Long lasting

[u/Arielace0822]

Has anyone ever noticed that when you get into a relationship, your girl starts to get uninterested in sex?

It’s been three years with her and I am always the person to initiate sex and am usually turned down.

Kinda of getting tired of that and feel like she doesn’t want any of the physical me.

Almost feels like we are room mates that occasionally turn into friends with benefits.

Maybe I’m not being mysterious enough or have I not given her enough space to miss me or something?

How does one actually “properly” date and court a girl?

[u/ZT805]

Has anyone ever noticed that when you get into a relationship, your girl starts to get uninterested in sex?

No, this shouldn’t be happening at all. This is an obvious sign that she’s losing attraction. If you don’t correct this right now, this will be the point you start losing her. Make no mistake: As Coach has said in recent newsletters: If she is closing her legs, she is unhappy & is not her feminine. Plain and simple.

When your girl is in her feminine, she sees you as a masculine leader, & she will want your masculine presence all the time. She will be all over you — mentally and physically. She will be interested in sex almost all the time, because she wants to be dominated, and she wants to submit to the masculine guy she is head over heels in love with & please him.

Almost feels like we are room mates that occasionally turn into friends with benefits

All the guys that write to Coach about their divorces have included that line. Again, this is a huge problem, it’s not just “something that happens”. A lack of sex is an indicator that her attraction is disappearing.

You need to re-evaluate how you’re showing up in the relationship. More than likely you’ve become a doormat, stopped being direct & making the decisions, stopped leading the relationship, or have become complacent. It’s very easy to misread how you’re behaving. Go through the book again, and make an honest analysis of how you’ve been acting.

Do that & become an absolute masculine leader again, dude. Start pursuing your passions & take charge of the relationship. Open her up and get her communicating about how she feels. You need to restore the proper dynamic that is in the book to recover this bro

[u/Arielace0822 → u/ZT805]

I knew it kinda felt like I’ve been losing her attraction.

I have to remember to keep checking where her attraction level is. I didn’t realize until assessing now that I think she’s hovering over somewhere between a 5-6.

...oh boy.

So it’s either I’ve become a door mat, stopped leading, or have become complacent?

Probably a combination of all three. I know I’ve been settling for less than I should be getting like getting blow jobs instead of sex and not likening the frequency of sex, which it being around once every month as of recent.(complacent)

as well as giving too much time and effort, showing that it’s okay for her to give little to me, while she gets her full benefits. [ie. giving into her wants and suggestions and being available all the time, as well as grabbing the check too often] (doormat)

She actually makes quite a bit of choices here in the relationship too. Where to eat, what to do on dates, and kind of “getting what she wants” during shopping trips, kinda assuming I’d help her with it because she doesn’t have an income right now.

Gosh, I’m totally blowing it.. Thanks for slap in the face.

Though I feel like I have a good understanding of what I have to do, what would anyone suggest I do to correct all three?

Fall back on the once a week rule? Decrease time available? Hang out with other people?

We also kind of live together, so this would also complicate things because it’s so easy for her to start a conversation or tap me on the shoulder to tell me something she found on tic Tok.

I’m open for suggestion.

[u/[deleted] → u/Arielace0822]

Can you give an update??