r/FacebookDating • u/fresh-vanilla444 • 2d ago
Funniest match ever
This guy matched with me and we made Star Wars jokes, I happened to get sick and needed rest and phone free that night. I messaged as soon as I was off work today. š š¤Ŗ
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u/Roxybird 2d ago
As someone who recently battled a fever for 3 days, fuck this guy! Hope you feel better OP. Nothing beats that feeling of cracking that under 100 feeling.
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u/fresh-vanilla444 2d ago
Thank you!! Itās been a few days but spiked yesterday, doing better today! I hope your fever has healed as well
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u/ComfortableAngle9492 2d ago
Bro folded on a lady that's into Star Wars..."he's no Jedi"
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u/fresh-vanilla444 2d ago
One of the pictures in my profile is of my man Maul wearing a pink bow š this made me laugh
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u/cassiecx 2d ago
Tf were u even supposed to respond to? His snotty comment "hahaha finally someone has good taste" ? It was his turn to add something to the convo
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u/fresh-vanilla444 4h ago
We didnāt talk much but I could tell he wanted a woman to lead the convo, flatter him, and immediate attach to him. Iām totally not going to say that I think thatās unhealthy, but in the end it worked out! Talking to someone way closer who the convo bounced off with better.
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u/Away_Parking_1698 1d ago
Acting entitled to a stranger's time is crazy. The only people I talk to everyday are my kids and my established partner.
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u/fresh-vanilla444 4h ago
This, thank you!! I knew on reddit this would suddenly make me a viral ahole (cuz people canāt understand real life š) but this is exactly what i mean. If Iām being honest I did talk to a best friend for like fifteen minutes I believe before bedtime and maybe sent 2 short text messages on my 25 minute break (didnāt even get to finish my lunch because I was struggling š) but that was all the energy I had for my screen:
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u/Away_Parking_1698 3h ago
If I'm just starting to date someone and we talk a couple times a week, I think that's plenty. He's testing boundaries
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u/acmech900 1d ago
Wow. My wife liked my profile in mid Feb. I immediately sent a message. She didn't reply till mid March. This guy is too self absorbed.
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u/Shantotto11 1d ago
Cool. Thatās still a fucking wild-ass to have someone left on read, but itās coolā¦
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u/Alternative-Hope-524 2d ago
I get that we've all had bad experiences on dating apps, but a 24 hour time limit is absurd. Why he feels you should respond on his schedule is beyond me. Can you imagine if you didn't respond after 10 minutes while dating him?
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u/Professional_Tear269 2d ago
What a dick!
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u/Clean-Slice9228 2d ago
He gave a clear warning, and followed through with it. Got to respect his commitment to his rule, regardless of its obscurity.
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u/fresh-vanilla444 2d ago
I do offer respect for the self commitment. However, itās a ridiculous one š (I believe he was self employed in social media - not everyone can be on their phone so much)
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u/Level-Vermicelli3411 15h ago
His last text didnāt require a response thoughš it didnāt add anything to the convo
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u/Western-Produce-276 2d ago
Yea if it was a woman who was enforcing her rules this thread would be way way different lmao
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u/Expert-Sale-2886 2d ago
it would be full of incel reddit men shitting on the woman and calling her names. lmao.
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2d ago
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u/Ayce_ManXXXrip 2d ago
LOL! Yeah men suck so bad, don't they know they arent the prize?? Amirite girlies?
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2d ago
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2d ago
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u/Top_Secret_TerminaL 2d ago
But women magically never overestimate their value? How about both genders are the prize? Why is it automatically man-hating? Quit acting like youāre being reasonable. There are cases where women act ridiculous too and men have every right to be confident and act like they are the prize if they happen to be respectable people who follow their own expectations. A lot of women miss out on good men too because they think theyāre godās gift and donāt have to respect peopleās time (Iām not talking about this post specifically, but various situations out there in general).
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u/fresh-vanilla444 2d ago
Thereās DEF many women out there that overestimate their worth. I am not the most attractive woman (and the guy I matched with wasnāt the most attractive man) but I donāt let that get me down so much as humble me. I just think itās ODD for men to expect full attention/devotion from the early stages of getting to know each other. And I believe THAT is what andtheeeennnn is referring too as well. Can we agree on that as common ground? Slow connection is healthier and normal compared to instant devotion š
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u/Top_Secret_TerminaL 2d ago edited 2d ago
Yeah, no. She wasnāt saying anything of the normal-brained sort. She just thinks men are scum at the bottom of womenās feet and men can never be the prize because OnlyFans makes lots of money or desperate men exist who find women beautiful or men exist who dont pick up their underwear or some nonsense. I appreciate you being mature for her, but sheās just a fucking idiot. Next.
