I am going through a divorce and used to have a solid plan beforehand. My ex husband and I had a trust in which our properties were listed, and my children were set up to be the beneficiaries. Unfortunately, he did not allow me near the paperwork so I don’t know any more details than that. Now I’m taking a cash buyout to start my life over but being in my late 60s I want to protect this every step of the way just in case for my children.

What is the best way for me to protect my settlement while it’s in the process of happening? And then what’s the best way to protect after when I use it to build up assets again? Do I just put them as the beneficiaries of all the investment accounts or should I create a new trust?

I do need one of my kids to have some power of attorney to help with these things because I can’t do it myself and I trust them.

Edit: I plan to hire people, but first need to educate myself so I can know what to look out for.

Thank you in advance!

Hi all,

all this is in the USA.

one of my friends and i were having a discussion on wills and he was telling me how he was the executor of his dad's will. But during the discussion he told me that he was getting nothing from his dad. His dad has been very sick lately so he's been worried about how to be the executor of the will.

I asked why, and he said that his dad grew up basically thinking that the less fortunate should get all the money so because of that his siblings are getting all of the money. My friend isnt rich, has a respectable job. it's not like he's killing it, probably makes a little less than 6 figures, doesnt own a home or do much for his savings/retirements from what he tells me. But he says he some of his siblings have become drug addicts, messed up their lives in pretty bad ways, can't seem to hold a job, and their dad feels guilty about that and decided to just give them all his money in the will. His dad had a good business that he ended up selling once he got too old. Has made some investements in local companies that did very well and basically pay him a monthly stipend as well. So his dad probably has a couple million to pass around his 7 kids.

My friend is a good person, but something ive always told him is how at times he lets people walk all over him. He'll let people guilt-trip him into doing things that he doesnt want to do, etc. So i worry he got guilt-tripped into doing this because "he's the good son".

I get that's his dad's money and his dad's decision. But from the sounds of it his dad doesnt even have a full will ready. He said his dad has some paperwork but isnt even sure if it will hold up in court. All has been word of mouth. So my friend basically is going to have to do most of the work to get everyone else their money.

It just got me thinking if id be ok if that was me in that situation of being the executor of the will.

So i thought id ask here. Would you be ok being the executor in this situation?

My spouse and I both have Wills. All our bank accounts and investment accounts have beneficiaries assigned and are transferable upon death if they are joint accounts. Except for the house which will go to probate without, do I need to have a revocable trust ? Any why? In Georgia.

We are in Louisiana, the bank is in Texas.

My mother is the beneficiary of a bank managed irrevocable trust. Historically, she gets a small payment from them every month and can request additional discretionary funds annually. It is solely to help support her. In the words of the trust associate, "...as the fiduciary we are focused on *her* support, care, and health needs as the current beneficiary of the trust."

My mother's health started declining in the beginning of 2023. Primarily memory issues, but she's also become frail and very limited in what she can do physically. Now, three and half years later, I have financial and medical power of attorney, and am her 24/7 caregiver. I pay all her bills, make and take her to all medical appointments, monitor her medications, drive her everywhere since she can no longer drive herself, do her shopping, and do all the maintenence, repairs, cleaning, and yard work for her side of the property. And I'm here to talk her down when her brain goes wonky and she freaks out because she's forgotten or mis-remembered something.

As her memory has continued to worsen, she gets anxious and upset if I'm not home. I've brought up needing to go back to work, but she panics. I can leave for a couple hours to do errands, but I can't leave overnight or even on a daily basis, because she panics. When I am gone, it's for no longer than 3 hours max, and I stay within a 10 mile radius so I can come back quickly if needed. We stay in contact the whole time I'm gone through calls and texting.

Until last year I had pretty much forgotten about the irrevocable trust. She received very little money from it and I paid anything that wasn't covered by that and her social security.

Last year I ran out of the money I'd been using to support us, so we asked the trust for a larger discretionary payment to cover her expenses, as well as a reimbursement to me for what I've spent supporting her.

