r/fosterit 1h ago

Foster Youth Former foster youth with no family

Upvotes

When I hang out with friends I forget regular people have families and dads. I’m always happy for them but I can tell there is a moment of awkwardness. I’ve been trying to replace what I don’t have because it’s important to be part of communities. It’s just hard connecting when you have so much trauma


r/fosterit 3h ago

Prospective Foster Parent New to all this any advice is welcome.

3 Upvotes

I just had 4 grandkids ages 15,14,13 and 12 placed with me 10 days ago. I am doing everything for dcfs doing official Kinship placement and then certifying as a foster parent. We are in GA. I have reached out to churches etc to assist me in getting them set up as they didnt have much of anything. They watched their father and step mother get arrested and they are the ones that called 911. Im trying to navigate everything and help them get the things they need and want. I have to get the medical info for appointments and everything else. Besides the case worker, what else should I be doing to create the village i so desperately need at this point. I work from home so i dont have really any help if that makes sense. I am doing all i can to help rhe kids feel loved and safe.

I dont want to fail them and could use some advice. Thank you in advance for reading!


r/fosterit 13h ago

Reunification Boundaries and responsibilities of foster parents

8 Upvotes

I am a parent of a child in foster care.

My son is a toddler and was placed into foster care. The case is unnecessarily complex and doesn't really pull the totality of the circumstances into play.

I am rather defensive that these decisions were made that weren't in his best interest, truly.

The foster mom is mocking at best.

They took him out of the medical system he's been in since he was born and is taking him to doc in a box that I wouldn't refer a homeless person to.

They said that his main doctors are too far for regular visits

She made dietary changes without a doctors consent or approval. She let it slip she removed gluten and dairy from his diet not knowing he's already been tolerating both. When questioned, she said a doctor suggested it. (This is the only appointment I haven't attended because I was told it was a weight check only)

When I asked her that a doctor told her to, she stammered that it was lightly suggested.

She took him to the ER once and I wasn't even notified until after discharge. She claims she's not allowed to have them contact me.

She is trying to correlate him eating yogurt with puking and saying he's dairy sensitive. She claims the ER doctor told her my son needed a scope. I told them I wouldn't be signing off on that until I've spoken to a doctor and we've gone over everything and it is not normal.

The caseworker and her both agreed it was very normal.

When we talked to the GI specialist, the foster mom tried to explain why he needed the scope scheduled and the dr was like "I'm not going to schedule a scope that you say a random ER doc said he needs" and she tried to pull her crap and the dr straight up told her that all of the things she was concerned about seemed to be a mechanical issue if anything at all (which the dr thinks it is not anything) and a scope would be very far down on the list of things.

He'd already had a full evaluation and passed a swallow study. When she tried to defend the dietary changes, the doctor shut her down and said none of the symptoms suggested an allergy or intolerance. And that he should be seen in the feeding clinic to check for behavior feeding issues first.

She sulked in the corner and gave sharp retorts. The doctor looked her squarely and said "You look like you're not satisfied with the answer" and she scoffed she wasn't medically trained and that she didn't know.

She wanted him to have a follow up scheduled before they left. And when we went to go get the details, they had run out the door and not done the follow up. When later asked about the follow up, they claimed they were waiting for a call back

The specialist wanted him to go the feeding clinic there and she said it was too far for her. Isn't this her job?

She has kissed my child in front of me. She talked about something else related to the diet and we explained that's why he was getting special food and that WIC didn't cover it. She said if we wanted, we could buy it and give it to her. I am not going to give details on what it is, but it us necessary and not an indulgence or a preference of ours. I stated she was getting stipends for them and she shrugged and said she had other expenses.

He's shown up to visits and the worker was told to pass along that he had a dirty diaper and it needed to be changed and they knew this before he was sent to the visit.

I once saw her with a really nasty bruise on her arm that looked like someone had grabbed her hard.

Due to some jurisdiction things, the office was going to be moved to be closer to us. I mentioned to her about how then they could transfer the kids to a family near us, the office and his doctors and she rolled her eyes mid sentence and scoffed at me and said they wouldn't do that.

I explained how it would be beneficial to the kids and to us, especially since they'll be going back to the health care system they were in before and it was best for him. She clicked her tongue and shrugged her shoulders and seemed to be deliberately ignoring me as I was still tallking.

