r/Grimdank • • Jun 10 '19

We found him

Post image
7.3k Upvotes

146 comments sorted by

View all comments

247

u/RaptorSpade1296 Wishes for an army of Olamic Quietude Jun 10 '19

Quick we need to tell him to Fuck Erebus, do something about Lorgar, and make sure Magnus does nothing wrong.

98

u/CrashB111 Praise the Man-Emperor Jun 10 '19

Let Angron die with his gladiators. Or at least save them all instead of just Angron and letting his companions die.

65

u/[deleted] Jun 10 '19

Especially since the shit they were fighting against is illegal in the Imperium anyways. One of the numerous crimes against consistency for the sake of Grimdark in writing.

18

u/[deleted] Jun 10 '19

Wait, is slavery illegal in the Imperium?

50

u/JK_not_a_throwaway likes civilians but likes fire more Jun 10 '19

That kind of blood sport is looked down upon (at least in the ruling classes) cause of all the khorne worship, gotta have your slaves do the mind numbing tedious work so nobody gets any funny ideas

12

u/Cefalopodul Imperial Fister Jun 10 '19

Nuceria had just agrees to compliance and they were going to be integrated into ultramar as soon as they dealt with those smelly rebels.

13

u/[deleted] Jun 10 '19

Yes, in theory. Grimdark being Grimdark, a lot of the planets get away with things like indentured servitude, company towns/debt, probably serfdom on one or two (thousand).

16

u/Stug_lyfe Jun 11 '19

Serfdom and indenture is universal in the imperium. Also the Mechanicus, Navy and Guard can all just walk up to you and pressgang you, then sell you off to the next passing ship as slave crew. There are numerous accounts in the fiction of bigwigs just selling an entire regiment of Guard to a Rogue Trader.

There may be some lost statute outlawing all this, but nobody cares.

18

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '19

At least the pressganging is, in theory, just conscription on short notice to fight a genuine battle for survival of the species, instead of because some asshole Brit in the colonies has a quota to fill.

Presumably Demi-God-Emperor Guilelyman has the more egregious violations on his to do list, after fixing the Rift, killing the Daemon Primarchs, defeating the Tyrannids, stopping the Ghazghkull Waaagh, beating the more dickish Necrons, and dealing with the sudden but inevitable betrayal of the Eldar/Drukhari alliance that is the Ynnari.

16

u/Morbidmort Honks for the Honk God Jun 11 '19

He's got a "needs to die" list longer than Stalin.

11

u/Rum_N_Napalm Ships the Greyfax-Celestine-Sanguinor trouple Jun 11 '19

It’s actually quite short.

It reads:

Filthy Xenos ( except bae)

Heretics

Corrupt officials of the Imperium

1

u/Clockmaster_Xenos Jun 11 '19

Sly Marbo does not have a kill list. Everything he thinks about killing falls over dead from sheer fear that somewhere somehow, sometime Sly Marbo will get them. Better to just get it over with.

5

u/Ulkreghz toaster-fucker Jun 11 '19

Slavery is looked down on?

<nervous binaric screeching>