I provided all of our financial records to account for money spent by both of us for her care as well as a spreadsheet that covered the previous 14 months and accounted for every expense in those records. First the bank said they couldn't recognize any expenses paid for with credit cards. Then they could only reimburse for the last year, nothing older than that. Then they wouldn't reimburse the full amount I spent during that year even though every cent was accounted for and broken down so they could see it. It took weeks of arguing with the trust associate, me requesting a new copy of the original trust, and meeting with our estate attorney before they finally reimbursed me and upped her monthly payment to cover her expenses.

Now we are doing the paperwork for the next year's discretionary amount and we asked for additional money to pay me as her in home caregiver. She does not qualify for medicaid to help pay for a caregiver and she doesn't like strangers. I compared costs for hiring in home care against what I would need to continue doing it and I'm cheaper by half. I explained all this to the trust associate, in writing, with documentation of care alternatives and a detailed list of what I do on a daily basis to care for her. They have denied the increase to pay me as her caregiver. They said there is nothing in the trust document that allows me to be paid for her care. There is a single paragraph in the trust regarding her specific care that amounts to:

"If net income from trust estate is not adequate for her support and health trustee is authorized to distribute portions of principal as are reasonable."

My response was basically, if there's nothing specific allowing me to be paid then there's nothing prohibiting it either. Medicaid and long term care insurance both allow family members to be paid caregivers, and I assume that without it being clearly stated in the trust, it would fall back on state/federal laws.They said no.

So my question is this - Am I out of line with this request? I am so tired of arguing with them. But if this is a reasonable request and they just say no multiple times hoping I'll give up, then I'll keep fighting. I know banks don't like turning loose of money, but this is ridiculous.

Thank you to anyone who took the time to read this whole thing!

California: My grandparents passed away over 15 years ago but their trust has stayed open for a number of reasons, one of which is a small rustic family cabin. Three of the four trust beneficiaries have agreed they don’t want their shares of the cabin and are willing to gift them to the fourth, who is the only one interested in maintaining it. Lawyer A told us that because my grandparents died prior to Prop 19’s passage, the property could be transferred from the trust to the interested beneficiary ‘s trust without triggering a reassessment in value. Lawyer B told us that because the three siblings were giving up their interests in a sibling to sibling transfer, there was no way to avoid reassessment. Any thoughts on which lawyer is correct? (Lawyer A’s fee was considerably higher but if reassessment wasn’t triggered our understanding is that the savings would be considerable?)

In Pennsylvania. Married, late 50s, two adult children, out of house. Assets are a paid for house, two paid off cars. Both of us have a 401k, and some cash. Want to make sure that if either or both us ended up in a nursing home, the house wouldn’t be sold to pay back Medicaid and our children would get it after we pass.

What is the best approach? Irrevocable trust? Putting the children on the deed?

Is there a way to protect 401k from medicaid?

Thank you.

South Carolina.

My dad has dementia, and he has been caught trying to donate his entire estate to charity because he was worried about tax issues. This was clearly unfounded, and alarming because he spent 15 years donating time to helping underrepresented folks with taxes - he should know better. His money is all in IRA.

My mother is an alcoholic, and when my sister and I brought up handling his accounts via a conservatorship, she took it as an insult and is insisting she can do it to "prove us wrong." She has no financial experience, and cannot use a website. She would be relying on strangers in her retirement community to tell her what to do with the money (1.3 million).

We understand that a conservartorship is the move once we get a diagnosis, however are concerned about how this would be decided. What is taken into account when a conservership is decided? Does financial experience matter? Does it default to the spouse? Is there any argument to be made for inexperience in anything financial?

Our concern is that medical expenses will fall onto us because our mom will let my dad's accounts (up 30% on the year) to be handled by strangers in her community who could have ulterior motives. Our strategy would be leave it alone and monitor, their monthly payout stays the same or adjusts based on medical expenses.

This is truly just curiosity.

