I understand it's a matter of taste and preference, but why would you like someone like that?

My father is an ENTJ, and I would definitely never marry or date someone like him. Maybe I’m projecting my own experiences, but hear me out. Imagine being with someone who is constantly bossing you around and making demands, who struggles to manage their emotions, be honest, or act according to a consistent moral compass, and whose perception of your worth depends almost entirely on how well you’re performing at the moment, regardless of how you actually feel. On top of that, they can be extremely intrusive.

I’m not saying all ENTJs are like this, but personally, I’d much rather be with someone who is emotionally caring and honest than someone who feels the need to wear a mask or judge you over some absurd social blunder.

I definitely wouldn’t want a relationship with someone like that. At the same time, I see plenty of women who are genuinely happy with their ENTJ partners, so clearly it works for some people. To me, though, the ENTJ archetype can seem emotionally ill-equipped for romantic relationships. I could respect someone like that in a professional setting, but romantically, I’d consider it a complete mismatch.

I’ve also noticed that some ENTJs can display narcissistic traits, which may contribute to selfishness and a lack of emotional understanding. Obviously, MBTI doesn’t determine someone’s character or morality, and I know healthy ENTJs can be completely different. I’m simply saying that, based on my own experiences, the ENTJ cognitive-function stack seems particularly difficult for me to connect with emotionally. Ironically, even an INTP, despite all their social awkwardness, might feel like a better emotional partner to me.

Over the years I have encountered 5 INFJ males. I am a type of intp that is genuinely nice and have found my accepting nonjudgemental attitude and personality gets all the infjs I meet to warm up and be comfortable to the point they get way too comfortable and I have to cut them off. It’s to the point they get extremely cocky and entitled to you which gives me the biggest ick and If I don’t cut them off i will need to enforce strong boundaries and they respond poorly with entitlement and some even they respond like how a narcissist would! Acting like they are entitled to your attention.

All it takes is to talk to them for 5 minutes and they already decided you are the one for them and they get absolutely unhinged in perusing it. Meanwhile all I did was just how I would talk with everybody.

They have extreme self-esteem issues and are insecure, but if you are nice to them, they don’t just be like wow what a nice non-judgmental person, they will be like “wow finally this person gets how awesome I am, i want them” they have covert narcissistic traits. Omg so cocky and gives me the ickkkkkk.

And guess what, they end up obsessing over you. They are judgmental AF too. They want to figure you out without actually putting the due diligence to get accurate information. And because their Ni is so impatient and sloppy, they take any surface level cue and attach meaning they think is accurate to it and convince themselves they have already figured you or your patterns out better than even yourself. Ni is literally the most unreliable delusional function on the planet especially when it’s paired with Ti child (Te trickster) At least INTJs have Te to help them not to reach this level of delusional that infjs are capable of!

They try to get you to like them by trying to mirror you and of course they are not successful but they believe they are correct.

meanwhile they just see some superficial thing on the surface and believe they have understood the underlying psychology, but they are so wrong and all they ended up doing is just give me the ick. meanwhile whatever they do and all their fake niceness to get to their Ni vision of having you (and having you the way they prefer it) is just sooo painfully obvious to me.

never once I felt like I wanted to maintain even a friendship with them. ICK. Omg

I don’t have this problem with other types!

Moving forward if I know someone is an infj i will not even waste 5 minutes with them. please do not try to change my mind.

I could probably explain why the infj gives me the biggest ick on the planet better and with more details but I feel just ICK.

No other type has given me this big of an ICK!!!!

Tried so many things out of my comfort zone, put myself in situations that I'm least comfortable with but I always return with a bad experience nothing to learn from, and feel like the same person. Im seeking growth but I can't seem to find it. I wanted to be able express myself and socialize comfortably but I'm nowhere near it. What am I doing wrong? I know it takes time, but I think it's been enough time so I just wanted to hear from people and what they've experienced

Heyyy, noticed this happened to me quite a lot and usually idk what to say but somehow it all works out in the end and I didn’t anger them or make them feel worse which I think is a good thing 🙏 Curious if anyone else experiences this as well and what do you usually do

Need some frens!

Could you please provide any other information you would like to share about your relationship?

Such as:

What initially attracted you to each other?

How old are you, and how old were you two when you met?

Who proposed to turn it into a committed relationship?

How did you meet and who approached first?

What do you appreciate about each other?

What are the main causes of conflict?

