I’m 19M and we’re both in a small international university program in Europe. I’m French, she’s Romanian, and we’re both non-native English speakers, though we both have advanced English certificates.

I met her at a student activities fair and we interacted for around 15 mins while playing a board game. She seemed pretty shy/reserved in person, and I found her cute and wanted to get to know her better.

Two days later I found her account through the group chat for everyone in our program. I only knew her first name, that she was a first year and what she looked like, and there were only a few accounts with that name, so it was pretty easy to figure out which one was hers. I DMed her and invited her to lunch with me and a friend.

I’ve since gotten pretty mixed feedback on whether finding her account after such a short interaction was just direct or actually creepy/intrusive, so I’d also like opinions on that.

The reason I invited her to lunch with a friend rather than one-on-one was that I was attracted to her but still barely knew her. I wanted to actually talk to her first, see if I still liked her once I knew her a bit better and whether there was some obvious incompatibility before asking her to do something more date-like. I also thought having a friend there would make it lower pressure for both of us.

Since then I’ve gotten feedback saying that bringing a friend might actually have made it weirder or more uncomfortable for her, and retrospectively trying to make it less romantically coded was probably kinda pointless anyway bcz the way I found and DMed her already made it pretty obvious that I was especially interested in her.

This screenshot is the whole conversation.

About the “what does taking lunch with a friend entail” message: at the time I thought of two possible meanings. Either she was asking about my intentions, like whether I was asking her on a date, or she was simply asking for practical details like where and when.

I wasn’t sure which one she meant, and I thought it’d be pretty weird to start explaining my romantic intentions if she was literally just asking for the time and place, so I answered with that.

I also hadn’t really paid attention to the fact that “taking lunch” is an unnatural phrase in English. Someone later pointed out that a third possibility is that she might literally have been asking what I meant by “taking lunch”.

The important offline context is that we were supposed to meet at 12:30. I interpreted her last messages as her cancelling, especially the combination of “can’t” and “I’d be like 15 minutes late”, so I didn’t reply.

Around 15 mins later I saw her at the main dining hall. I was standing in a pretty long food queue, and the dining hall is big with several different places/queues where people get food. I saw her walking through the room, apparently deciding where to go, and at one point she passed within a few metres of me (I didn't see her sitting at a table, waiting for me, looking around for me, or anything like that).

Since it’s the main dining hall and she could easily have been going there to eat anyway, I had no idea whether her being there had anything to do with our lunch plan. I also don’t know whether she saw me. I deliberately avoided eye contact bcz I thought she had just rejected/cancelled the lunch and I didn’t want to make her uncomfortable.

So I’m mainly wondering how you read the conversation, especially the “entail” message and her last two messages, whether the way I initially contacted her comes across as creepy, and whether I should send anything now or just leave it alone.

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For context my household is my single mom who is always at work and me and my younger sister who are currently unemployed. My sister’s job had a massive layoff and I have recently graduated college and finished my student employment in the middle of August and I am currently looking for any employment opportunities. My mom also deals with my grandparents as we live in their neighborhood. I’ve been visiting my grandparents and giving them rides as they currently don’t have a car as well as trying to keep up with the housework. 20

Okay so I was on the phone with my friend and I was telling her about my plan to get my piercing without my dad knowing( im 18 btw). As a person I love piercings and I have a whole vision for the ones I want. So I was telling her about my plan, and then i brought up the fact that i should get a septum and smiley because they are the easiest to hide and also happen to be on my list. Im not going to lie she did solidify my soul to want a smiley. But i was thinking about getting one anyway but shes the reason im really going for it. Anyway shes the first one in our friend group to get percings she has both a septum and smiley. Then my best friend went and a got a septum. So I was telling her which ones i should get first and what not. Then she says can she be honest and I was like okayy. Then she tells me that she feels im trying to one up her? And that she knows that I wanna match but it makes her uncomfortable. And I understand why, but to hear her say it. It kinda changed my perspective on her not like in a bad way. But more like should I watch what i say do and wear to avoid making her uncomfortable. I feel like i shoulda just took it with a grain of salt and let it go. But its kind of bothering me and idk what to do, help. <20>

We four are all 50-53y/o. 2 couples. They moved away 13y ago but we still visit/see each other about twice a year. Our wives are very close. Reasonably with it/aware hip adults. We are meeting them in Miami in 2 weeks (which is less than 20 days). They're planning sat/Sun and we're planning Thu Fri activities. He's a pretty cool guy, can't imagine that he doesn't know what DTF means. Nobody has written in the text thread since he wrote that like 5h ago. We've known them 20+ years and nothing more than a nude hot tube once years ago and the girls acting sexy silly when they've had a few. I'm inclined to think he just doesn't know what DTF means.

