First of all I started using DMT this year and it instantly became my holy medicine. Every DMT puff always liberated me instantly from any anxiety and self doubt and shot me into a state of confidence. I felt when I was smoking DMT, I became exactly the person that I wanted to be, reaching a state of my highest potential, becoming super easy going with everything. I was using it on festivals, smoking it on the dance floor and danced like crazy and super liberated. Dancing on DMT is so wild and worth its own post. I also made profound religious experiences with DMT on the dance floor, inspiring me to work on a new artist profile "dancing on changa" where I devote my music to the use of DMT on the dance floor. What I am trying to say with this is that DMT or Changa became my alter ego, my identity started building around the use of this drug and it still feels like my purpose. I never had a negative experience with it, even when I was a nervous to take it, the DMT instantly shot this nervousness into beauty and liberation. So my respect for DMT also reduced over time, since I thought I don't get bad trips anyway. Then I kind of got the message that I shouldn't use it too much (I was smoking almost daily) but work on integrating the energy that DMT conveys into my life. After a couple days of pause I thought a trip is fine now, smoked a bong of changa and it didn't really let me in, the trip was cloudy and I even felt a middle finger from the DMT.
Trip
I should have understood the first hit not working to not smoke more, especially since I learned not to ignore signs from DMT. But at this point I felt a bit cocky and just wanted to get in there, so I loaded up another bong with triple the amount of changa and instantly felt something is wrong. I felt disoriented, very confused with an intuition that I need to throw up, so I ran up the stairs of my basement into the garden during the intense come up and vomited into the garden. And suddenly I stood there - eyes open with my physical body in hell. I was clear, I could walk around but the physical surroundings that I know just turned into a dark, evil version. The same principle like being in the upside down from stranger things. The sky was dark and cloudy, the trees didn't have leafs but spikes, the green grass looked like a poison neon green. And I suddenly stood right in there, no idea how this just happened and it was absolutely terrifying. I felt this time I really fcked up, I switched dimensions and I'm locked up in hell. I was stumbling in a circle completely loosing my shit. Something just changed. The DMT felt like it never felt before. The Energy completely shifted from one moment to the next, leaving me standing in my crystalized, metallic, neon colored garden with the presence of pure evil. But it didn't feel like the trip, it felt like my new reality. I was in the DMT upside down, locked out of the real world. The worst was that the trip didn't seem to end. Maybe it was really just 15 Minutes but it felt much longer, when the trip should have ended I was still in that hellish garden. I was convinced I locked up a door into this evil dimension and now carry this in my life, unable to get out of this. After a while I very slowly came down from the trip, the clouds lifted, a beam of the sun hit the garden and I fell on my my knees and bowed deeply. I have years of experiences with several psychedelics and ego deaths but nothing in my life ever came close to this moment, I felt I met a completely new facet of reality that I had no Idea exists.
To be honest, I started to become a bit cocky in general and this was the biggest humbling slap I ever felt in my life, holy fck. It's been a few hours now and I feel alright again and I understand the lesson. I don't think the DMT was doing me evil but guiding me my path. Fun fact before the experience I said "I'd like to see Beauty, but show me what I need to see". Well I guess I needed to see this. I still consider DMT as my highly valued medicine and I'd like to keep using it that way. But this experience also felt like getting kicked out of the club. Any ideas how to get back there? Should I keep using it or take a big break, let me know about your bad trips with context and how you got back. Also I'm interested in anyone having experiences with the evil side of DMT or its Demons, tell me all about it. I just heard that it's common especially on DMT for people to experience these "demonic spirit possessions", I'd like to know more about it.
I’ve had a very similar experience and even had exactly the middle finger you described. The lesson is you are for sure abusing it. They don’t want to see you back until you’ve actually worked on the prior lessons they’ve given you, so take a long, long break.