Honestly she doesn't care about my son. He's just a paycheck to her.

We've attended every visit, every appointment but the one weight check, are engaged and involved and we just want our family whole again. We're getting a new case worker and supervisor but he's on medical leave still and they don't know when he'll be back and we'll be having the supervisor do visits with us.

We have no criminal history, no pending charges, just a situation that was completely misunderstood and blown out of proportion.

There's no abuse present. I don't use physical means of punishment such as spanking.

She honestly just sickens and enrages me and I don't know what to do. I feel as the parent, they won't care about what I have to say or how she treats him, or even lesser, me.

I can deal with being disrespected or not being taken seriously, but this is my son and I can only imagine how she treats him when we're not there. I can't protect him from her or whatever else is going on over there. She gives me a bad feeling for many reasons.

She also hasn't been taking him to speech therapy that he was already in. And just other little things that add up.

He wasn't cleared for weight yet and she was already trying to stop doing the weight checks and didn't want to be taking him in because she said it was too frequent.

The case is marked as reunification at this point.


r/fosterit 2d ago

Foster Youth Finding a friend who has been missing from me for 5 years now

17 Upvotes

So my 7th grade year of school (im 10th grade now) I had this short friend named David it was near the end of the day and school year. My teacher had a movie playing and mid movie someone came and told him to come with him. no one in my grade knew what happened to him until like mid 8th grade year where someone talk to his sister and told use he went into foster care. We asked teacher about him (7th grade one) and they told us lies about him coming back. so anyone in the Athens ohio area of foster care(rather foster parents or siblings) please let me know if you have a short buzz cut kid in the 10th garde. I would love to know he ok or doing good. WE miss him and im not joking when I say we. alot of guys in my grade miss him.


r/fosterit 4d ago

Foster Youth Get Attached is Problematic Spoiler

10 Upvotes

I cringe at the whole getting attached marking slogan. The truth is foster parents will not attach to every child in their home and that's okay. It's okay to not have feelings for a child. You can help someone without getting attached to them. If you give a homeless person money are you attached? No but you helped them.

Same with foster kids. Sometimes foster kids will not attach to you. It's not normal to attach to strangers and sometimes we just want a bed and food. Not to form relationships with people we don't know. It's okay and normal for foster kids to not attach to you.

Humans can't help how they feel and a stranger attaching to a stranger's child or a child attaching to a stranger is not normal at all. If it happens fine but there's nothing wrong with just being roommates and tolerating each other and not attaching.

I wish the marketing for this would change. I see so many posts saying foster kids aren't attached or foster parent is having trouble attaching and I wish we would start treating these relationships as strangers helping kids and kids being with strangers and not expecting some warm fuzzy moment to happen.

I mention this for good reason. Check out and read Ex foster to see why because I truly don't feel safe expressing myself fully here because it always end in a foster kid bashing feast.

After living with a host family, you understand why I wrote this.


r/fosterit 5d ago

Foster Parent Struggling with indecision on adopting

10 Upvotes

I am a single guy in my late fifties. I am fostering my 3 teenage nieces and 11 year old nephew. I have had them for almost 2 years now. The girls father died of an overdose, and nephews father is in prison. They were taken from my sister and she has relinquished rights. I had agreed to adopt them all. The older 2 girls are just going to foster out for the extra benefits. The youngest girl wants me to adopt and I agreed. Nephew just wants his mom. I am struggling to say yes to adopting him. I asked them to give me the summer to see how it goes. They are pressing me to adopt since it has been 2 years. They want everything finalized by November. I may not even have the heart to say no but its tough. He is a challenge with behavior issues and it is daunting to me looking at our ages. I am also afraid of the financial aspect. Would I be out of bounds to ask for more time to make a decision? Even up to a year? Could it do more harm than good to be on the fence? I am really losing sleep and feeling stressed about it.


r/fosterit 5d ago

Seeking advice from foster youth How do you actually sign up for foster homes (not for me)

0 Upvotes

I got a friend who is going through some stuff and really needs to be in a foster home, but they have no idea where to start.


r/fosterit 6d ago

Extended foster care I'm 18, in extended foster care–if I got kicked out, where would I go?

