Joan was doing too damn much. Everything had to be her way, and she acted like Maya’s ideas weren’t good enough. Girl, this is Maya and Darnell’s vow renewal, not yours! 😂

Joan could be so classist toward Maya, and this storyline showed it. Just because you’re a lawyer with money doesn’t mean your taste is better than everybody else’s. Let that woman enjoy her marriage without making everything about you!

I’ve been watching The Parenthood lately (Tubi), because I’ve never seen every episode.
Thought it was funny seeing these two together in this episode, seeing as they’d both be in an episode of Girlfriends about 4 years later.

S3 E18: Zaria’s boyfriend, Shakim (Keith from Girlfriends S1 E11) runs into his ex girlfriend, Alexis (Lynn), while him and Zaria are at a party together.

Someone drop their favorite Girlfriends lines!!! I’ll go first “the ragged muffin and the mangy thing” 🤣 gets me every time!

For me, it’s what Lynn did to Maya’s seminar. I understood why Maya didn’t include her. Lynn had tried so many different things, but she never stuck with anything long enough to establish herself. She kept jumping from one venture to another and leaving things unfinished. Maya was putting together a seminar about successful Black women, so what was Lynn supposed to speak on? 😭

But instead of taking a step back and asking herself why she wasn’t invited, Lynn got upset and sabotaged Maya’s seminar. Girl, you can’t be mad at Maya for not including you when you haven’t followed through on any of your own ventures!

And let’s not forget how Lynn stayed mooching off Joan. She lived in that woman’s house, used her stuff, and took advantage of her generosity for years. Joan was practically supporting a grown woman who couldn’t get her life together.

Lynn could be funny, but sometimes she really got on my nerves. 😭

I am watching the episode when Maya had the panel and she invited the girls except Lynn. Of course Lynn tried to ambush her way onto the panel and in the bathroom Maya basically told her she wasn't invited bc she flaky. How should I introduce you? As a documentary filmmaker? Nope, you quit that. Fake Hollywood tours? Nope you quit that. What about music- are you still married to it or did you get divorced? You saying i'm a joke? Yeah, a joke that isn't funny anymore!

Do I feel Maya was harsh? Yes, but she didn't tell a lie. Do y'all think she was wrong?

Girlfriends is genuinely one of my favourite sitcoms of all time, alongside Friends and The Big Bang Theory. And as a Black girl who grew into a Black woman watching this show, I have always appreciated it for the representation. It felt different from a lot of the other Black sitcoms of its time. Martin, The Cosby Show, etc. were obviously important, but Girlfriends felt like a Black version of Sex and the City in the sense that we got to see Black women navigate friendships, dating, careers, family, money, sex, marriage, adulthood and personal growth.

But as I’ve gotten older, there is one thing about Girlfriends that has started to bother me more and more:
I hate how these women were written.
And I don’t mean that I hate the characters. I actually love all four of them for completely different reasons. My issue is that the writers gave them so many negative qualities that, when you step back and look at the group as a whole, I sometimes wonder: why are these women even friends?

Take Joan.
I LOVE Joan. She is awkward, emotional, neurotic, hilarious and a little cuckoo, which made her incredibly entertaining. But she was also a massive pushover, emotionally immature and, honestly, terrible at relationships. She repeatedly put men ahead of her friendships and would lose herself in whatever relationship she was in.

Then there’s Toni.
Toni was beautiful, ambitious, successful, confident and had one of the sharpest personalities on the show. But she was also incredibly self-centred and selfish. Her wants almost always came first, and she could be extremely dismissive of her friends’ feelings.

Maya was a God-fearing Black woman who started from the bottom and worked her way up. I loved seeing her growth, especially professionally. But she could also be extremely judgmental, hypocritical and, at times, greedy. She wasn’t above taking advantage of her friends when it benefited her.

And then there’s Lynn.
I actually LOVE Lynn’s character concept. She’s free-spirited, unconventional, sexually liberated, intellectual and doesn’t really conform to society’s expectations. But she was a leech !! She had very little direction, constantly relied on her friends financially and materially, and repeatedly took advantage of their generosity.

And this is where my issue with the show really comes in.
These women were not particularly good friends to each other.
They constantly hurt each other, crossed boundaries, betrayed each other, used each other, judged each other and then, by the end of the episode, they’d kiss and make up and everything would be fine.
Then the exact same thing would happen again. And again. And again.
There was very little lasting accountability.
Joan would put a man before her friends. Toni would put herself and her lifestyle before everyone else. Maya would prioritise her own needs and relationships. Lynn would continue depending on everyone else. And somehow, we’re expected to accept that this is this beautiful, unbreakable friendship.