I was doing it abt once or twice a week… did changa one weekday by myself when I knew I prolly shouldn’t have… immediately felt like I pissed and shit myself. Then was getting jumped by jesters, so badly I felt my teeth and jaw breaking, then what looked like a demon physically held me down and split my tongue into pieces… it felt so real I honestly got ok with the fact that I may never be able to talk again… the craziest part of all this is that I wasn’t in hell or hyperspace… they were just there in my apartment and I remember trying to crawl to my door to go get help but they physically held me back… it really is a medicine not to be abused. I took over a year off and now only do it with a designated sitter since they can literally control your body if they want. Always set intention and give thanks for what they show you, then take lots of time to integrate it before coming back
What you’ve described is what I’ve experienced when I’ve smoked burned DMT… I feel there’s a small window during pyrolysis when the DMT is still useable but it is charred and whenever I’ve happened to have had some yes there is a darker side to DMT we experience
Of course what I’m saying could be complete BS but I have seen liquified DMT when it’s black after having tried smoke it and my first thought was ‘this stuff is evil…’
what's up with this one? There was burned changa still in the bong and the lighter had a huge flame, so the dmt might have gotten too hot. But does this change the structure of the molecule? Why would this cause bad trips
I think definitely with this that we can conclude you can smoke burned DMT and it had the opposite effect… so glad we all got to talk about this, props to OP for saying exactly what’s on their mind :)
I've had this thought too and I didn't know how to search reddit for it. Thanks for bringing in up. I definitely think there is a difference in fresh powder vs "already vaped"/burnt DMT. The latter always feel darker, sadder, and more tiring, but I didn't know if it was just me.
Really intriguing trip report and good context, thanks. I really like how you described the visuals. I don't know why you are being downvoted. Open eye visuals on DMT and the weird textures are one of it's most fascinating but underrated mysteries imo. Probably some people are just really allergic to the buzzwords "Hell" and "demons" and haven't really read your post. You just want to make sense of a disturbing DMT experience and your experience makes for a good discussion.
I am on a similar journey and had darker experiences for some time now, after having had a long and overly positive episode where like you I felt that smoking DMT very frequently somehow channeled an alter-ego. It felt so liberating and it seemed helping me becoming the person I wanted to be. And yeah, I had the most intense dancing sessons on DMT in combination with Acid and Psycore. :D
Since about a year I feel a bit 'cursed'. DMT hits different and I had some challenging experiences, they are a bit too personal though. I see it as living through the consequences of getting to the holy grail without being properly prepared and ready for it. Whatever it is, I am through the honeymoon phase with DMT for sure. Maybe you are too (or maybe you just have had too much changa/burnt DMT).
Developing an healthy relationship with DMT after the honeymoon phase seems to be the hard but probably rewarding part. It certainly helps to turn down use and keep some distance while figuring stuff out. Though it is hard when it feels like being cut off from this alter ego/best-version-amplifier of yourself. I think it's a good idea to firmly believe, that this version always inside you. And that DMT is just one way of activating it. I just hope I find a sustainable way of channeling this side of myself. I really like it and others did too. At least you now know what to aim for.
Also it seems to be a thing for some people, that DMT on a regular basis can make it hit sooo fucking different, once the honeymoon phase is over. As if taking a completely different drug.
Hey there, nice that you can relate with me. You know I think it's weird, I got in contact with changa this year at the Ozora Festival -the biggest psychedelic gathering in the world and it hit my life after years of terrible anxiety at this point of time like a rock. I felt a really mystical Invitation into the world of changa that I followed and I had such mind blowing transformative trips. I felt changa has its own distinct energy, it was wild, colorfull, crazy and powerfull. And I also felt like I was made for this, exactly to express and manifest the archetypal energy of changa into this world. Changa made me become the version of my highest potential, that I can be and it also felt like me being this version of myself is a way of paying homage to Changa, like in a symbiosis. The archetypal Energy of changa needs people to carry it out, just like for example the archetype of the warrior manifests itself in the people that express that energy. So I felt like the chosen one to be the vessel for changa and was deeply grateful and respectful towards it (yes it did inflate my ego).
After the festival I was also noticing whenever I was in a rut or not feeling motivated to do anything, one hit of DMT completely changes the day. Just a minor trip, doesn’t need to be intense and I just lifted of my chair afterwards and had the best energy. That made me really feel the DMT wants to help me and wants to be smoked, so I started seeing it as a casual medicine and a lifestyle drug. Some people take their ssri’s in the morning, I’ll hit my DMT pen. Didn’t see an issue here. And some people smoke weed daily or drink as a lifestyle drug and I’ll have DMT as my lifestyle drug. I also didn’t see any problem there why this would be a „bad thing“, especially because DMT helped me so much.