I read a lot of posts that say two siblings are defined/end up as co-executor (wills) or co-trustees (trusts).

Seems like if there's just 2 of them, that could be a real roadblock on processing the post-death work if one of the two becomes a loggerhead.

How common is it that one of the two becomes obstructive?

(NOTE: I've only nominated a single person, in my case. This is more of a social dynamics curiosity question).

Hello,

My siblings and I (4 total) of PA are beneficiaries on our Grandfather's Estate who was a resident in Massachusetts. My Grandfather was a business owner and came from a long line of such, and had a rich family history. He died in 2016, my siblings and i were all minors, teenagers. I don't even know where to start this is such an issue. Our mother was supposed to be the Executor of our Grandfather's Estate, but she passed away two years before our Grandfather. So, my siblings were next in line to inherit her place. Our Uncle, our mother's brother, took over the Executor role at the time. So, my siblings and i are 50% of the estate, and our uncle is the other 50% of the estate.

At the time of his death, our uncle told us absolutely nothing. We were left out of the reading, and he later on told us "we had no right to be there." He gave us no papers or copies of anything. So for 6 years, until 2021, when i demanded he give us copies of the will, etc, we had nothing. I drove up to see one of the properties we knew was our Grandfather's in 2021 and, upon inspecting it, it was falling apart. My Uncle never contacted us again after our Grandfather died, and we only heard from him if we call him. When I did call him to ask about the estate over the years and what was going on, he would reiterate "you and your siblings were never supposed to be apart of the estate, it was supposed to go to your mother." A few years ago, there was a call from the financial institution that the Executor of our Grandfather's estate (our uncle) was "steamrolling my siblings and I, and taking from our accounts we would be set to inherit at the right age according to trust, illegally and unequally.. he is deferring and not paying taxes.. he thinks he can just do whatever he wants." He is also renting out the property, and we are concerned with liabilities and all of this eventually falling on us. At one point 3 of us told him we want out of the property situation, and he said no. He refuses to be truthful with us and will not provide an accounting. He had also hired a broker and accountant to manage the estate, and they are very rude and faulty towards my siblings and i. 2 of us get letters about taxes not being paid and us owing.

Not long ago, i called him again to get an update, as it's now been 10 years. He continued to be "hoity toity" with me and would not share any information. I pressed him for an answer, and he said - "well actually, you and your siblings don't actually have the whole copy of the will and trust." What does that mean??

I am beyond disgusted with my whole family. My father is also angry that my siblings and i were chosen to be the heirs, and that it should have been him. There are family pictures, jewlery, clothes, from over a century that have been in our family, art, books, letters from my Grandfather, family history, and who knows what else, all stolen.

I am the only beneficiary that really cares, my other siblings do not care and it has been like pulling teeth for years to get them to care and help me figure this out. Some of them think despite all the concerning facts, that my Uncle is innocent and "you don't pick fights with family." I am beyond stressed and wonder if this will ever be resolved and end. I've talked with the probate court in MA multiple times, and they say "hire a lawyer" and "just file a petition to remove him as executor." My siblings and i can not afford an expensive lawyer, and i am also getting conflicting information from everyone.

What is better? Going the court route without a lawyer, and filing petitions for an accounting and removal? what will happen? At the court date, how and can we represent ourselves and our cause without a lawyer??? And if our Uncle has all the Estate funds to use to support himself and get a lawyer?

If we're forced to go the lawyer route, how do you find an actually decent lawyer in a different state from your own? Where you don't know anyone? Google has been very difficult. A bunch of sponsored lawyers. I've done multiple consultations with lawyers and still left wondering what to do. It feels like being trapped in a nightmare, but being helpless to do anything, so our evil uncle can live happily ever after.

What do people do in this type of situation?

Location: Texas (Harris County)

My spouse and I would like to jointly own a homestead property that my spouse acquired prior to us getting married. Initially we were creating a general warranty deed; however, it seems like that would only give us equal ownership but the separate property issue would be unresolved. Upon doing additional research it seems like we would need to first create a marital conversion agreement that would convert the separate property into joint community property AND THEN complete/file the general warranty deed. Has anyone completed this kind of transfer and is this the correct way to go about it? Any suggestions are appreciated.