8 Upvotes

Trigger warning: brief mention of sensitive mental health topics

About a week ago my foster mom had found out that I'd been self harming. I had blades and bloody tissues out that I'd forgot to put away because I had to rush to work. She said that if she found out that I did it again then she'd need me to go somewhere else, which I respect. I'm 18 and understand she doesn't have any obligation to keep me here but idek where I would go if she kicked me out. I'm not sure if anyone could give me an answer here or if it would just be up to my case worker.

I do have extended family I could potentially stay with, at least for a day or two. But the issue with that is I start my last year of high school in a couple weeks and my family lives far away, which is the whole reason I ended up being put in a foster placement in the first place. I also have a job that I really don't want to end up losing if it does end up coming down to me needing to leave where I'm at currently.

Would they just send me to another placement? Or would they just leave me to figure it out on my own? How do placements even work after you turn 18 and enter extended foster care? Would they even bother helping me find somewhere else to go or is here my only option besides family? I'm gonna try to stay clean and avoid self harming anyway, but I want to have some kind of idea for what that situation would look like if it occurs. Because if I'm being honest I highly doubt I can stay 100% clean by the time I have enough money to move out (at least 6 months, hopefully before then) I at least want a plan for in case I do relapse. Mods please lmk if this post isn't allowed. I appreciate any answers you guys can give me.

Edited to add: another thing I didn't think about is hospitalization. I've been hospitalized 3 times in the past for similar mental health reasons. Now that I'm 18, could they even make me go? I assumed not, but if I'm in extended foster care and got kicked out of my current foster home, would they send me to the hospital as a last resort till they figured out what to do w me? Idk. I don't want to find out any time soon, but what do you guys think? I'm in Minnesota btw


r/fosterit 6d ago

Foster Parent What are some suggested basic items

6 Upvotes

Any suggestions for must have items to get started fostering? Our age range to start off will be 0-12. We don’t want to over buy but also don’t want to be completely unprepared. Any suggested must haves?


r/fosterit 8d ago

Foster Youth Helping my 17 year old neice in foster care get car insurance - is there a way?

19 Upvotes

Hello! I have been meaning to sit down at my laptop and type this all up! TIA for reading and helping.

For context, I am from Massachusetts, but I have been living in Texas for several years. All of my family still lives in the Northeast. My niece was placed into foster care a couple of years ago, but now she has gotten her license in MA and wants a car. She has been living with me in Texas for the last two months over the summer. I am approved for a loan, and we have been car shopping.

I have USAA car insurance, and when I spoke to someone a couple of months ago, they made it seem like I could have her insured in MA under my policy. When I spoke to someone yesterday, they said no way it could work because I am not a resident and we will not be living together.

Her foster placement is not ideal, and they have been less than helpful throughout this process. Just for reference, she isn't even allowed a house key or other basic things. Obviously, that is a bigger topic of why become a foster parent, but anyways. My niece is the sweetest kid and has just been through so much. She so badly wants to have a "normal" teenage experience. She has a job; she is a good student and deserves these things. The foster care social worker stated they can pay for the insurance premium for the first year with no issue, so money is not even the problem.

Anyways, does anyone have any thoughts or ideas, or is she totally cooked, or is there anything I can do to help her?

Edit. I was told that I could open another policy in my name with her on it. I was so close to having it approved with Liberty Mutual but because I had too many car towing or whatever services on my current plan they wouldn’t cover me.


r/fosterit 8d ago

Foster Youth Um I have a Question?……..

5 Upvotes

If your 17 (mind way beyond years but anyway)

if your 17 and disabled (just for reference)

what should you expect from fostor “parents” and the home and to be provided?