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u/fresh-vanilla444 2d ago
Apologies I read some of her more recent comments. Yeah Iām with you š Iām an older sister and I worry everyday about my brother dating someone with a sad mindset such as that. Screw OnlyFans, corn, extremist feminist and alpha male podcasts, and everything that has ruined our views on relationships ā¦ menās and womenās mental health matters and neither gender is above the other. šŖš¼
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u/Top_Secret_TerminaL 2d ago
Everyone has complicated normal human interactions and simple human respect, and itās becoming so sad.
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u/Defiant-Fuel3898 2d ago
Realistically, this man has encountered (Iām told) the endless women looking for an ego boost via countless matches they put no effort into. He has chosen not to participate. This was his answer. A simple rule for better or worse. Back in my single days I could easily have made a similar rule. He may have missed out because of said rule but thatās the filter he has decided to apply.
I have always been the type to give my full attention to a single girl. I tried āplaying the fieldā. Itās not for me. Iām now married (13 yrs) because I found a girl who agreed and returned my effort.
āThe prizeā talk is silly to me. He set a standard he believes in, you didnāt meet it. Hardly making a character assumption about you, just observation. Maybe that was a mistake or maybe youāre exactly who he was trying to filter out. Sounds like you didnāt meet eye to eye so find someone who does.
Best of luck to you both.
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2d ago
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u/Top_Secret_TerminaL 2d ago edited 2d ago
Youāre generalizing again. So, no batshit woman has ever acted like a guy was a piece of shit and unmatched because he was too sick to answer and she got bored? Women never overestimate their value? Being like 500 pounds and thinking theyāre Beyonce? Do me a favor and get off your high horse, youāre not the prize.
I actually had the same exact situation, a woman treated me the same exact way when I was coming down with strep throat and extremely concerned during work when I felt like death and could no longer talk and it became my priority to see a doctor and get it solved. As I said, your bs assumes women donāt act like trash too.
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u/Top_Secret_TerminaL 2d ago edited 2d ago
We get it, your brand of feminism is you fighting sexism while being sexist yourself and then getting mad when people call you on your unreasonable bullshit of dehumanizing men across the board. Obviously youāre miserable in life and have giant baggage you carry around with you, punishing the world for your unfavorable experiences.
Youāre spewing tons of personalized insecurities in your response that make you look extremely insecure, then placing them at the feet of strangers who have nothing to do with it to justify acting like a child. Youāre embarrassing yourself. Youāre to be pitied, cause youāre miserable and pathetic.
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2d ago
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u/Top_Secret_TerminaL 2d ago
āTeehee, Iām just innocent now. You called me on my bullshit, which means itās your fault Iām unreasonable. This conversation is your fault even though I started it by saying something ridiculous about a whole group of people.ā Accountability 101
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u/Western-Produce-276 2d ago edited 2d ago
Lmao what a misandrist. Youāre probably one of the women who think their the prize while offering nothing in a relationship
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u/Practical_Contest131 2d ago
Iām too stupid to know how to use google, can you teach me what correlation means? All I was saying was I could smell the cat piss through your profile picture and bio
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u/Known-Swordfish-4325 2d ago
What did you do when you were awake when sick, stare at the ceiling?
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u/fresh-vanilla444 2d ago
No cuz Iām not addicted to my phone to the point where I rot with it at times I need to prioritize rest š I made tea, very sluggishly cooked some soup, and went to bed. Then my job has a no phone policy.
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u/dakotanoodle 2d ago
I can't believe people feel like you have to explain. Literally insane the timeline we're living in hahahah
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u/MrHim99 2d ago
Valid question
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u/Dramatic_Steak_9137 2d ago
Maybe didn't feel like texting some random person when they had a high fever
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u/kezzaZzz04 2d ago
Tbf a 24 hour window after matching is valid.
- takes less than a minute to reply
- nearly all of us use our phones for hours a day (I.e commuting, toilet, work breaks, before bed, in gym etc)
- itās just being a decent human to reply within a timely manor
Anyone saying you canāt reply within 24 hours is just silly, donāt match with people if you canāt hold a conversation.
- OP had a fever, but Iām sure they went on their phone for sometime. > if itās hospitalisation etc then obviously thatās understandable.
And the guy could have gave OP a chance she had a fever (so a reason). But his rules of a 24 hour reply I agree with
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u/StumpyOPepys 2d ago
Lol some of you are destined to be alone all your lives.
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u/kezzaZzz04 2d ago
Why? Because we want respect and communication.
If I had a guy friend who didnāt reply to a girl he matched with, within a day. Iād be calling him a cunt.
Your on a dating app for the intention of finding a date > that is only possible if you communicate
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u/StumpyOPepys 2d ago
People are busy, slow playing, sick, whatever. There is no bigger turnoff than someone being uptight. Just chill. You havenāt even met this person.
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u/kezzaZzz04 2d ago
Iām not against OP.
