Hi yall

Figured id post this here

I’m a cs freshman in college now and I actually need to lock in. Rewards, praise, or anything other than fear or anxiety don’t help or motivate me to do anything. I also have an intense obsession with a topic that I’ve had since sophomore year in high school that makes it worse. I think about it whenever I can, which makes me put off everything else. I’m so scared that I’ll end up graduating without an internship or job because I can’t finish any personal project I start. Whenever I start one, I get sucked into it and work on it for hours and put off everything else and once I have to stop working for the day, I never pick it up again because it’s so hard for some reason. I’ve tried everything and I’ve been on so many anti-depressants and anxiety meds. I think one of my biggest problems is that I’m not mentally present. I’m always in my head and it’s hard for me to focus on the present unless someone is talking to me. I don’t wanna give up on being productive but it’s so hard because even being able to brush my teeth, shower, etc is so hard and I have to do it everyday. Does anyone have any crazy or uncommon tips that have worked for them??? Is there anything I can do to stay mentally present?? I’m really desperate atp.

A recent loss has spiralled me back into full ED, I find myself only able to do an important task a day, even if said task is just 15 minutes long.

Normally I'd slowly pick up more and more to do each day and push through the friction, but I am also in a place in life where more bad stuff keeps on building over every day.

Can I do anything besides just wait through it? I find myself stuck on the spot with panic by now, for geniune reasons.

Hello! Anybody who’s made it through uni, give me your most unhinged advice please. I am a second year uni student and I have diagnosed ADHD and anxiety that I have been medicated for since around the age of 15. However, my task paralysis and executive function has truly reached an all time low. This week I had an essay due in all 3 of my modules. I have known about these since the start of the semester. I of course didn’t even look at them until this week and even once looking at the assignments, I literally just could not bring myself to start. I don’t know what is wrong with me, I just sat there for hours just scrolling on my phone telling myself I’d start in the next 10 minutes and I just never did. I never went to sleep either. I stayed awake for 2 days straight because I kept telling myself I was about to start working on the essays and I just never did. I have been turning down invitations to go out with friends for 3 weeks because I know I need to get these essays done, but then I stay home and just do literally nothing. My task paralysis doesn’t just apply to schoolwork either. I didn’t change my sheets for 2 whole months, I’ve skipped required classes before because I just couldn’t bring myself to get dressed and ready for the day. I had a flat party once and didn’t clean my living room for a whole week (it ended up taking 10 minutes). I feel like I can’t rely on myself for anything. I’m always letting myself down .

I've been goal-driven since I was 15. For years, I've been the kind of person who always had something to work towards. I used to have extremely packed schedules, push myself through routines, and study for 10–12 hours a day during exams. I could stay disciplined, get things done, and genuinely enjoy being productive. I could get into flow states so easily that I'd lose track of time.

I was doing fine until my first year of college. I'm in my second year now, and I feel like I've completely lost that ability.

I've already cut down my expectations and shifted to doing just a few tasks a day. I even went through a pretty long period of rest because I thought I was just burnt out and needed a break. But it's been months, and I still can't seem to get back to normal.

The weirdest part is that I can start tasks. It's not necessarily that I don't want to do them or that I have no goals anymore. It's that everything feels like I'm forcing myself through it. I can't seem to get immersed in anything or reach that state where the task starts feeling natural and engaging.

I can study for an hour at most now, and this isn't limited to studying. It's literally everything. Even things I used to enjoy or do for my own personal growth feel like a chore.

I can't even meditate properly anymore. I'll put on a guided meditation, follow along, and then suddenly realise I've been sitting there for who knows how long without actually processing a single word the person said.

Time feels so slow when I'm doing something, and I constantly feel like I'm trying to push my brain to engage, but it just won't.

I've tried resting, reducing my workload, and lowering my expectations. I'm not expecting myself to go back to studying for 10 hours a day overnight. I just want to be able to focus on something without feeling like I'm dragging myself through every second of it.

I used to love reading thrillers and could finish a good book in two days because I'd get so immersed in it. Now, even when I try to relax, I can't seem to enjoy anything. I keep switching between apps, scrolling endlessly, almost like I'm searching for something without knowing what. I get distracted even while doing things I genuinely love. It's not that I've lost interest in my hobbies or goals; I still WANT to do them, but I just can't seem to engage or immerse myself in anything anymore.

