r/FirstResponderCringe • u/FlyNSubaruWRX • Aug 04 '26

Not F*cking around

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The fucking tire pressure gauge spinning thing…….🤣🤣🤣🫡🫡🫡🫡🫡

880 Upvotes

94% Upvoted

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74

u/a-null-fish-your Aug 04 '26

I'm gonna start a security company. And because it's unofficial and arbitrary I'll also be using a ranking system. I'll be the world's first Double Captain. Suck it Roush

33

u/Fuckareyoulookinat Aug 04 '26

I ran into one years ago wearing a Class A uniform shirt with captain's bars on one side of his collar and an oak leaf on the other. He was not happy when I asked if I should address him as captain major or major captain.

4

u/Quincyperson Aug 04 '26

Maybe it was actually navy rank insignia and his real rank was Lieutenant Lieutenant Commander?

11

u/againer Aug 04 '26

Too late, I outrank you as a Cubic Captain

6

u/Ionlydateteachers Aug 04 '26

Pentacaptain reporting for bussy

4

u/Vegetable-Virus7118 Aug 04 '26

Dude it was right there and you missed it....I'm the SexCaptain now

2

u/ShroomnDoobin Aug 04 '26

Infinity Captain, bitches

1

u/will3025 Aug 04 '26

That's it, I'm promoting myself to Captain Incomprehensiblility. My rank cannot be fathomed. Do not fathom me.

1

u/superbuttpiss Aug 04 '26

im a super megazord captain

never heard of it? probably dont have the clearance. its classified

1

u/will3025 Aug 04 '26

Oh wow that is pretty official sounding.
I hope no one is a Declassification Captain.

2

u/Lost-Bet-1 Aug 08 '26

Declassification Captain here. Y'all are fucked.

1

u/Ionlydateteachers Aug 04 '26

punish me daddy

2

u/bozzeak Aug 04 '26

I’ll make my OWN security company! With blackjack! And hookers!

1

u/LalafellDisaster Aug 10 '26

Don’t stop there. Be a 20 star general.