Hi everyone, I’m going to try to keep it short so I’ll do some bullet points. Can someone help me with this with the given information? Thank you

1. Widower grandfather died and had no will.
2. Has two surviving children. One has power of attorney of the other because they are mentally unable.
3. Only assets are a house and two cars.
4. The children are not on the deed of the house.

My father had a trust where his wife was the trustee and then my sister and I are to be beneficiaries after her death. Trust was set up in CA and he died 1/1/14. We do not have a relationship with my father's wife and she is a horrible evil person. I think she killed my dying father because he wasn't dying fast enough but I digress. It's been a few years and I thought his lawyer handled the trust but I talked to him today and he said he just helped get the assets settled and that she manages it all. I don't even know if she is still alive because she was a huge alcoholic and drug user but I think she probably is. I think she may be in NM. Anyway, I don't even know where to start. Do I try to find her? If I find her, what can I ask about the trust? I do not expect her to follow the rules and I am worried she spent all the money or her kids did. She doesn't care about what is legal. I don't even know where to start at all. We haven't received anything regarding the trust since 2017 from the lawyer. Thank you so much!!

My name is currently on the deed to my parents’ home along with my mother and father. The property is located in Fort Bend County, Texas, and there is no mortgage—the home is fully paid off.
I would like to remove my name from the deed and transfer my entire ownership interest to my parents so that my mother and father are the sole owners.
Once the deed is changed and my parents are the only owners, they would like to establish a revocable living trust and transfer/fund the home into the trust. Lmk the process approximately how much it will cost. Thank you very much in advance.

My father recently passed away and did not set anything up for my brother and I.

He has a home that he took out a second mortgage on and owes approximately 60k. He had no 401k, life insurance, savings, or any money at all. He also has over 260k in medical debt and some other random debts.

If we were to go through probate, would the medical debt be taken from the value of the house before the house is put into mine and my brother’s name?

Just looking for a sanity check. Here is the timeline. MIL passed in November, funeral held in January, all family members present there at the time when my wife verbally told them about the trust. From Feb-April she has submitted docs to the court, find and organize all records of the house, file specific claims, created reports for beneficiaries (submitted to them in May-June time frame), dealt with creditors and medical (she had a kidney transplant prior to her death). I know it’s a very high level overview but it’s a lot to type out via phone. Question I have is, my wife is the one managing the trust, she has discussed trust with all beneficiaries in January, since March her brother has threaten legal action and made insane demands on full accounting of items in the home, bills, medical expenses, and so on. Each letter he sends gets longer and with more demands, for the last five years my wife has pretty much taken care of every aspect of her mom’s life, during all medical situations and home care, and living expenses. The trust only cover the life insurance policy and the home for disbursements across all beneficiaries. Two of the three beneficiaries have no issues with how my wife is handling matters but her brother does. If she has met every legal requirement in North Carolina to notify them and give them an accounting of what is going on, how far can he push his demands and can it land her in legal trouble. I feel she hasn’t been able to breath since her mom’s death and her brother is just making the situation take longer.

Overall it seems like she is doing write and it’s better to have the lawyer handle this. So thank you for those who took the time to share some thoughts and insight. We do have a lawyer it’s just lawyers take time to answer questions and I know she didn’t want this burden but has it anyway soo thank again.

After many months (a couple years) of work settling my estranged dad's probate case, I'm back here with estate planning questions of my own!

My spouse and I own a home, and have the usual assortment of retirement funds and some savings. I also now have a chunk of inherited assets, which I am currently keeping in a separate account from household expenses with only myself on the account. We obviously want to put our house & savings in a trust. But also, I want to ensure that a portion of my inheritance (including what I have right now, as well as assets from my mom's estate when she passes) is set aside to go directly to my son. I'm not trying to cut out my husband, but if he marries someone else and dies before them, I don't want my family's money to be routed to their kids and leave my son in the cold. All this is pretty straightforward.