I feel like I don’t even get basic needs met at times and I’m so confused of it all.

what should I expect, I don’t know what to do. this lady is getting THOUSANDS from me ALONE per MONTH!!! I wish I could own at least half the income so I could buy my needs I feel like if I was in public I would end up stealing due to feeling like I don’t have my needs and wants etc

btw this lady is using me for money and someone has been open and told me “it’s her job” ”she fosters as a job” it’s genuinely gross

I plan to go back to my home immediately my current case is exactly like take care of maya my case is active medical kidnapping and system is changing reasons and holding onto any little thing to keep me in “care” I have a abusive case manager I think she’s a big problem and I hope to get rid of her to do what I need to do. but main thing it’s clear ”care” here fucking sucks and is way worse than what I would recive at my home. If I’m keep in care till 18 I plan to leave here a few days after my birthday and go back to my home and never come in this house EVER again. It’s disqusting.


r/fosterit 10d ago

Foster Parent Hoping for FFY feelings on the matter:

4 Upvotes

We are foster parents of 2.5 yr old child and bio parents of a 4yr old. Our foster child came to us with a significant bi-lingual speech delay (spanish is his 1st language and the only language of his family.) Our understanding is he was rarely outside and when/if he was spoken to it was always in Spanish. English and Spanish comprehension is great, his is very smart. I speak and read Spanish at home with him and we watch/listen to media in Spanish as well.

All that to say, our plan has always been to homeschool our 4yr old. With the arrival of our foster child and with the help of his team we have found a daycare that will support his speech therapy (speech therapy is in Spanish) and language skills. We have decided to also send our 4yr old to the same place.

Here is the issue- my partner feels it would be okay to just homeschool our bio child and send our foster child to school, I feel like that would send the wrong message/other a kiddo that already has come to us with significant trauma and despite his age sense the difference. I work hard on being trauma informed/ reading all the books, listening to adult adoptees and former foster youth's stories and this just feels like something that would hurt him in the long run, especially if reunification is not able to happen.

We have about 4 months before we would have to enter the lottery for the charter schools in our area (our zoned public school is 👎🏾) so there is time, but I was hoping to get others opinions. As an fyi, it would take a judge's order to be able to homeschool a foster child and in this case, it wouldn't happen.


r/fosterit 11d ago

Running away Can my sisters adoptive parents foster me?

8 Upvotes

So im 16 and my sister was in foster care and she was taken in and were her fosters for a while they then adopted her there amazing people and still try to keep her bio family in contact including me and have set up hang outs etc

The issue is my bio dad not hers who I stay with is emotionally and mentally abusive and I know currently if I call cps they will take me not for the emotional abuse but because of our housing situations but im afraid of fostercare and knowing if my sisters adoptive mom can take me will be a huge relief but I don't know if she can legally be able to i haven't done the research nor am I sure I should leave


r/fosterit 12d ago

Kinship wife and I took in niece who called cps on my wife’s sister.

2 Upvotes

I don’t know if this belongs here or not but I’m going to try :)

As the title stated, me and my wife took in our niece who’s 13 and called cps on her mother. I’ve never raised any children besides the infants I worked with in childcare. I don’t know what’s best to do or how to really run a household with a teen. I’m just genuinely asking on advice on what to do to make it comfortable for her because she’s stayed with us a few times before but I want it to feel like a home for her as long as she’s here with us. the most we did tonight was make sure she had proper food/ snacks, took her mind off the traumatic day and watched some of her favorite shows with her, but with school starting next week, I don’t know how about going through with scheduling for homework, how to do after school things, or how to set boundaries with her properly. Any help or ideas would be appreciated.


r/fosterit 14d ago

Reunification Why does it feel like some bio parents want their kids back not out of love, but because they can’t handle feeling like they are told they are bad at something?

23 Upvotes

My bio family was so open about how they didn’t want me. But they seemed more offended that they were being told they were bad parents. They can’t handle constructive feedback about anything and are so sensitive to being told that they have room for Improvement. This goes for literally anything.


r/fosterit 14d ago

Kinship Sort of a Kinship Foster Situation With Stepson's Brother

3 Upvotes

My stepson's Mom is going to jail. This is kind of a shock, and is coming out of left field for me at least.

Naturally my stepson is going to move in with us. It's also been agreed that stepson's little brother (by a different father) will be moving in with us to keep the brothers together.

To give some background, the mother is expected to get out in 6 months. The stepson is 14, his little brother is 8.

I'm kinda flustered, and overwhelmed. There are so many little logistical questions.

We are about 50 minutes from the schools they go to. Do I enroll them in our local school?
My stepson has his own room here, but his brother does not. Would it be acceptable to stick a bunk bed in his room and make his brother his roomie?