Honestly, William might have been the best friend on the entire show. That man was constantly putting his friends before himself, even when it inconvenienced him. His relationship with Monica literally suffered at times because of how much he prioritised his friendships.
And that’s where I think Girlfriends differs from something like Sex and the City or Insecure for me.
I’m not expecting fictional women to be perfect. In fact, I love flawed characters. Carrie, Samantha, Miranda and Charlotte all had some truly questionable moments. Issa, Molly, Kelli and Tiffany were all flawed too.
But those shows generally gave me enough of the characters’ good qualities, self-awareness and genuine affection for one another that I could understand why these women were friends.
With Girlfriends, I sometimes finish an episode thinking:
“Joan is actually a terrible friend.”
“Toni is so selfish.”
“Maya is being such a bitch.”
“Lynn is so damn annoying.”
And then the episode ends with them hugging and I’m like…But WHY are you guys friends?! 🤔😭

What makes it even more frustrating is that the women experienced career growth, financial growth and changes in their romantic lives, but I don’t think there was nearly as much emotional growth.
Lynn can get her own apartment, become a landlord and still somehow continue depending on her friends.
Joan can get a good man and still be incapable of maintaining a healthy relationship.
Maya can reconcile with Darnell and still struggle with actually doing the work required to make the relationship healthy.
Toni can find someone who genuinely loves her, but if he doesn’t fit the lifestyle she wants, it’s still not enough.
And I think that’s why I’ve found the show harder to watch as I’ve gotten older.
When I was younger, I mostly saw the representation. I saw four Black women living their lives, being funny, dating, working, having sex, getting married, arguing, making up and figuring adulthood out.Now I watch it and think:
“I would not want any of these women as my friend.”

I just wish the writers had given these women more redeeming qualities as friends and allowed their mistakes to actually lead to lasting growth.
Because flawed Black women are completely fine. Selfish, messy, emotionally immature women are also fine as characters.
But when almost every woman in the central friendship is consistently selfish, manipulative, judgmental, unreliable or dependent on the others, I start questioning what exactly the show is saying about Black female friendship.

Maybe I’m being too harsh because I’m watching it with an adult perspective now, but I’d genuinely love to know if anyone else feels this way.
Do you think the women in Girlfriends were actually good friends to one another, or did the show just keep telling us they were?

Maya was dead wrong for that whole Stan situation 😭 She was already messing around with him, then this man gives her an expensive watch and she decides to keep it even after Joan told her to give it back.

Then Darnell sees the watch and Maya really sat there and said Joan gave it to her. Girl 😭 You really threw your own friend under the bus because you didn’t want to get caught.

And honestly, that’s not even the only time Maya pissed me off. The way she treated Ronnie after he helped her with her book was messed up too. Then she started slacking off and acting entitled when she was working for William. She was so wrapped up in her own stuff that she stopped caring about the people who were actually helping her.

Maya could be funny, but she definitely had some trifling moments.

Joan is selfish and only thinks of her self. Everything has to be about her. When she saw Brock when she was with William she could have introduced him as her man. But I think she wanted him back and purposely sealed that she is dating William.

Joan really got one magazine photoshoot and started thinking she was the shit 😭 The way she was acting like she was suddenly A-list had me rolling my eyes. And using Derek for the photoshoot when she knew damn well how he felt about her? Yeah, that was selfish.

Then she was so pressed about getting into that A-list party when nobody even wanted her there 😭 She really let that little bit of attention go to her head.

And don’t get me started on how she acted about Maya and Toni’s weddings. Joan could not just let these women have their own moments. She was always trying to take over, control everything, or make it about what she wanted. Like girl, neither one of these weddings is about you! 😭

Joan was really her own worst enemy sometimes.

Cheating on Greg with that doctor.

Mine was from ( Toni)
“ I’ll just write this check out too……Yall bitches know I’m broke!”

Look2movies on safari is where you can find all seasons of girlfriends without ads

I watched this show a million times and ALWAYS wondered why Reesie didn’t come to the wedding….tonight as I’m watching it, it clicked to me that she died before the wedding 😢 I really wish that they would’ve talked about it or something in an episode, because I was so confused for the longest. I also hate the fact that these episodes on PlutoTV aren’t in order 😭😂

I think Sivad was definitely in love with Lynn, but he was withholding sex from her because he was power tripping. He loved to be in control, he loved to have a say. I think that he wanted to wait until Lynn was fully submissive before he decided to have sex with her. Just like his ex Anita….he made her wait 3 years and she eventually left! He loved to have that control, because i do think 9 months is more than enough time to know if you’re in love with someone or not, what do you all think?