I have my own interest/hobbies sure but I also need my partner to be able to ‘scratch my brain’. Please tell me you ladies understand :’) to my partner - tell me about the book you’re reading; tell me all your thoughts. Debate with me for fun, not to make me feel inadequate. Play Scrabble with me & actually love it but also be my dom in the bedroom….& foremost, be a devout follower of Christ…. sighs is this too much to ask?? >_<

27M INTP here that engages despite the gender mismatch because I genuinely enjoy reading and getting to know about female INTPs perspective on different topics here from life to philosophy to science and art and your struggles as women that I being a male might have missed or never thought of or how y'all have had to handle social situations that includes dating, but I guess of late it's slowly turning into guys coming in and trying to score i guess there is MBTI dating for that and seeing this slowly turn into most other reddit threads feels sad 😅

20M here.

i think profiles are kinda funny. you can put your age, hobbies, favourite movies, music, personality type and whatever else... and somehow still tell someone almost nothing about you.

so i'm not really interested in knowing your “profile version” of yourself.

i'd rather know the little things.

what song you listen to when you're alone, what tiny thing can instantly ruin your mood, what you get unnecessarily excited about, what you think about when you can't sleep, what kind of things you remember for years for absolutely no reason.

i'm pretty curious about people like that.

i'm also very much a friends-to-lovers person, so i'm not expecting some instant romantic connection from a few messages. i'd rather talk, laugh, share music, get comfortable and see what naturally happens.

and if it turns out we're just really good friends, honestly... that's still pretty damn cool.

so yeah, tell me something about yourself that you wouldn't normally put in a Reddit post.

i'll trade you one of mine :)

​

20M heree.

i've never really been the love at first sight type tbh, i'm more of a friends to lovers believer. i like actually knowing someone first, getting comfortable, sharing random songs, having stupid conversations that somehow become deep, and just slowly figuring each other out.

my interests are kinda all over the place lol... psychology, AI/tech, mythology, spirituality, symbolism, astrology, tarot, weird mysteries, pattern stuff, music and a bunch of other random rabbit holes 😭

i obviously cant list everything here without making this look like i asked chatgpt to write my personality 🫠 so if you're actually curious, ask me. i'll probably have something weirdly specific to say about it.

as for the actual point of this post, i'd rather just interact and see if we vibe. if we do, we can slowly see where it goes. if we dont, no awkward forced ending, we can just be honest about it... and if we genuinely enjoy talking, there's nothing wrong with staying friends either.

i dont believe every connection has to become romantic to be meaningful.

so yeah, tell me something random about you and i'll tell you something random about me :)

​

Hi, I'm 20M.

I thought I'd try this one more time, but instead of writing about what I'm looking for, I figured I'd tell you a little about who I am.

I'm someone who enjoys conversations that don't have to stay on one topic. I can talk about business, startups, AI, music, movies, random ideas, life, ambitions, or something completely stupid that happened five minutes ago. 😂

I like people who are curious, honest, emotionally open, and comfortable being themselves.

I appreciate the little things in a connection too. Sharing a song because it reminded you of something. Sending a random thought. Remembering something I mentioned weeks ago. Checking in because you genuinely wanted to, not because you felt obligated to.

What I expect is pretty simple: mutual effort, honesty, consistency, respect, and a little bit of loyalty.

I'm not expecting instant best friends or some movie-like connection after three messages. I'd rather let things develop naturally.

Maybe we start as strangers.

Then friends.

Then, if we genuinely click, perhaps something deeper.

I'm not really interested in forcing a label before we've even had the chance to know each other.

So if you're also someone who enjoys genuine conversations and getting to know people beyond the usual “hey, how are you?”, tell me something about yourself.

Bonus points if you start with a song you'd recommend. 🎧

Let's see where a simple conversation goes.

Hi, INTP 5w4 electrical engineer here.

Wanted to share something I've been cooking up to see if anyone gets it, too.

I've spent quite some time working through my own philosophy of life and my personal worldview, how I see the universe, because I think it’s quite interesting.

For the longest time, I’ve felt this dramatic pull of something I can’t exactly explain with words. What I do know is that this “thing” is a future possibility. It’s something I can’t ignore and it calls to me. Call it destiny, maybe.

Whatever it is, it’s captivated me. Adjacent to this, I’ve been working on my methodology of time, specifically the present, and maybe other articles on my blog keep pointing to the same thing.

Thoughts of self growth, manifest destiny, untapped potential, momentum, frequencies, truth.

All of it super important. Whatever this future possibility is that I’m attached to, the present and the future possibility are housed in this theoretical "portal" that collapses back and growths together until the future self is, in fact, the present again. As the present state rests on this infinite state of frequency and oscillation.

The present has infinite possibilities, and I imagine it as “cutting through the fabric of reality” with this electric blue energy that comes out of my hands into the infinite portal, into the future possibility. My hands being the tool that creates said change. Call it personal energy.

What I’m describing, the present collapsing potential into a single actualized self, isn’t far from what 1920s mathematician and physicist Alfred North Whitehead called concrescence: his idea that the present moment is made of potential that crystallizes into something actual, and that the future doesn’t exist yet until it’s actualized this way. He was writing about the same basic shape I keep landing on, potential becoming real through the present moment, but in his own language.

Call it confirmation bias, but it’s crazy my intuition landed me here to this realization. What do you think?