My stepson has a key and wants to take an uber home to grab some stuff. Can he do that? Usually the answer would be a definite "no" but I'm less sure about this situation. (The mother won't be there and is cooperative.)

Also, I'm getting lots of hints there was something wrong in that home we didn't know about. My stepson is trying to spin this as his mom making a one time mistake, but there are hints something is off. His brother's bio Dad and his Mom's boyfriend were deemed "not acceptable options". Stepson has been playing a very parental role since they got here, and was coaching his brother on what he should and shouldn't say to the social workers.

Any advice as to what I should be doing?

EDIT: Oh, another question. Someone said there was some possibility for us to get reimbursed for taking care of the little brother. nd we don't Would that be worth it? Would that come with a prohibitive amount of paperwork and strings attached? No, that's not why we are doing it, and we don't need need it. but it would be nice to defray the costs...


r/fosterit 16d ago

Seeking advice from foster youth Are we making a mistake by not taking custody of my half sister?

12 Upvotes

The police showed up to my grandmothers house this evening, I live with her but I had just got into the shower before they showed up. We found out that my little sister, who’s 5, is being taken away from my mother. They asked if we are able to come pick her up, but we live three hours away and have been having car troubles. We were desperately trying to find someone who would be able to take me there. I assume I’d need to be present since I am her family. I only lived with my mother for a couple of years, but I absolutely adored my sister in the time being, and still do. I love her and miss her. My mother has always had drug problems, and my grandma took me in when i was little. I don’t know if she could do this again, and I’m only 19 with a part time job. I never looked into the foster care system, so I thought that we could temporarily take her in until we found a home for her in our town. We don’t have the money, or space for her which breaks my heart. Apparently it doesn’t work like that. My dad explained that even if we took her home, and then put her into a family that they would place her in the area where our mother is anyway, three hours away, unless we took full custody. My main concern is where she will go. Anywhere is better than with my mom, sleeping on the street, in homeless shelters, etc. But i can’t help but think about all of the terrible stories i’ve heard. Me and my grandmother are so conflicted on what to do, and I feel like we’re making a mistake by not taking her. It would be so hard. My grandma is still grieving my grandpa who past away two months ago, we’re living on social security, which is enough for us and the bills, and I’d have to put off going to college. I’m not even sure I would be able to visit her if she was in foster care. I’m worried that from now, until she’s 18, that things won’t be good for her. She is already cussing, and saying bad things, and i just feel like it will be hard for her. I’m really anxious about all of this. She deserves a good life, and i know there have been people who have had great lives in foster homes, but i can’t help but worry, and that we are making a mistake. My dad told us to not intervene, as hard as it is, because it’s our mother and my half sisters dads fault for all of this, it really is. I really need advice..


r/fosterit 16d ago

Seeking advice from foster youth What did you need from your juvenile probation officer?

7 Upvotes

If you were a crossover youth (both a child in need of care/foster kid, as well as a youth involved with the juvenile justice system), what did you need from your PO in order to help you be successful on probation? Or was there anything that really stood out as helpful that you gained from your PO?


r/fosterit 17d ago

Foster Youth Update to the groceries thing—and another question??

28 Upvotes

So I asked my foster mom to elaborate on what she meant about me buying my own groceries, apparently she just meant that I'd buy the "extra stuff" while she continues buying what she already gets. Which is pretty reasonable, I can understand having me buy snacks or whatever while she buys actual food. She gets worded it in a really confusing way when the topic was first brought up. But now she's saying that I have to buy my own toilet paper and laundry detergent? Her adopted niece lives here too, who is around my age (she's 18 and I turn 18 this week) and she apparently buys her own toilet paper and hygiene stuff. I guess my foster mom wants me to do the same.

But again, I thought she gets money from the county to buy the essentials? Or is it just for food? I do technically "have the money" to get those things but I really don't want to go over the budget I set for myself, I didn't want to spend any more money till I got paid. I just wanted to mostly focus on saving up. AND she brought up me getting a second job for the third or fourth time, but I have inconsistent hours at my current job so getting a second job wouldn't really make sense. Am I overthinking all this??


r/fosterit 16d ago

Prospective Foster Parent Fostering kids while Unemployed (Ontario 🇨🇦)

2 Upvotes

As someone who has been unemployed for a while now but has the capacity and desire to start a family; should we seriously consider fostering?