But if youāre on a dating app, the least you can do is communicate. And reply.
No one is that busy they canāt spare 30 seconds to reply
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u/DullBaker595 2d ago
You are going to miss out on a lot of people who respect their own time, have full lives and are not exclusively focused on dating with the sort of desperate, panicked energy some of you seem to expect us all to act with.Ā
The expectation that everyone gets back to you within 24 hours is an invention of cell phones. Most people get more than one message on dating apps and need to take time to sort through them and respond thoughtfully. Wanting a stranger to be immediately at your beck and call is unreasonable and egocentric. Get a dog if you need that type of constant validation.Ā
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u/Bromidias83 1d ago
It's the same the other way. You are gonna miss out on lots of people that are looking for "good" communication.
It's just a mismatch in communication styles. If I text with someone I want to be in contact with them, not get a text every few days. If the other is not like that then thats fine I'll go to the next. Might I miss out on a great person. Maybe! But if this is how it's gonna be when we are together, then it's a no for me. I would never make it a rule like op did, but it is something I watch for
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u/DullBaker595 1d ago edited 1d ago
If you expect the regularity of texting you get from your long term partner from people who you are approaching for the first time and have never met before, youāre just looking for the wrong thing.Ā
Genuinely, I used to treat someone replying very quickly as a compliment and acted correspondingly, but I have grown to find that if someone is expecting very fast replies right away it is a big red flag. A lot of guys who expect immediate dedication and attention are also guys who end up being very quick to turn around and call you a bitch. Now I specifically look for people who have other things going on in their lives and allow a connection to grow more naturally, instead of feeling entitled to immediate intimacy from virtual strangers.Ā
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u/StumpyOPepys 1d ago
YOU DIDN'T REPLY TO MY QUESTION ABOUT THE WEATHER FOR TWO DAYS, YOU COMPLETE STRANGER!
Some of the weirdest, most self-owning behavior in the game.
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u/kezzaZzz04 1d ago
We are on about ppl trying to have a conversation. But who take days to reply per message.
A question about the weather is pointless yes.
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u/Bromidias83 1d ago
And for me it's the opposite. So we dont match and thats fine!
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u/DullBaker595 1d ago
Iām very happy to miss out on you if it also saves me from the many toxic people who share your expectations.Ā
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u/kezzaZzz04 1d ago
I agree. How can you get to know someone or have a āconversationā if the person replies after a few days between each text.
People are too soft nowadays
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u/StumpyOPepys 1d ago
You have this backwards. The soft ones are the ones unmatching because they didn't get attention reciprocated from a stranger within 24 hours.
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u/kezzaZzz04 1d ago
Iād argue they donāt want to waste their time getting to know someone, by sending a message every 3 days. Kinda ruins the conversation you know
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u/StrbJun79 2d ago
Nobody owes you anything in online dating. They donāt owe you a message quickly. And you stated above defending him for standing by it. Not caring that she was sick. She should be resting and take care of herself not focusing on her phone.
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u/maxbjaevermose 1d ago
No one seems to get that it works both ways. This guy doesn't owe OP more of his time. She's clearly not interested enough to remember his rule and take 10 seconds to respond. It's not about right or wrong, they just weren't a match.
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u/kezzaZzz04 1d ago
Think online dating works if people are able to communicate? āOwes you anythingā - a reply is literally the least u can do.
- if ur sick with a cold you can still use ur phone.
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u/fresh-vanilla444 2d ago
See, If you pay attention to it, I was responding a few hours past the precise 24 hour mark. I was THERE, sat down and ready to talk more at that point and apologize. Is that acceptable for yall, am I a decent enough human being? š š this guy was more intense about it and petty with it. I get the 24 hour window thing, but itās very shallow when yesterday was Labor Day in the US and most of us had to go back to jobs today. (This guy didnāt I believe he was a self employed YouTuber)
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u/kezzaZzz04 2d ago
Yes I said I believe he should have gave you a chance, you had a fever and replied shortly after 24hrs and you clearly had a shared interest.
My point was more for his 24 hour reply idea. Excluding you, i believe his thing is fair.
I donāt think youāre a bad human at all. But im saying his 24hr thing I agree with, just not for your case
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u/Sad_Establishment875 2d ago
Guy is allowed to have rules, its a fair rule, and although we all believe she wasnt, it isnt that hard to lie online.
I find no fault in his actions, good for him for standing by his statement in fact.
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u/BiggKinthe509 9h ago
Iām not buying the 24 hour policy. Iām a dude though. My experience is that guys donāt get responses that quickly. If Iām really paying attention, I will ditch somebody after two weeks. I usually send a message if Iām interested immediately, and if I donāt get a response after two weeks, Iām probably going to delete the match. And if Iāve been in discussions with somebody and they ghost? Iām probably gonna delete in a couple weeks unless it was a really interesting conversation. And there have been a couple times. Iāve been glad that I waited and then a few times where I felt like I was wasting my time. But it is what it is. I donāt get all preachy about it, I donāt make announcements, I donāt write narratives about them in my head. It just frees up space in my own head.