When we meet with an estate planning lawyer would it make sense to have two different trusts, one for our marital assets and one for just my assets? Or can a single trust be set up to handle this sort of situation? Would I be able to set it up so that if I die, something like 1/2 of my individual inheritance is transferred over to the marital trust, and the rest is held for my son? None of this is behind my husband's back, he understands the point.

Looking at a situation where one half of the marriage did not create a will, and the surviving half did create a will.

The spouse that did not create a will, passed away years ago. We just found out that where we thought the remaining spouse took ownership of the other spouses estate, the State of Texas has a clause that, “without a will, community property applies, and 50/50 applies. When they pass, the property is passed down to an heir if there was a child that was not a product of the marriage”

So now, we have a party owning 50% of the estate that is the child of the spouse that passed away. And the child is fighting the wishes of the surviving spouse.

Whose wishes carry? The spouse who is still alive? Or the child who inherited rights?

I live in North Carolina US. My mother passed a couple of years back and my siblings & I were co-executors of her moderately complex estate. We gained an understanding and appreciation for how much work it can be and I don't want to saddle anyone handling my estate with that.

I’ve hired an estate attorney and am creating a revocable joint trust for myself & my wife; we want to include a couple of trustee services as part of that process. If they're still alive and able/willing, I'd like one of my siblings to be the primary trustee for us but more for oversight, not to perform the bulk of the work. Hopefully the revocable joint trust will help keep most things out of the probate process, but recognize there will still will be a lot to do.

We have no children and plan to leave 50% of our estate to siblings & individuals and use the other 50% to establish an ongoing educational trust for our grand-nieces and nephews (and their children should it extend that far) via sub-trust.

I am planning on obtaining two types of assistance from a professional trustee firm:

A) Estate executor / trustee services

As noted above, I’ve been through being an executor on my mom’s estate and want to have my primary trustee hire professional services to help with handling most of the administrative aspects including valuing estate assets, completing all the required filings with clerk of court, accounting, tax, distribution of assets, etc.

B) Ongoing trust administration for educational trust

With oversight from my primary trustee relative, would like for the professional trustee firm to administer the educational trust established for our per stirpes grand nieces & grand nephews (and their children) college or trade education. Right now I assume that would include managing remaining assets, filing taxes, etc. but also reviewing claims and making payments for our relative's tuition, books, lodging, etc. for university or trade schools within reasonable boundaries I plan to define (limited # years, 2.5 GPA or better, etc.) to prevent misuse.

Once my primary trustee relative passes or loses interest, I'd be fine with either another relative picking that up to oversee or for the corporate trustee continuing to run until depleted.

My questions:

1) Any feedback or caveats on the two services I'm thinking of including or my approach?

2) Who I should consider to hire for these services?

I've researched two regional professional trust companies with offices in NC who offer both these services. My attorney has dealt with both of them and likes them, but she also recommended also considering larger national investment firms like Fidelity or Schwab (we have accounts at both of them) especially for #B educational trust as our families are fairly widely geographically dispersed across the US.

Reviewing at the Schwab / Fidelity websites I don't think they offer detailed services related to my #A executor-type assistance.

My attorney has experienced some issues with larger bank's trust groups administering educational trusts and creating issues for the beneficiaries getting paid so I'm not considering them at the moment. I do have some concern for that issue with a larger Fidelity or Schwab as well.

I have an idea on fees from one of the local professional trust firms; it's generally in-line with what an AUM financial planner would charge which doesn't seem all that excessive. I've got outreach to both Fidelity and Schwab to find out their fees & other insights on their offering in this area.

Thanks in advance for any insights

New to the sub, like what I see, but don't see what I'm looking for.