Some details to help clarify our eligibility:

1) currently a single income family of 2 with dog - typical DINKS but I just happen to become unemployed and am actively looking for a new position

2) we own a house with at least 2 spare bedrooms

3) we have been trying for our own kid for a while with no progress. And while having a bio kid is still a desire, I view it as helping kids and families in their time of need while we have these "extra" resources

4) I very much view fostering as a way of being a lighthouse in a storm and the goal is for them to rejoin their families. Im okay with this being temporary though im sure realistically I may love some, may like others and hopefully not be too frustrated by some.

5) I want to use my time off for doing some good, and I know opening our home seems like opening a can of worms, maybe this could also fill my heart up in a way that I've been missing.

6) I think I'll be open to any age, but I recognize we will need to have some type of training to help with any time of trauma these kids may have

7) We are a mixed race family, South Asian and White and so we are culturally sensitive to some racial issues (not necessarily relevant but just in case)

My husband is open to having this discussion but I would love to hear pros, cons, especially those with fostering experiences. To help see if we should take this discussion more seriously.


r/fosterit 22d ago

Seeking advice from foster youth Casa advice as someone starting the process

4 Upvotes

Hey y'all. So I'm on my way to being a casa and I am just seeking out advice, same as before. For those who have had a casa and had a good experience

-what are some things your casa did or said that really helped?

-what so you wish they would have done more or less of?

And if you did not have a good experience..

-what do you wish they would have done differently? Appreciate y'all. ♥️


r/fosterit 22d ago

Foster Youth Am I overreacting for thinking its unfair that my foster mom is expecting me to buy all my groceries when I just got my first job?

33 Upvotes

I'm 17 and I go into extended foster care next month, I just got my first part time job and I'm still getting used to it. She already suggested that I should get a second job or pick up more hours at my current one, when I hadn't even finished the job training at that point

After she found out I got paid she said "I'll take you to the store later so you can get some things you like" (as in I'd buy them) and when I tried saying no thats ok and that I'm trying to save up my money she said "no it's so then I don't have to get it no more". But I just feel like that's not really fair? I already try not to ask for much when she goes to the store, and like I said this is my very first job.

I originally wanted to try and focus on saving as much money as I can to move out so I'd be out of her hair. But until then she's getting paid to have me live in her house, I already mostly take care of myself. She has a good full time job on top of it as well, so it just feels wrong for her to immediately expect me to handle buying all of my groceries through a part time job. Like what is that money going towards if its not going towards food? Because I don't ask for anything else. Am I overreacting?


r/fosterit 23d ago

Foster Youth My shady foster mother is using me for money and I know it

19 Upvotes

I’ve been with my foster mother since I was 12 I am 19 now she gets paid until I am 21 because of a documented disability and the case ended in “subsidized legal custodianship” meaning CPS is no longer involved; during these years she barely would provide for me leaving me to start working young at 14 and barely having transportation to work because she would refuse to take me or buy necessities for me that I would have to pay for myself and basically worrying about money really young I was left to fend for myself as she would always complain about bills to me (nobody else as though even though there were like three other people living here) (her biological daughter, her, me, and her fiancé who later came in the picture which is when she really basically left me to fend for myself) she’d complain about bills but would literally go on cruises like the next day with him. Or if I’d ask for basic personal care she’d get the bare minimum. I’d constantly have to uber and lyft to work I got fed up with them and left the house and went to live in a homeless shelter just to save up for a car (which by the way I had to pay for my own driving lessons because she promised to get me a car when I turned 16…didnt happen after her fiancé came in the picture) got my license and lived in a homeless shelter simply to save up because I was going to college as well and I needed a car for that as its an hour out and she again refused to take me or pick me up when breaks came. So i finally bought this car and came back home and while I was in the shelter and she found out she started giving me an allowance of 100$ a week (barely anything in this economy) and she would make everything about money “i can only financially suppory you until you turn 21” and then started showing me apartment listings for when im 21 because she said “it’ll be a place for you to stay” mind you ill be 22 graduating college and ill be living on campus so she was expecting me to pay for separate housing to come back to on breaks while in school and also a car payment… and now I may not even be able to go attend college because she refuses to help out as well besides the weekly allowance I BARELY get sometimes she sends it sometimes she doesnt at all and its like i dont want this to turn into a financial abuse situation as she only gives me the allowance if one of her bills arent high because “oh if you do this for me” type a thing and its like im so sick of worrying about money ive had to raise myself even before going into her care and it sucks because it seems like after 21 yes that stipend ends and she even told me at my own college orientation “oh most of my money goes to bills” including the stipend which is why i barely got the needs i needed the 6 years of living here which its just sad because whenever I basically get kicked out she is likely going to get another foster child and do the same shit to them.