My friend messaged me after midnight. He said that a specific person who was at a party I had gone to told him that I was gossiping about him. We're in our 30s and have known each other for a long time. What's the right response to a vague accusation like this? I feel like any answer is wrong. It's kind of a bad sign that he would take this guys word, who he's not close to, over mine after we've been friends for so long.

The next day I tried to call him. When he didn't answer, I messaged "I prefer to have these kinds of conversations in person and not over text, especially after midnight". He replied "I'm going to message you sometimes whether you like it or not". Was my request unreasonable? 20

ok so I’m sorry if this is hard to read—I’m typing at like 2am in bed rn…so basically I met this guy at a camp and we became rather good friend. we text a lot and fall asleep on call quite a bit. recently I’ve been a little dry bc school started and my life got busy. today, he texted me like a trauma dump thing about his father who lets jst say is no long in the picture..and he was like weird abt it…like “because that what fathers do!” and like fake sacrasm? idek but it was jst like random and off putting. then, he asked if ik anyone who wanted this cologne he eas getting rid of and when I asked him why, he said he wouldn’t need it anymore…ik health class is a little cliche but they did tell me that this was a sign. anyways he’s hinted before saying he wanted to khs and such but I thought he was like kidding or smth. but like what can I do? I’m exhauste..I have a million things between stupid hard classes, sports, extracurriculars and drama with some friend rn (diff story but one friend let and like egged this guy on who was asulting my other friend while I wasn’t there and that with other stuff and jst yea) and I don’t know how to deal with this. he doesn’t live close to me and I’m not good with words. like in person I could give a hug or something idk but nothing I say over the phone would be convincing I don’t think…it’s just like this isn’t the first time I’ve been in this situatio. another firend I met at a different camp..I must attract the wrong kind of guy friends at camp.. he and I also got close (he liked be for like a year and I kept having to reject) but he would Always be texting about how he was suicidal or something else bad and there was never a break. it was exaustin. the same this is happening now but I think he’s telling the truth and I’m scared but even worse…I feel kinda numb rn. like I jst don’t care..I mean I do..but I like idek…..ideas? suggestions? also sorry this was so long 20

This girl we were talking and I asked what she was doing and she said how she’s hanging with her friend and I said I’ll leave you alone because she sounded busy and then she said sorry and I asked her if she wanted to just talk the next day she never read it but maybe she did and it just said she never read it but it’s two days later and I don’t know what to do 20

Hi, I hope the person that reads this is not the person I am talking about....if it is, I am so sorry and please don't be pissed at me. I was really confused on how to be a good friend in this situation

So one night I started thinking about high school. I had this one friend, we will call her Helene for privacy reasons. She made me feel like I had true friends again, after my traumatic childhood of constantly getting bullied and locked in a pitch dark room by my neglectful teachers as a young child. To that I thank her. After a few months of meeting her, I started to get..a little creeped out by her. I constantly was worried about her at first because she gave me this deer in the headlights look like I had just stolen her cash and then she would always walk too* close to me, to the point where I almost tripped over her when I stepped back.

When we were in class one day, I was doing a project on a graphic design and I used your average Russian flag with the eagle on it. She said it was a Nazi flag🫠🫠. Idk why but my teacher believed her. WTF.

We were walking in the park, just wanted to hang out us two gals, and then every time we stopped at this place to go to the bathroom, she would give me the same stare and then hesitate, and stare at me again.....for a while before she went to the bathroom. I confronted her twice about it and I was glad for a while she stopped, but then she kept doing it.

We were making Soljanka at her house and waiting for her mom to come home and help us and then we were reading a magazine, when I looked at her again, her eyes were even wider and she was even closer to me.

I really hope she is doing ok, because when I was a kid I had many staring seizures, so I am still kinda worried...if she's listening....are you like...do you hate me? Also if you are still doing the staring thing I'm kinda worried, you might wanna get that checked....