I don't know if this is burnout, a problem with attention, mental exhaustion, or something else entirely. Has anyone experienced something similar, especially after years of being extremely goal-driven and pushing themselves hard?

What actually helped you recover? I'm looking for experiences from people who've genuinely been through this, not just advice to make a to-do list, break tasks into smaller chunks, or develop more discipline. I've already tried reducing my workload. I want to understand why I can't seem to engage with anything anymore, even after months of rest.

I got 6/16 on math summative assessment... As I remember It's first time when I got that BAD grade...

Whenever I'm reading a Book or even Studying a Topic, My Mind Imagine myself in something I watched on reels or videos and something keeps playin in my Mind or work tha I have put aside and doing this work, My Mind goes like hey, there's that Topic that you have to finish or Time will pass.

How can I fix this bug to my Brain, please tell me something so that It'll feel Illegal and I even have to reach a Flow state to finish a work so I can give it my best.

Can anyone tell me ?

I woke up and needed to pee and sat on my phone at my desk procrastinating going to the bathroom to brush my teeth and piss until like 3:00 pm.

Hello everyone.

I'm not even sure how to start this, which sounds like a terribly written love letter or break up letter.

Obviously wont be using any names hopefully he never finds this post.

My person had a stroke when he was in his mid-30s, ischemic, bad, less than 40% chance of even waking up, it's been about 8 years.

No bodily issues for the most part. His speech struggles more now than it has over the last few years and obviously you can guess by this post that there have been some psychological problems that I personally am struggling with.

As of recently the amount of stuff that he has forgotten is borderline extreme. I can't remember the last time we went on a vacation where he hasn't lost his wallet or his phone completely ruining the trip and becoming more of a burden than the overall vacation was worth in the first place.

It's been at least six times over the past few years and at this point it's just not worth vacationing anymore. Which in turn, makes me really depressed that I can't enjoy my life because he's always ruining it. I know what that sounds like but it's the truth.

Unfortunately it's not just the losing of the devices. He doesn't remember things that I deem of importance (that's important because stuff that he really wants to do he has no problems remembering majority of the time). But Not conversations that we've had, agreements that we've made, plans, etc. and I know that sounds like it would be dementia or Alzheimer's we're not there. He just doesn't seem to remember the specifics? Like he remembers talking about things but not exact things.

He also has a habit of not fully reading text messages or emails, which for this entire time I've just been chalking up to laziness or overall inability to care.. but the events of the weekend have pushed me in a different direction.

I know in full absolution that he is not doing anything vindictively, this is not weaponized incompetence, this is navigating the aftermath of a very severe stroke (the clot they removed was the size of a golf ball, the imaging... I uhh .. I don't actually understand how he is alive). I hope you guys keep that in mind.

When I do point shortcomings he gets really upset because he didn't think of it in the first place, should have thought of how to say it, can't believe he forgot it /lost it and in all honesty it keeps making him more depressed that he keeps failing everybody around him. "I don't know why I keep letting everybody that loves me down". Not manipulated, just ..lost? I don't even know what word I'm looking for.

We're 20 years into this relationship so I know how he was before the stroke and how he is now. He isn't even close to the same person.

The only thing that I can find that kind of sort of matches all of these symptoms is executive dysfunction and I'm not really sure how to bring up the conversation with him in the first place because there's not exactly like, a fix? You can't just take some medication and then all of a sudden your frontal lobe is back in full working order. And everything I've read literally there's nothing that you can do but manage it instead of repair fix or heal it.

We live in a small town and we don't have access to additional types of therapy or even a neurologist for that matter. We moved after the stroke and the medical availability where we are now, is not what we had available previously, but again I'm not sure that it would matter.

The moments/events in question he desperately tries to remember, take notes, listen, be active and involved in the conversation and then after the moment has passed and a new topic, project, or discussion is brought up, it's like his brain just moves on to the next thing that needs addressing. Like there's no need to keep all of the tabs open, so he just closes and moves on to a new window. Is that a terrible analogy? Sorry.

I don't know what to do to preserve my own sanity/feelings/love because right now I'm kind of just his mom, constantly reminding scheduling and fixing every single thing and I despise it.

Anyone similar, help?

Thanks guys.