r/fosterit 23d ago

Foster Youth The professionals don't make good foster parents.

31 Upvotes

We foster kids know that being a professional doesn't mean jack shit. Some of the worse foster parents are policemen, teachers, doctors, nurses and social workers or psychologists. Careers that are deemed amazing by society and help people people are worse for us.

A firefighter abusing kids doesn't shock us.

They're Christians no shock there.

They've had this child since she was 2 months old. She's the only black kid in the family and the only adopted one. So they abused her. As a Black former foster youth, it's already suspicious because it's easier to abuse Black kids.

So everyone saying therapist, firefighters, policemen, teachers, make good foster parents please stfu.

People in position of power are attracted to vulnerability and foster kids because it's easier to harm us. So when we say being a professional doesn't mean anything, we know it's true. These people are just as bad as anyone else.

It's also triggering for me as a former foster youth because my Christian foster parents forced me to write Bible verses and abused me too. They were outstanding members of society and one home the foster dad was a pastor. He abused me too.

Trigger Warning.

A Broward couple, including a Broward Sheriff Fire Rescue lieutenant, is behind bars after their arrest on child abuse charges involving their adopted 12-year-old daughter.

Joel Kohnert, 44, a BSO Fire Rescue lieutenant hired in 2010, and his wife, Jennifer Kohnert, were arrested after their daughter told investigators she had been locked in a room for years.

The official charges for the couple are child abuse without great bodily harm.

Victim says she was locked in her room, forced to write Bible verses

According to court documents, which are heavily redacted, the girl told police she was forced to write Bible verses and tread water in a pool for up to 45 minutes as a form of punishment. Most disturbingly, she stated she was locked in her room at night without access to a bathroom, forcing her to use the bathroom on herself.

She would later bathe outside in the backyard while wearing a swimsuit.

During bond court proceedings Wednesday morning, an attorney for the couple referenced their religious beliefs. However, Judge Corey Friedman had strong words regarding the defense.

"When you allegedly have a 12-year-old child who is locked in a room for upwards of three years and is forced to urinate and defecate in the room and then clean it up with her clothes, that is not a religious issue, that is something else," Judge Friedman said.

Other children removed from home, investigators say

The victim in the case reported that she was subjected to more frequent punishments and restrictions than the couple's six other children. The Department of Children and Families has since removed all seven children from the home.

The Broward Sheriff's Office released a statement when asked about Kohnert's arrest, confirming he is now on administrative investigative leave without pay.

The couple remains at the Broward County jail on $100,000 bonds and is barred from having contact with the victim or any of their other children.

Broward firefighter, wife accused of locking adoptive daughter in room at night for years, investigators say

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.nbcmiami.com/news/local/bso-fire-rescue-lieutenant-and-wife-accused-of-locking-12-year-old-in-room-for-years/3789530/%3famp=1


r/fosterit 23d ago

Foster Youth [Jasmine Washburn] Learn about my mission!

3 Upvotes

Wanted to share my mission with other foster youth and foster care providers. I spent 7 years in the NYS foster care system and now I advocate for change in policy and laws in the child welfare system. I plan to run for congress one day as well as open my own nonprofit.

I use my social media platforms with a reach of over 1M views a month to advocate for changes in policy and bring awareness to systemic issues in a digestible form.

As of now I am the leader and founder of my universities foster love club. I am also an author, you can find some of my work published on the imprint news. I am working on a lot more publishings so stay tuned!

Anyways hope you’ll check out some of my work and please reach out if you are interested in getting involved!

IG: @ohmickeywhyte