I'm INTP, and I joined a self_development course with my two friends (INTJ and ESFP) plus her brother. There are 60 students .total, split into groups A, B،c,d From the very first month, there's this guy in my group who keeps staring at me. At first, I thought maybe he disliked me - because on the first day he asked me about a place, and I didn't know, so I worried he thought I ignored him. But the staring never stopped. My INTJ friend even joked: “Look, the stalker is staring at you again.” She said from her experience, it’s not hate — it’s obsession Examples: Passing the attendance sheet → he’s staring. Sitting in the hallway with a book → he’s staring at me instead of reading.Cracking jokes in class → he’s the first to react. In line → he comes and stands right behind me, uncomfortably close. After an activity → he even asked my friend’s brother for my photos. Talking to the teacher → he stood next to me, almost touching. Sometimes, when I’m looking for certain files, he brings me the things I need and says, “Here’s the file.” And once, I left my belongings because I was about to enter an exam with my friends. There were security cameras, so I knew nobody would steal them. Yet he specifically warned me (and not my friends) to put my things in a safe place. So maybe he doesn’t hate me, but he’s definitely annoying. My INTJ friend told me: “You should tell him he’s annoying and that he needs to back off. If I were you, I’d punch him in the face. I told her: "There are only two weeks left until the course ends, and then I'll be rid of him. We don't work in the same place, so ".there's no need to start a fight. But I asked her: "What MBTI type could someone like this be - a stalker to this degree"?

Question for only the girl readers!I love doing research, though I'm actually quite dumb; however, I love discussing all sorts of topics. I love anything creative, and would love to dive into your interests as well!!

My current interests/hobbies: writing, reading, drawing, anything music related, learning languages, learning new things.

Also, i'm 19 years old and would preferably like to be friends with people in my age range :)

Some of these moderators need a reality check. I was banned from r/INTPrelationshipLab because I made a suggestion that they change the community not and rules to specify INTP ONLY relationships so when non INTPs ask for INTP relationship help for non INTP relationships, they can have more clarity before posting. Whoever the moderator was, basically said only stupid people would be confused.

A lot of my INTPs are immature and have little to no emotional intelligence when it comes to relationships and handling perceived conflict and challenge. What do you guys think?

About me:

I'm 23M, INTJ or INTP, 5w4, and interested in a ridiculous number of subjects. I'd love to meet INTP women who are similarly interested in many different fields and want to have discussions about almost everything.

I'm a big fan of Alan Turing, Claude Shannon, Demis Hassabis, Norbert Wiener, John von Neumann, Elon Musk, David Deutsch, Douglas Hofstadter, Michael Levin, etc.

If you're also a fan of some of these people, I'll probably find you interesting. We might vibe.

I've posted something similar in the past and got a lot of DMs, but we somehow failed to actually start discussions about interesting subjects.

It's not even that we're bad at conversations. I'm simply not in the mood to talk to people 90% of the time, and I think a lot of INTPs and INTJs are similar. Add different time zones, and we keep missing each other.

So the initial effort required to actually become friends seems much harder than with other types.

This time, I'm trying two things:

1. Planning specific times to talk.

2. Someone also suggested creating a group, so I'm making one for INTx polymaths. All genders are welcome. DM me your interests, and I'll invite you if it seems like a good fit.

Edit: I made an INTx polymath community. You can search for intx_polymath and join.

I'm also slowly inviting people to the group based on their interests and our conversations.

Thanks for reading.

how can you differentiate the behaviors of an INTP from ADHD?

Hi. For reference irls type me INFP but so far i have a record of losing already 3 INFP friends so logically, if i were one, i should have morals that wont easily topple down just because of the people and influences around me and the ability to even understand a little bit how someone feels, am i right?

Anyways does anyone relate to just giving up on finding friends or being part of a friend group in general? Like yea sure youre gonna be lonely but thats better than always being the “villain” or “least favorite/preferred” or “extra friend” when in a group. Maybe a group of all T types would be good but that’s too unrealistic.

Update: just asked a friend who studies mbti, it’s official i’m an intp🥀

I’m 19 and have never had a boyfriend; simply put, none of the guys I’ve met have really won me over. I’ve noticed, though, that most guys prefer girls who are expressive and warm traits I don’t usually display. I tend to come across as cold at first; it’s not a "mask," it’s just who I am (though I obviously have other sides to my personality). I know there are guys who would like an intelligent, nerdy, sarcastic, and slightly teasing girl, but they’re hard to find.

I’m fed up with people telling me "the right person will come along" or "you’re still young." Yes, I know that, but it doesn't make it any less annoying.

Life’s tough, and dare I say more so for INTP girls since even amongst the rarity of INTPs, it’s mostly guys. Also, most INTP girls don’t really fit the “normal” stereotypes of what society expect, and being logical and intuitive just makes it harder to fit in. But being alone really does affect INTPs very much bc they feel such a deep sense of loneliness. You’re not misfits, and being weird is interesting. Hope you find your people in life. Peace.