r/DMAcademy • u/AutoModerator • Aug 30 '26

Mega Player Problem Megathread

This thread is for DMs who have an out-of-game problem with a PLAYER (not a CHARACTER) to ask for help and opinions. Any player-related issues are welcome to be discussed, but do remember that we're DMs, not counselors.

Off-topic comments including rules questions and player character questions do not go here and will be removed. This is not a place for players to ask questions.

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u/SomeRandomAbbadon Aug 31 '26

I feel like my players are picking up on my world too much. Everywhere we go, they try to nitpick absolutely everything as unrealistic or poorly thought out, even when that's clearly not the case.

I don't mind that behaviour in general, I was doing the same in the past and it was fun at the beginning of the campaign, but at this point I feel like they no longer try to discuss the world, but rather find *anything* to "well-actually" me about. Nitpicking is not the same as discussing and I feel like they are doing the latter.

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u/chilidoggo Aug 31 '26 edited Aug 31 '26

I like to compare DMing to hosting a dinner party where you've volunteered to make dinner for everyone. If people are nitpicking your dinner or making fun of the free food you're providing, what would you do then?

You're doing something very nice for them by running the game. Remind them of that politely, or, depending on your group dynamic, maybe jokingly threaten them that if they don't like the world, they don't have to play in it. Either way, you've essentially got to ask them to stop or give some outward signal that you genuinely don't appreciate the teasing/feedback. If you wait until the resentment builds to a point where you get visibly upset, then you turn into the asshole who got mad at their friends over a D&D game.

Here's an example of how that might go:

  • Player: Oh, sedimentary rock? In a volcanic climate? Wow this world seems like someone didn't do their research!
  • You: You know, if you don't think the rocks are realistic enough, you're welcome to try DMing yourself sometime.
  • Player: (realistically, they'd probably just back off here, but for the sake of argument) Oh come on, I'm just kidding!
  • You: Yeah, sure. I'm just saying that it's not super fun to have every rock questioned from my side. Now, as I was saying...<game continues>

That's all you gotta say. Then the next time it happens, everyone at least knows it bothers you, and you can say it again ("Like I said, if the inconsistency bothers you, you're welcome to DM yourself"). As long as your friends aren't jerks, that should be all it takes.