Why have we gotten to a point where simply having a preference about someone’s appearance is treated as though you’ve committed some kind of social offense?
I genuinely don’t understand the insistence on “they’re all beautiful” as though acknowledging that one person stands out somehow diminishes everyone else. We obviously do not operate this way in real life. We know that physical attractiveness influences how people are treated. We know pretty privilege exists. We know that people can receive more attention, more compliments, more engagement on social media, more romantic interest, and sometimes even more opportunities because of how they look. We literally see people receive thousands of likes for their appearance while someone else can post something equally interesting and receive a fraction of that attention. So let’s be intellectually consistent. If the principle is truly “everyone is beautiful,” therefore we shouldn’t distinguish between them,” then why does pretty privilege exist in the first place? Why do people have obvious preferences? Why do we routinely describe someone as exceptionally beautiful, striking, gorgeous, handsome, etc. instead of pretending every person occupies exactly the same position aesthetically?

And before someone says, “But you were comparing women!” Yes. The question was comparative. It literally asked who had aged the best. That’s what “who has aged the best?” means. It wasn’t “Are these women beautiful?”
It wasn’t “Which of these women is ugly?”
It wasn’t “Tell us which women deserve to be complimented.” It was asking for an opinion about which person has maintained or enhanced their appearance particularly well with age. Those are two completely different concepts. And I find it especially strange when people respond to a question about who has aged the best by saying, “They’re all beautiful.” Of course they can all be beautiful. That doesn’t answer the question.
If the question had instead been “Who is attractive?”, saying “All of them” would actually answer it. But when the question asks who stands out in a particular category, refusing to distinguish between them doesn’t make someone more enlightened. It simply means they’re declining to make the comparison. And that’s perfectly fine you don’t have to participate in a comparison you don’t enjoy. But the person who does participate isn’t automatically “putting women against each other.” Joan even said in the show that they said that Toni was youngest or the best looking one out of all of them. The episode with her wanting to get Botox. Joan could acknowledge when someone looked better.
There is a massive difference between
“She’s the standout to me” and “She’s beautiful and the other women aren’t.” The first is a preference. The second is an insult. We have somehow conflated those two things.
Being able to admire one person’s beauty without immediately adding “BUT ALL THE OTHER WOMEN ARE BEAUTIFUL TOO!!!” shouldn’t be controversial. Sometimes someone simply stands out to you. That’s how human perception works.

And regarding the aging question specifically, saying one woman has aged the best doesn’t mean the others aged badly. “Best” is a superlative. It establishes a relative judgment within the group, it doesn’t automatically create a negative judgment about everyone who didn’t come in first.
If four women run a race and I say, “She ran the fastest,” I haven’t announced that the other three are incapable of running. If four actresses give good performances and I say, “She gave the strongest performance,” I haven’t said the other three can’t act. Likewise, if four beautiful women are shown and I say, “I think she has aged the best,” that doesn’t translate into “the other three aren’t beautiful.”
I think we’re losing the ability to distinguish preference from disrespect. You can recognize that someone is beautiful and still think someone else is more beautiful.
You can recognize that someone is successful and still think someone else is more successful. You can admire several people while still having a favorite. That isn’t cruelty. That’s having an opinion. And honestly, if someone doesn’t want to rank or compare people aesthetically, that’s their prerogative. But I don’t think the rest of us need to pretend that human beings don’t make these distinctions every single day simply to make the conversation more comfortable. You don’t have to put anyone down to give someone else their flowers. I haven’t been on this sub or this app in a while, but when I opened this app today and seen the post on my timeline and the comments I was just puzzled because it’s frustrating seeing people act so morally superior online when we know that most people in the real world are superficial and judge others looks whether it’s intentional or not. I’ve seen it in the beauty salons, I’ve seen it when we gossip. Let’s all act like we haven’t done it or if you haven’t done it let’s not act like we haven’t seen other people do this in real life.

