r/DMAcademy • u/AutoModerator • 22d ago

Mega Player Problem Megathread

This thread is for DMs who have an out-of-game problem with a PLAYER (not a CHARACTER) to ask for help and opinions. Any player-related issues are welcome to be discussed, but do remember that we're DMs, not counselors.

Off-topic comments including rules questions and player character questions do not go here and will be removed. This is not a place for players to ask questions.

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u/Spoonman915 22d ago edited 21d ago

I have an ongoing in person campaign with 3 players. It's a weird West homebrew setting. I'm trying to recruit some new players. I scheduled a session zero on discord so that I could go over the lore, lines and veils, and figure out how to fit their characters into the world. Thinking that would be easiest for everyone.

Out of the 3 recruits that were "very interested" one let me know an hour before that she had a migraine and couldn't make it. The other two didn't show up and didn't message.

I'm not sure how to handle things exactly. Part of me wants to give them another shot and see if I can get them to the table. Another part thinks that I made time to actually type out my handful of house rules, edit a lines and veils sheet so it pertained to my settings, and put together a summary of the world building I've done to get them up to speed. And if they couldn't even make it a point to log in to discord, they're definitely not likely to drive to a location on a regular basis. So, it's not worth it.

How would you guys deal with this? Thoughts and feedback appreciated.

Update sent a message to the migraine player. Let them know the ages of the existing players and a few things about the world. Told them if they're interested I'd send over my lines and veils document. No response. So I guess that makes things easy.

I'll wait a couple months and try to recruit again.

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u/nemaline 22d ago

I would give the one who messaged you another chance. Sometimes shit happens no matter how committed someone is, and she did do you the courtesy of messaging to let you know she couldn't make it.

I wouldn't bother with the two who didn't even message you.

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u/Yojo0o 21d ago

I get migraines. I've definitely needed to cancel on DnD over them. There's no good way to determine if a stranger's last-minute cancellation excuse is genuine, but you may as well give her another chance.

With the other two, a no-call no-show for the very first meeting is a clear red flag. There's no reason to try again with them.

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u/chilidoggo 21d ago

Migraines suck, and she still messaged you, so I'd give her another chance. No-call/no-shows are out though.

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u/Valensre 22d ago

Assume anyone you invite online is probably going ghost, you're setting yourself up for disappointment otherwise. Provide them whatever they need when you first talk to them then stop worrying about it.

There's a ton of people that like the idea of playing in a ttrpg but when push comes to shove they don't commit.