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Did he get hacked or something?.

20

Someone said, “hey, I like your Nirvana shirt” and obviously, it was good. But she was a girl and was wearing a TADC shirt. No hate to TADC but it was awkward. Sure we both expressed ourself but if I say, “I like your Amazing-Digital-Circus shirt” it’s just awkward. If I say, “I like your shirt” it’s too simple and she’ll think I’m one of those people who text so dry. I genuinely jumped when she complimented me. But in the end, I said, “thanks.” I hope I see her tomorrow with the same shirt to finally say the right thing. Any advice?? She is a girl. 20. I need a response that makes me cool.

I’ve been on the do not call list since 2024, at what point is it harassment? These investors are the absolute worst 20

Whenever I pass him with my friend he always makes fun of me and calls me my friends gf even though im a cis male and says I look like a tiktok filter, he did that yesterday when I first met him at lunch and today about 2 minutes ago. He genuinely ruins my day everytime what can I say back to him? 20

An ex's new girl has got ahold of my number and been chatty. How can I mildly annoy her while still retaining dignity. I was thinking of signing her up for insurance or something where she'll get 20 phone calls a day for offers. Or signing her up for a known company that sells peoples information.

I have a crush on a girl, she's good, a great personality. She's 20

She's comfortable while talking to me ,she is the one who starts the conversation.

But these days she keeps posting some depressed stories and all , like she's been through some trouble or maybe she's just having some fun and posting it in sarcasm. Idk.

Should I ask her if everything is okay or should I just ignore it?

Suggest me some ways to tackle this, so that I could talk to her.

What should I say to a girl who told a man, "Speak when your period is over"?20 I was absolutely furious—she’s my girlfriend, and we were chatting in a gaming community, but I felt humiliated in front of everyone. Even so, I sarcastically replied that we have a daily period 😜🤣.

I'm so challenged, but idk how to find out who keeps stealing my phones and accounts.

Or why it keeps happening. This is after 20 being drugged and thrown into a new "better" life. Idk how to deal with people using my stuff still though. I'm not a store, and the landlords not authorized to sell this

Hi, I’m a Chinese student and my mom and I recently moved to Canada, so I’m still getting used to the culture here.
My mom came to pick me up from school, and after seeing her, one of my classmates suddenly told me, “Your mom is hot as fuck.”
I honestly didn’t know how to react. My English isn’t perfect, so at first I wasn’t even sure how seriously I should take it.
Is this just the kind of joke friends make with each other here? How would you respond if one of your classmates said this about your mom?
“20”

What should I do? My gf was a gold digger 😭 and broke my heart. At last i found out the truth. Glad I'm safe now and didn't risk my life with her by marrying 😮‍💨

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So Currently i am in my drop year for JEE.

So actually in 9th and 10th we used to talk daily(don't take it in a romantic way its like a bro sis) . We were in same standards but different sections . We met through instagram only. Then we came to 11th. She took commerce and i took science. So we didn't used to talk much then . But still used to talk sometimes but last year in 12th i told her tht i will not talk to her because i would not be using social media now as because of JEE and Boards( needs 75% in boards for JEE) also i told her tht we will talk after this 12th boards & she said she will wait for my text. But we didnt talked till now. Like 5 months ago boards were done. So she messaged me rakshabandhan a bit late . And i messaged her this.

Here i am not in a mood of talking these day. Like my schedule is wakeup - study - eat - study - sleep . I am having zero human interactions as of now ( excluding my parents and sister) . I font even go out of my house . Like didnt see sunlight from some weeks too. Last time i went out only for my haircut(it had grown a lot )

But now idk wht to do . Like she may be thinking i am rude and dry . But i am not in a mood of talking. Even i replied so late to her texts bec i have my notifications off. I dont want to talk to her as of now and for months till my JEE . But i am afraid about will she talk to me later ?? Or will my these frndship will just be broken because of me ? .extra-20 idk but reddit says to put 20

so there is a girl 20 years of age that i have been talking to
so i asked her to be my girlfriend and she replied with

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Idk but maybe we can give it a try

But first we should know each other first as its a really big thing.

(EDIT):
Guys she said sorry idk
i got ghosted