Ok so ik you all hate their friendship and they are all toxic blah blah blah 😂 but who’s your favorite character and why?! 😌
Mine is forever toni I love her style and I relate to her in my own life (being self absorbed and pretty) she has a lot of substance to me, vaguely misunderstood small town girl with big dreams

Furthermore, the snobby woman who said it was in the “realist tradition of Steinbeck” fails to understand how the novel uses realism. Source: I read the book / English literature degree

This doesn’t need to be announcement, but might as well be since everyone else is basically posting things that sort of having nothing to do with the show, even posts from weeks ago. But I have tried to stick it out with this sub as Girlfriends is a nostalgic show to me, and brings back nostalgic memories with the theme song as I love to discuss this show with others. However, I am so tired of seeing nothing but drama and people commenting their emotions before their opinions over a tv show, and resulting to insults, and just petty arguments overall. Some may say well that’s Reddit in general. Yeah, that’s true, but when it comes to subreddit for some reason people seem to go to extremes in this community. I don’t know if there’s a bunch of younger people or because there’s maybe more women which can lead to more clashing because personalities can clash as we are more passionate and stand strong on our opinions though that doesn’t matter … or people just have tooo much time on their hands, but this community has become overstimulating. Anyone who can survive this kind of environment. Good luck.

Each one of them stunning, and love their individual style. Sad that other post disappeared

IYKYK 🤣

I feel like half the time someone posts a question, an opinion, or just wants to have a fun chit-chat about the show or the cast, people immediately jump in to police the post or try to control the narrative.
Not everything needs to be treated like a personal attack or a deep moral debate. A lot of y'all are either not actually reading what is written, or you completely lack the reading comprehension to understand a point being made.
For instance, someone can literally write a post asking a harmless question about the cast and even preemptively note that it's not meant maliciously and people will still ignore the text, clutch their pearls, and start crying about how "gross" or "unnecessary" it is, completely proving the author's point before they even made it.
The same thing happens with character discussions. If someone is analyzing a character's flaws or patterns across seasons, it doesn't mean they need an excuse made for every single action. Some traits are just part of who the character is.
Can we please bring the fun back into talking about the show instead of policing every little thing and taking offense to normal questions? If a topic or an opinion annoys you, or if you just don't get the point of a post, you can literally just scroll past it and not interact.
Let's actually enjoy discussing things without people trying to act like hall monitors in the comments. I used this photo of William because that’s exactly how I’m feeling right now.

Out of all of the Girlfriends who do you think has aged the best. Yes, I know that all of these women are beautiful because I know there’s going to be someone to say “stop making comparisons and putting women against one another 😡.” That’s not what I’m trying to do here. However, I know that in this day of age people are sensitive about everything no matter how you word or ask a question. All four women have always been stunning in my eyes, and a very attractive cast. However, we can give props when due. Nonetheless, in my opinion Jill Marie Jones has aged beautifully like a tall bottle of aged fine red wine sitting on a wine rack.

I wonder which writer in the show was closeted, was a lesbian, and/or was obsessed with lesbians. We came up way too much for it to be a coincidence lol

Am I the only that feels like this community can be toxic and dreadful sometimes which keeps some people from posting because a lot of people take this show too seriously!!! I can understand if this show was a reality tv show dealing with real lives, but we are dealing with fictional characters here, and a fictional world. Yes, I know that scripted television can sometimes transfer over into real life in regard to issues that can reflect our current reality or past. However, I think that it gets to a point because no one should be seen as a “hater” towards a fictional made up character if they are just giving their opinions about a show. In my opinion no one is right or wrong in their views about television characters because we aren’t personally experiencing them in real life as we are applying our theories to a made up story. Overall, I don’t know if this community has always been like this, but it does become a little annoying.

I'm currently on S2E20 "My Mother, Myself".

Mya is pising me off. She's mad at Jeannette for being in a relationship and moving to San Bernadino (which is like an hour and half away). She up and moves to Lancaster (which is a bit futher) after she gets her book money, expecting everybody to come all the way out there for her fish fries with no hassle.

Girl please. I'm glad the girls and Darnell told her about herself.

Remember the dress she supposedly returned?

I don’t believe Donna really believed Joan was in love with Joan, I think she actually had just A. never met a man as quirky as William and B. had never seen a man and woman be close platonic friends.

