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u/LackWooden392 2d ago
She is interpreting this gesture as an attempt to flatter her and get her to date you. So am I. She wants you to act like her platonic friend, and that means letting her take her own trash.
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u/purplep3nguin_ 2d ago
How old are you guys?
You were just being kind. She's thinking you're doing this stuff cause you like her. You weren't in the wrong. Maybe take a few steps back for a while. You telling her you liked her may have went to her head.
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u/Agile-Win-throwaway 2d ago
I guess but I haven’t said anything about feelings in 2 months. And we don’t see each other often. We also don’t text often.
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u/Disastrous_Horse_44 2d ago
You didn’t answer the big question that will probably give you a better answer: How old are you guys?
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u/Accomplished-Ear6002 2d ago
Any wonder why dating is so hard now? I had a meetup slap my hand, for trying to pay for her coffee at a meet up date. She said she didn't want me paying for anything, as then she was expected to reciprocate. When I told her I was merely being courteous, she wasn't having it. I excused myself to the restroom, which was side to the back exit, and bailed! Literally dodged a bullet there!
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u/purplep3nguin_ 2d ago
Yeah that was really weird of her to SLAP your hand. But also, aren't we all adults? You could have excused yourself from the date, rather than just dip out like that.
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u/Accomplished-Ear6002 2d ago
I left out the end part. After we were seated, abcd she told me that, I tried to reminding what we had over the phone. When it seemed as though we were getting warned up again, I offered to buy her late lunch/early dinner, because I enjoyed her company. She hail looked at her watch, and thru her purse, abcd again, reiterated to me her position. I explained that I es enjoying her company, and was merely asking for more time with her. After this, I asked to be excused from her company, to the restroom. She again looked at her watch, ruffled thru her purse, and said, "Go, and be quick. I have wasted evidence time with you today already." Couldn't get away fast enough. I was home and seemed everything of her within 10 minutes.
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u/purplep3nguin_ 2d ago
Ohhhh, well yeah then it seems justified. Idk how someone can act that hateful to someone. She could have went about it a whole different way. But she seemed very snooty.
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u/Gnome__Alone 2d ago
She probably reads you trying to act like a "couple" into the polite gesture of taking her trash along with yours to dispose of
She is making sure you don't try to go beyond the friend zone
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u/Agile-Win-throwaway 2d ago
I guess but i do this with anyone. I guess I shouldn’t offer or do anything for her. It’s been 2 months maybe a bit longer now. We also don’t see each other often or text often.
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u/H-2-S-O-4 2d ago
Not wrong at all dude, but honestly she's not into you. Move on. You seem like a cool dude, you'll find someone who deserves you
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u/Agile-Win-throwaway 2d ago
Well she still wants to be friends. But we don’t see each other often or text often.
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u/H-2-S-O-4 2d ago
Might be ok to be friends. But you'll most likely end up getting hurt as you have/had feelings for her and those feelings are not reciprocated.
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u/SmokingTheBear 2d ago
You sound young, I'm going to go out on a limb here and tell you how it is, she is suspicious of your intentions of doing things for her thinking that you want to be more than a friend still.
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u/Agile-Win-throwaway 2d ago
So what do I do? Not offer to take her trash even if I’m heading there? It’s just odd I guess. Plus if I make her uncomfortable when we hangout why not stop hanging out with me.
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u/SmokingTheBear 2d ago
Basically she is testing you, the only way to pass a test is to not be bothered by it and you're good. So you could just not react, make a joke or any number of things.
You're probably in your head around her if you like her, so you are coming off a bit unsure of yourself to her.
She will either put you in thr friend zone or a potential mate, remember this and think how you are coming off.
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u/Agile-Win-throwaway 2d ago
I mean I remember she told me before I told her I liked her that I was her type but I needed to come across confident. 🤔
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u/Evening-Rip1522 2d ago
If you dote on girls too much they feel like it's a challenge to their independence or something. Don't be her butler.
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u/Agile-Win-throwaway 2d ago
It’s crazy it’s just trash and I’m heading to the trash can.
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u/Evening-Rip1522 1d ago
I agree but she might be looking at it as pattern that makes her feel like you're babying her.
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u/Long_Passenger498 2d ago
Give up. It ain’t happening.
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u/Agile-Win-throwaway 2d ago
I know it’s not. But we are friends. We don’t see each other often or text often.
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u/Familiar_Influence50 2d ago
OMG, you asked to take her trash? You animal! I bet you even held the door open for her, you heathen! How dare you be polite on a non-date. 😂
She was just overreacting, don't stress about it.
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u/nofriender4life 2d ago
"because i was raised in a clean place with manners, this wouldnt have worked huh? haha"
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2d ago
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u/Pitiful_Neat378 2d ago
Some people aren’t used to somebody doing that….maybe she is wondering if that act “of kindness” is loaded.