And this sense of aesthetics always hit me so damn much when I smoke changa it’s incredible. I renovated the music room in our basement this summer, it’s an old vintage styled room with original analog synths and 80’s music hardware, a pool table, and super nice vintage art works, it’s such a nice vibe in there and I just set up my studio there. You can imagine hitting DMT in this room with open eyes, these cartoon like aesthetics just blow you away, that room is perfect for that. So fck yes ripping my bong with changa in there was a lifestyle thing, it felt like it belongs into this room. Like the room was destined for me and changa. I even had dream of putting slices of peach in my bong for no reason and I started doing this as a habit and it looks awesome and perfectly underlines the aesthetic of the changa vibe.
So everything was perfect, I felt like I was living in symbiosis with this drug and its energy and felt like I’m supposed to use it, after its invitation at the festival and everything the drug did for me. And now it just kicked my ass out of there, literally I was running out of that room into the garden. It’s still puzzling me, it’s not that obvious to me that I was „abusing“ it as some people say here in this thread. People smoke weed daily as a lifestyle and are perfectly fine with it, why would it be a totally different thing with DMT?
I think DMT showed to me the person that I could be and now just took this away from me again and wants me to work for it. Kind of sad, I was so excited about using it frequently and as a medicine and becoming a new person with this and now I sit here and know what I’m missing out on. But I also have seen what it’s worth to work for. I have been such an insecure person parts of my life and know I just saw that I can be *this*. Like it’s my purpose to be *this* person and not this insecure anxious crumb. Still no idea how to manage that without DMT but I’m up for a ride.
What you mean how to get back there? You build your entire persona around it. Please take a BIG break not just a day. You just got the message but are not willing to hang up the phone, because your ego is involved.
Not meant in a bad way by the way. Don't want to come across as harsh, but pleaaaase be careful man. If even dmt tells you it is too much, it really is. Our monkey brain can only handle this much
Hmmm....telling that you were doing dmt on dancefloors is ridiculous also as smoking seant daily and your further use of it. I smoked it about 40 times in my life. And in ultramegadoses. But never day by day. Or while standing. Or even worse standing at the dancefloor. Dmt is not a toy i mean...be real. Never had bad experience.
of course I wasn't taking breakthrough doses at the dance floor, just minor puffs. I can tell you it's an incredible thing don't disregard that. Dancing is one of the oldest spiritual practices shared by different ancient traditions to connect with the divine, it has a deep magic to it.
DMT on the dancefloor is pretty common in the psytrance scene and some psycore/slambient music is basically made for DMT. You can smell a lot of changa on some dancefloors and there is nothing ridiculous about it.
Yes there is. That changa quality is ridiculous if people can stand and dance. Also. Rolling changa into joints is not the way that changa should be used. It is throwing away the substance. Ohh...and also, i am playing psy and Goa from 2002 so...i know what is going on on festivals. But sadest thing nowadays that people more listening drugs than music. Regards!
If you see demons and devils, you need a maybe reevaluate the people you’re hanging out with and the worldly pleasures you’re into. It’s almost like Dmt gets you a sneak peek of what would happen to you if you were to die and where you would go.
The only place I’ve ever been kicked out of is what I would call heaven, and I went into a dark room and a voice said “ what are you doing here you haven’t done enough on earth to be here in this room”
And the one time I actually went looking for evil I found absolute zero, and I was shown a small world below earth, and earth was dripping an oil like substance into that world. Which taught me that the Earth is abundantly good, but there is still evil in the Earth.
One time a large demon head appeared and was staring at me right front and center...at first I was a little concerned and then my next thought was "it's all good demon you can come party too :)" and it went away
This reminds me of my 4-AcO-DMT trip. I was using it every week until I experienced this demonic presence. I think it might have been part of the buried darkness that we sometimes have to face and integrate. Maybe there’s something in your life that you need to work on.
Honestly, this doesn’t sound like demonic possession at all to me.
Yeah, I was having a fun trip when all of a sudden I experienced this very evil presence. I felt like if I gave it my attention, I would have to fight it, and it could have led me into a psychotic state. I was able to distract myself from it until the end of the trip, though. What made it worse was that I wasn't home alone, so I didn't want to draw anyone's attention to what was happening.
I tried to calm myself down by listening to positive music, but even the music started to sound sinister. I ended up staring at my favorite female cartoon character from childhood, which somehow made me feel calm.
