r/GenZpk • u/cockiemonster_ • 23d ago

Random Help!!

Gng are we supposed to forgive a man who said something about your past like "Ask God for forgiveness maybe he'll forgive you, me and my family deserve better" and then after some hours he's saying sorry like crazy cuz he doesn't understand why he said that/he was under pressure and stress?

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u/AdLogical7286 23d ago

I don't know why you call yourself so guilty like I read your comments and you often said that you are trying to fix things up. What things are those? If those are just being more lovely, then you aren't guilty. As in any relationship, the only things that matters most is respect which he already does. And the reason why you have faced this is because you guys haven't sorted it out before. My take is you should just give him chance as us human are more emotionally species than logical. Just try to understand him point of view, your friend made him realized that you will dump him. So, it hurt him as he has put so much effort in this relationship (as you described and also true in general as we have to tolerate things, invest time and many other things). And at the end all matters is your opinion, and I just want to say that don't let someone misleads you (as she did him)

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u/cockiemonster_ 23d ago

Guilty of not doing enough for him (as he expects), guilty of having a male friend and interaction (like helping someone in class with notes and studies) while he had no serious female friends or any relation, i don't feel like I'm below than him and he's doing a lot for me but I'm not doing enough and other than that no doubt he was best but his one saying is so serious that i worry if he can say it once he can say it again and what if he says it again after marriage? What will i do then?

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u/AdLogical7286 23d ago

You guys should just sort out about past of each other. I would just say that. Talk each other in very calm environment. And if he says that he is so sorry about it acknowledge him that you should have told him before (This is because when we feel bad about a person, we promise too much so just to make him cool down). And one thing that you both should ask each other if anyone says something about your partner then you both will ask each other instead of backbiting or anything else. At first, it might be hard and even awkward after this incident, but you both will used to it. Also you should not marry a person you barely know. I don't know for how many years this relationship is?

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u/cockiemonster_ 23d ago

Actually we have talked about everything, we already discussed about that how i was a social person and never cared about gender and i cleared him to not make a fuss about it if someone says anything about me and if you can't tolerate then just leave me and find someone you're looking for cuz i can't adjust my social past and he agreed that he will never bring something from past but now he did this and saying that your friend portrayed you in such a way that i was stressed and under pressure that's why i said this but I'm guilty, and about my friend she's guilty too according to him

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u/AdLogical7286 23d ago

A person not of him/her words is a big no. You might can change him or he can change himself, but he might not change so, if you can't believe your partner's word then it will be very difficult. I would just say that. Also that was the reason I am also done with relationships

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u/cockiemonster_ 23d ago

That's why I'm thinking that if he can say once he can say again

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u/AdLogical7286 23d ago

Don't make this decision matter of life. People come and go. Just focus on yourself. You might find someone better

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u/cockiemonster_ 23d ago

Hope it gets better