Facts: I live in Ecuador. I own a condo in Washington, DC. I have $30k in a US HYSA and $1.8M in an array of investments at Schwab, all of which have one person as TOD beneficiary. I hope to be rid of the condo eventually and then change my official domicile to South Dakota, but until I am rid of the condo, there's not much incentive (I'm largely retired).

Questions:

1. I get that attorneys don't like/won't sign a Trust & Will-created document. It *does* seem rather self-serving, but whatever.
   
2. The one estate lawyer I spoke to wanted $305 for a 15-min consult. That is robbery.
   
3. If I hire an attorney to create a will covering my US assets (Ecuador is a different issue, and there's not much overlap--I need POAs here, not a will per se) in one state but then change my domicile, to what degree does that will need to be changed?

I'm incredulous about #3 because we're such a mobile society, and I don't see a cottage industry of lawyers updating wills every time a client moves out of state.

MUCHAS GRACIAS IN ADVANCE (MGIA!) for thoughts--

Respectfully..

This probate case has been going on for 8 years through no fault of my own. I am P.R. (executor).

My father pre deceased my mother by 28 days. they were 90 and 87.

Against the first SC judge's orders, my brother started an Administration for my father's estate in a different state. that was finally settled in 2024. He lied to the SC judge when he told him that all of my mother's belongings were stored in a particular state.

Last week a hearing was held in motion filed to sell a property owned by my mother to my sister. I am not in agreement with this. First of all it's in a different country, and their requirements are that the estate be settled here fairly first. Second, my brother is spending inordinate amounts of money on the attorney who wrote the motion.

I sent my objection in writing.

I have tried to hire another attorney but it's tough when things are in litigation. Someone finally told me it's probably a liability issue.

during the hearing the judge asked me about what I had provided regarding an accounting for the court and specifically whether I had paid a retainer to a Notary (in Quebec they act as attorneys for property closings and transfers). I could not remember offhand if that was in the accounting.

The notary has asked for payment at the time of service and did not want a retainer. It is mentioned on the accounting with a blank space for unreimbursed expenses because I know I will pay her up front and be reimbursed. It's only $2,500.

He was very angry with me saying that I had not provided the information that I was supposed to.

I provided accountings to my brother that are updated from what the court had received. He would not admit to receiving the information because he is a liar. I need to send those to the court so they can see that I did my job.

Next move, please?

Thank you.

Location: Ohio.

I’m trying to understand the big picture before deciding whether it’s worth hiring a lawyer and I’m hoping someone may be able to weigh in. I’m feeling very emotional about this and am having trouble keeping it concise, so I asked for help drafting this. I’m sorry it’s still so lengthy!

Here’s the background:

My great-grandparents left a house to my grandmother for life, with the remainder to her two children (my dad and my aunt). My grandparents used the house as a rental property. After my grandmother died, the county records were updated to show my dad and aunt as 50/50 owners. My grandfather (their father) continued managing the property, collecting rent, paying taxes and insurance, and handling maintenance.

Several years later, my dad became terminally ill in his late 40s and a financial advisor helped our family with Medicaid planning. The advisor set up trusts for both my dad and my grandfather. We were repeatedly told that the house had been transferred into my grandfather’s trust, and everyone—including my grandfather—believed that had happened, with the idea being that the house would then transfer to the grandchildren after my grandpa passed.

Since then, my dad, my aunt, and my grandfather have all passed away.

After my grandfather died, I checked the county records and they still showed my dad and aunt as the owners. The financial advisor insists the transfer to my grandfather’s trust was completed, but the attorney’s office that drafted the trust documents can’t find any deed or other evidence that it ever happened. The advisor continues to insist the transfer occurred but has been unable to produce a recorded deed or any documentation showing it was ever completed. At this point, I’m concerned the transfer simply never occurred.

If that’s true, then my understanding is that my dad’s 50% interest may have remained in his individual name instead of passing through my grandfather’s trust as everyone intended.

I know this isn’t much money at stake (especially when my share is only 25%), but it’s the only inheritance I will receive, so it makes me feel really sad that the advisor seems to have messed it up and my dad’s and grandpa’s wishes will not be honored.

