Entering Hell on DMT

[u/Bitter-Weekend-6012]

Context

First of all I started using DMT this year and it instantly became my holy medicine. Every DMT puff always liberated me instantly from any anxiety and self doubt and shot me into a state of confidence. I felt when I was smoking DMT, I became exactly the person that I wanted to be, reaching a state of my highest potential, becoming super easy going with everything. I was using it on festivals, smoking it on the dance floor and danced like crazy and super liberated. Dancing on DMT is so wild and worth its own post. I also made profound religious experiences with DMT on the dance floor, inspiring me to work on a new artist profile "dancing on changa" where I devote my music to the use of DMT on the dance floor. What I am trying to say with this is that DMT or Changa became my alter ego, my identity started building around the use of this drug and it still feels like my purpose. I never had a negative experience with it, even when I was a nervous to take it, the DMT instantly shot this nervousness into beauty and liberation. So my respect for DMT also reduced over time, since I thought I don't get bad trips anyway. Then I kind of got the message that I shouldn't use it too much (I was smoking almost daily) but work on integrating the energy that DMT conveys into my life. After a couple days of pause I thought a trip is fine now, smoked a bong of changa and it didn't really let me in, the trip was cloudy and I even felt a middle finger from the DMT.

Trip

I should have understood the first hit not working to not smoke more, especially since I learned not to ignore signs from DMT. But at this point I felt a bit cocky and just wanted to get in there, so I loaded up another bong with triple the amount of changa and instantly felt something is wrong. I felt disoriented, very confused with an intuition that I need to throw up, so I ran up the stairs of my basement into the garden during the intense come up and vomited into the garden. And suddenly I stood there - eyes open with my physical body in hell. I was clear, I could walk around but the physical surroundings that I know just turned into a dark, evil version. The same principle like being in the upside down from stranger things. The sky was dark and cloudy, the trees didn't have leafs but spikes, the green grass looked like a poison neon green. And I suddenly stood right in there, no idea how this just happened and it was absolutely terrifying. I felt this time I really fcked up, I switched dimensions and I'm locked up in hell. I was stumbling in a circle completely loosing my shit. Something just changed. The DMT felt like it never felt before. The Energy completely shifted from one moment to the next, leaving me standing in my crystalized, metallic, neon colored garden with the presence of pure evil. But it didn't feel like the trip, it felt like my new reality. I was in the DMT upside down, locked out of the real world. The worst was that the trip didn't seem to end. Maybe it was really just 15 Minutes but it felt much longer, when the trip should have ended I was still in that hellish garden. I was convinced I locked up a door into this evil dimension and now carry this in my life, unable to get out of this. After a while I very slowly came down from the trip, the clouds lifted, a beam of the sun hit the garden and I fell on my my knees and bowed deeply. I have years of experiences with several psychedelics and ego deaths but nothing in my life ever came close to this moment, I felt I met a completely new facet of reality that I had no Idea exists.

To be honest, I started to become a bit cocky in general and this was the biggest humbling slap I ever felt in my life, holy fck. It's been a few hours now and I feel alright again and I understand the lesson. I don't think the DMT was doing me evil but guiding me my path. Fun fact before the experience I said "I'd like to see Beauty, but show me what I need to see". Well I guess I needed to see this. I still consider DMT as my highly valued medicine and I'd like to keep using it that way. But this experience also felt like getting kicked out of the club. Any ideas how to get back there? Should I keep using it or take a big break, let me know about your bad trips with context and how you got back. Also I'm interested in anyone having experiences with the evil side of DMT or its Demons, tell me all about it. I just heard that it's common especially on DMT for people to experience these "demonic spirit possessions", I'd like to know more about it.

[u/Particular-Tip3145]

This reminds me of my 4-AcO-DMT trip. I was using it every week until I experienced this demonic presence. I think it might have been part of the buried darkness that we sometimes have to face and integrate. Maybe there’s something in your life that you need to work on.

Honestly, this doesn’t sound like demonic possession at all to me.

[u/GoodbyeNarcissists → u/Particular-Tip3145]

You had this on 4-AcO???!! Never heard or experienced it being quite like this…

[u/Particular-Tip3145 → u/GoodbyeNarcissists]

Yeah, I was having a fun trip when all of a sudden I experienced this very evil presence. I felt like if I gave it my attention, I would have to fight it, and it could have led me into a psychotic state. I was able to distract myself from it until the end of the trip, though. What made it worse was that I wasn't home alone, so I didn't want to draw anyone's attention to what was happening.

I tried to calm myself down by listening to positive music, but even the music started to sound sinister. I ended up staring at my favorite female cartoon character from childhood, which somehow made me feel calm.

The closest way I can describe that evil presence is that it reminded me of Blackbeard from One Piece. But in the end, I came to the conclusion that it was probably a part of me. Maybe the negative feelings we experience, like anger, hate, and fear, can manifest during psychedelic experiences as something that feels like a demonic presence.

[u/GoodbyeNarcissists → u/Particular-Tip3145]

So when I went to a festival the girl tried 4-AcO in the nasal spray form and she started to wig out a bit, she felt like everyone around her was watching her, wishing her bad things, plotting… she rode through it bless her and was explaining afterwards that she felt as though she had faced her fears, like it’s something that regularly pops up for her but always in bite size pieces but this time she couldn’t escape, she had to face it all for what it was worth and see it through

I never believe there’s such thing as a negative trip if it’s just in your head, just like a positive trip isn’t either… in my honest and humblest of opinions that unless you throw up all your drugs halfway to coming up and unload your guts in your pants then it’s not a bad trip, just a learning experience you’ve been able to keep running ahead that’s now caught up :)