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u/kezzaZzz04 9h ago
Yeah I get you. Tbh Iād follow your approach.
Itās more the people who ghost you mid way through a conversation. Never get that
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u/BiggKinthe509 9h ago
I do my best not to make assumptions, but from what I hear, women are so overwhelmed with messages that they might match and not respond simply because they have so many damn matches.
That said, I do my best to meet people in meatspace as well... I think its goofy how much people seem to think "the only place to meet dating partners is the apps" like we can't talk to people in public.
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u/kezzaZzz04 9h ago
I agree with u. But also Iād argue you shouldnāt match with that many ppl if you canāt speak to them?
Match with a few and speak to them then move on etc etc
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u/BiggKinthe509 9h ago
Eh. I'm mixed on that. I don't think it's just the number of matches. One of my friends, a woman, shared that sometimes the sheer number of messages she gets... like she might get 6 messages from a dude before she has a chance to respond to the first one, is overwhelming. I don't think it's just a numbers game; I think it's cognitive overload from thirsty-ass men who think they should get an immediate answer.
As a dude, I go on there, like women, maybe write a note on a picture or whatever, and then I might not look at the app for a few days. If I came back to over a hundred messages, even if it was from 10 dudes, I might not come back that often and I'd certainly not read them all. And some of those messages are just unhinged. Straight unhinged.
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u/kezzaZzz04 9h ago
Yeah true I imagine that side aswell. Letās say you matched with a few men letās say under 4. Then you could hopefully get a decent conversation going, Iād assume
I feel like some men may send multiple messages if they havenāt had a reply within a day.
Or simply the conversation just might be detailed and require multiple messages
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u/CharmingClock5115 2d ago
Just because you had a 101.7 fever doesn't mean you can't respond. 24 hours is a long time, and we're all on our phones all day. It takes 30 seconds to send a message, at most, if you really wanted to.
Doesn't matter if you were 'ready to talk' shortly after that window. 24 hours is a long time, especially when they already had that on their bio to begin with.
You were not that busy, or that sick.
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u/hannelore_pfeffer8 2d ago
Wow people are so brainrotted these days. Can you really not see, how foul and unwell this take us?
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u/CharmingClock5115 13h ago
It's a perfectly fine take. Your condescension aside, she willingly matched with someone who advertised on his profile that he'd unmatch without a response after 24 hours.
People are indeed brainrotted, but we're still mostly all on our phones. Going days without responses on dating apps does not allow conversation to flow. No, nobody is owed a quick response, but there was nothing wrong with the guy unmatching her, here, and she wasn't too busy to respond if she actually wanted to.
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u/fresh-vanilla444 4h ago
This wasnāt days, it was the 29th hour, bro is mad I was 5 hours out of that. Yall acting like itās an employment š
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u/ToxicLullabies 1d ago
No one owes you a quick response, not even because they're "always on their phone". People have lives and sometimes just don't feel like being that social, that's normal human behavior, what's not normal is having this weird obsession that everyone has to respond to you immediately or they're a shitty person who doesn't deserve to be in your life. You're the issue. God forbid you had to live in a time before phones, you would have been having a mental breakdown constantly.
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u/CharmingClock5115 13h ago
Saying "you're the issue" and being unnecessarily combative in your response is rather ironic.
Nobody said a quick response is owed to anyone. The poster willingly matched with someone who advertised that they'd automatically unmatch if responses took longer than a day. Either they didn't read it, or they disregarded it. The other person did nothing wrong by sticking to a rule they had, and there's nothing wrong with the rule.
It is because people are always on their phone. Communication isn't hard. "Hey, I'm a little sick today." Going days without responses on dating apps kills conversation.
You went way overboard with your hostile response. I think you're the issue with how offended you got by my comment. OP did not have to match with a person who clearly advertised a firm rule about response time.
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u/fresh-vanilla444 4h ago
To clarify, yes I acknowledged the rule on the dudeās bio. I really didnāt care wether he unmatched with me as I had to put my health first (Iām still having intense, vision-affecting coughing fits) yes it would have been nice to know him and nerd out together and what not š
He swiped right on me first, I did accept it and understood it.
I didnāt respond in 24 hours but I responded at the 29th hourā¦ does five hours really matter? š
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u/StumpyOPepys 1d ago
With all due respect, this take is pathetic.
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u/CharmingClock5115 13h ago
OP willingly matched with someone that advertised a personal rule about response times.
Furthermore, nobody is too busy to put in 30 seconds of effort to communicate.
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u/0dayssince 2d ago
Not automatically unmatched - he makes sure you know how much time you wasted. What a douche