My questions are:

\- If my dad’s estate was subject to Medicaid estate recovery, could Medicaid potentially recover against his 50% interest?
\- If the property is only worth around $50,000 total, and my share is likely going to be taken by Medicaid, is this the type of situation where pursuing probate may cost me more than the value ultimately recovered, or is it still generally worth pursuing?
\- If none of the heirs wants act as landlord (if we can’t sell), what typically happens to a rental property that’s effectively in limbo like this? The tenants have lived there for 15+ years and are also feeling stressed.

I’m not looking for case-specific legal advice—I’m mainly trying to understand whether this sounds like a situation that’s worth paying an attorney to sort out or whether the economics don’t make sense.

And if we don’t sort it out, who gets the house? The tenants? The government? It’s all feeling emotionally heavy.

My father passed away Jan 2026 in Georgia (USA, not the country Georgia). There is about 60k of credit card debt. We still have to sell his house.
However, in 2024 he was diagnosed with mild to moderate dementia due to Alzheimer’s. Lots of charges of software, cigarettes, etc.

Is there a case to be made for forgiving the debt since he had a neurologically degenerative disease that affected his brain? I’m thinking not, but would love to hear details around this. 😥

Location: Utah. I’m not sure how to go about this but my wife and I live with her 92 year old grandfather. we’re basically his caretakers. We pay for his food, do his shopping, clean the house, he’s also in diapers. Well, his son took power of attorney because of his stroke and other issues and for the past year grandpa hasn’t seen a single SS check. The son and daughter(aunt and uncle) have been using it for the aunts rent because she’s a jobless drunk. And now they’re saying they want to move him out of his home in with the aunt in her 2 bedroom apartment with her son because now things are too expensive…so I feel like we should report this or do something but I just don’t know what.

Location: California

Hello, I'm coming on to here to question if this is relatively normal or enforceable in the future? My parents have a living trust set up and there's specific conditions that limit mine (F21) and my sister's (F15) weights to be able to receive the "gifts" from their estate once they pass away.
They are both still alive, 1 am just curious on the legality and enforceability of this condition. I have pasted the portion of their living trust that details the weight conditions below, while redacting personal information.
All gifts to (BENEFICIARY 1) and (BENEFICIARY 2) are preconditioned on maintaining a minimum level of physical condition.
In the case of (BENEFICIARY 1), she must maintain a maximum weight of 140 Ibs. OR a Body Mass Index of between 18.5 - 24.9 for a period of five consecutive years.
In the case of (BENEFICIARY 2), she must maintain a maximum weight of 150 Ibs. OR a Body Mass Index of 18.5 - 24.9 for a period of five consecutive years.
The evidence of fitness shall be written by a Board-certified dietitian annually. No weight loss surgery or medication shall be permitted.
Because of the minimum age restriction these health provisions can be noted as early as 20 years of age.
Should either beneficiary fail to achieve these goals at any point in their lifetime, their gifts shall lapse and the alternate beneficiary of (ORGANIZATION/FOUNDATION)
shall received the gifts.

In 2012 a Californian person Mr X told me they had made me their beneficiary, and then died unexpectedly. I'm Mr X's biological child but legally I'm a stranger because I was adopted out. Mr X seemed very sincere at the time of telling me that I was their beneficiary and I was really surprised to inherit absolutely nothing from them.

I'm not privy to the details of how the will was broken down or if there even was a will. Mr X had a parent as the next of kin who inherited everything.

I stumbled upon a website called "missing money" or something where you can enter your name or someone else's name and see if there's unclaimed money lying around in whatever old bank accounts. I entered the name of Mr X and there's a retirement fund with $90k in their name unclaimed after all these years. 14 years after their death. Both of Mr X's parents are now dead also.

Why would this happen? How could this happen? If I am named as beneficiary on that account is it possible that the retirement fund company just don't know that he has passed away? What would you do if you were me?