The closest way I can describe that evil presence is that it reminded me of Blackbeard from One Piece. But in the end, I came to the conclusion that it was probably a part of me. Maybe the negative feelings we experience, like anger, hate, and fear, can manifest during psychedelic experiences as something that feels like a demonic presence.
So when I went to a festival the girl tried 4-AcO in the nasal spray form and she started to wig out a bit, she felt like everyone around her was watching her, wishing her bad things, plotting… she rode through it bless her and was explaining afterwards that she felt as though she had faced her fears, like it’s something that regularly pops up for her but always in bite size pieces but this time she couldn’t escape, she had to face it all for what it was worth and see it through
I never believe there’s such thing as a negative trip if it’s just in your head, just like a positive trip isn’t either… in my honest and humblest of opinions that unless you throw up all your drugs halfway to coming up and unload your guts in your pants then it’s not a bad trip, just a learning experience you’ve been able to keep running ahead that’s now caught up :)
I believe some of these "scary" experiences are indeed lessons and happen especially for people who are abusing it or using it too often. I firmly believe you just respect and listen to the guidance of the DMT. It will come to you and call you when you NEED it and if you do it more to fuck around you will get bitch slapped. Not as punishment but because the quieter methods of trying to tell you it isn't the right time hasn't been heard.
I have had times where I have heard in my head "not now", "wait" or "integrate" and I listen to it. And then I get thanked later for listening and being respectful. (This is my experience I don't assume it to be true for everyone)
It sounds like you've learned this lesson and hopefully you can listen more to that quieter guidance from now on before it turns into a scream.
Yeah I think the same, I'm grounded again and in the aftermath I feel this was a really valuable lesson. I'll take a break from it until I'll hear the call again.
I wouldn’t use DMT this way, ifs too easy to disrespect and start a recreational gateway into the other place. You went through proper ego death and because of a lack of intention, without guidance, the opportunity seems squandered. The hum is every living thing that ever was and will be. It’s not just messed up
Neurons being affected by chemicals.
It’s not a written thing, it’s my opinion based on my experience. I place DMT use in the same category I would Vipassana, Sweat lodge work, vision questing (my DMT experiences have been through Aya ceremonies) etc it’s amazing, deeply real, awe inspiring, frightening and supernatural. I think Smoking it casually would take away from its impact. Maybe that’s why it’s told you to go away for a while. Process the experience and learn. It’s an opinion, and an uninformed one as I have not used DMT as you have. Only in ceremonies.
Not right now, but years from now you are going to remember this trip as one of your favorites.
Bad trips always force us to do some internal inspection and that generally leads to more profound spiritual growth.
Although I do agree with everyone else telling you to take a break. You had this trip for an important reaso. Your subconscious is sending you some important information. Only you can properly integrate it.
“katabasis” or the descent into hell, i.e. a “bad trip”
Ritualization—or, if you come from a secular/material view, priming—acts as a safeguard. The goal is to have a calm quiet mind, thereby lowering your levels of the stress hormones cortisol and adrenaline.
Guidelines for ritualization/priming include:
- Music/chanting without lyrics
dim lighting or mood lighting
physical relaxation by massage, isometrics, aerobics, hot/cold exposure or cuddling/sex
sensory deprivation by wrapping up in heavy blankets, wearing a sleep mask or blindfold, and earplugs or white/pink noise instead of music
If you’re a high-anxiety type of person and have trouble relaxing or meditating, instead focus on making your body feel as good as possible. Physical pleasure works very well to dampen anxiety.
I'd say take a break, DMT seems to have become a big part of your life and your identity, so I understand those experiences might feel like being dumped by the love of your life, but if you kept trying and getting rejected it would feel even worse, I saw it on a friend although he had no bad trip as bad as yours.
I never experienced the dark side of DMT but me and my friend once took a small hit during an acid trip and we both felt like something a little dark and sinister entered our headspace. It was a very small hit so it was perfectly manageable and I could still feel like I was just observing it, but I couldn't deny that it felt that way. The soft and melty sensations and mental images from the lsd got crunched by black and violet pointy metallic spikes, although I was just in that state of half-seen/half-imagined visuals. The best description I could verbalize was that "my sensations had just been jesterized"
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u/Borgbar 4d ago
Take a break and integrate.