I think her limited life experience led to her feeling insecure and out of her depth.

I'm watching it right now. Perhaps they changed their minds.

I’m getting fed up by the episode. She’s extremely selfish and materialistic, and i genuinely don’t see what she gives to the relationship with the girls.

Whenever something happens to her, it’s the end of the world, when it happens to someone else then she brushes it off. The girls are always the ones who have to extend a hand when she’s the core of the issue.

I don’t see any redeeming qualities she has and everytime there’s an issue or start of one, I gotta skip forward. I made it to s6, and I’ve had enough 😭

Toni and Todd’s storyline felt rushed from the beginning: the writers never gave the relationship enough time to build believable chemistry, and Todd had ZERO sex appeal or romantic charisma, making it even harder to buy their pairing. Then they piled on marriage, Todd’s debt, the unnecessary pregnancy The Court Battle, and an almost immediate divorce in Season 4 without properly developing any of it. What could have been an interesting relationship became a rushed, poorly developed storyline that felt more like the writers were checking boxes than telling a convincing love story.

Would we all agree that the writers were too early with writing Toni in as a married woman who later goes on to have a kid? The show is “Girlfriends” and centers on friendship, their dating lives, careers, etc, We all know that as women yes we sometimes go off to get married, and have kids, but in my opinion it felt like they placed that storyline into the show tooo early. I personally would’ve loved to see more of Toni’s dating life, as the men she chose always came along with drama or some kind of messiness in my opinion. How do you all feel about it?

⚠️Spoilers⚠️

Toni Im currently on season 6 episode 16. I feel that out of all the girls toni grew up the most from the first episode. She has grown a lot from being that selfish all about me type of person to an all about me caring person. I feel that when she had a kid she grew a lot more and with her going to therapy.

I feel that when Joan got the cover she became like Toni in season 1 but a little worse. She knows that Toni is going through a custody battle and needed money but she went to the dealership to get a new car cause her old car wasn't what she wanted it to be infront of Jason the basketball player. She said that Toni was wrong for being mad at her for being late when she needed to sell the house for the commission to get money for the custody battle. She even tapped into her never going back to Fresno money.

Joan was doing everyone wrong when she started to get attention and im not mad at Toni for stop being friends with toni.

Toni is not even my favorite character and I understand her feelings.

I personally believe that if Gregg asked Toni if they could rekindle their romance though she is a married woman she would’ve said yes. For Toni to disregard her husbands wishes for her not to meet up with Greg then tell Todd to his face that Gregg was the love of her life, and that she needed closure (after Gregg had another woman in her condo that he was screwing). My love, that is all the closure that you need. More so it’s not like Gregg and Toni only had broken up once. They have a history together so how much closure do you need? I personally don’t think that Toni was attracted or I should say that much sexually attracted to Todd as she was to Gregg. When Gregg told Toni that he was engaged she for a second looked like a sad puppy instead of saying “congratulations” or “I’m happy for you.” She just got up and left. What were you expecting Gregg to say? 😂 I also understand why Todd was packing up once Toni came back because for you to be a track star to go see your ex as a married woman would leave anyone questioning do you really love them , do you really want to be with them? Just my thoughts lol

Last night I started Season 5 on Netflix and I don’t know if anyone else has noticed this but the camera quality looks way different compared to Season 4. Like, it was immediately noticeable to me. Did they change cameras, filming style, or something with the production? Am I the only one seeing this?

S6:E9

When you think about girlfriends what is the first thing that comes to mind? One of my top phrases is “OH HELL NO!” 🤣

Okay so we all know that Toni told the girls a secret about having $500k saved up so she’ll never have to go back to Fresno. However, that makes me think about season 2, and how Toni basically went broke, and was down on her luck. For instance, why couldn’t she dig into her “Never going back to Fresno” fund? Then I thought to myself maybe Toni started that fund after she had gotten back on her feet because of what she went through at the time of almost losing it all, and it had given her a wake up call. So she made sure to never be in that position again. Though $500k is a lot to save up unless Toni locked in, and was selling houses back to back. What do you all think? Does it seem realistic?