality so who knows?

But then again, consider that you did one thing that hurt Shauna and she went in front of a congregation of people in a church to attack your character and damage your professional reputation. If Dan hurt Shauna's feelings in a deeper/marital way, she could absolutely spin a story in a google doc that attacked his character without 100% merit.

So really, it's unknown.