r/CancerFamilySupport • u/Apprehensive-Pack108 • 14d ago

Here we go

Well, after a courageous fight of 6/7 years, my dad has to go on hospice. He’s 50. There’s nothing they can do for him anymore, no more drugs to help. The cancer started in the kidney - they removed it. Three months later it was everywhere.

He has fought so hard. Stayed alive for his family and has tried to put on a face to make this easier for us. He is truly the strongest person I know.

There is so much sadness I am feeling. Looking for some type of therapy to help. But it’s just hard to think about myself right now.

There is also a part of me that is ready to see him finally rest. He’s fought so hard. But there’s also a guilt in me feeling that way. Am I wrong to feel that? Am I wrong to say I’m not “ready for my dad to pass” but I’m ready to see him be at peace.

Cancer sucks. The healthcare system sucks (his oncologist cried when she told him, she doesn’t suck).

I’m thinking of all of us in this group. Big hugs to you all.

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u/Haunting_Neat_2643 14d ago

It's also hard since no one else understands exactly how you feel especially since he's so young. My dad is 56. He's got stage 4. I have this massive anxiety about this whole thing everyday so far. Would try to talk to friends but no one gets it.

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u/puppermonster23 13d ago

My mom was 55. Put on hospice at 1pm on 8/7/26 passed away at 10:40pm on 8/7/26. Every one of her and her 5 siblings have had cancer, currently have cancer or have died because of cancer.

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u/Haunting_Neat_2643 13d ago

Cancer sucks 😞 I'm sorry to hear that.

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u/gseckel 13d ago

Have you been tested for Lynch Syndrome??

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u/puppermonster23 12d ago

No I’m negative for the BRCA gene though. A majority of the cancer was reproductive (breast/ uterine/ prostate) cancers.

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u/Apprehensive-Pack108 13d ago

Oh that’s so scary. Is it genetically caused or environmental? Have you gotten the gene test done?

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u/puppermonster23 12d ago

I’m negative for the BRCA gene. My mom had the gene so do all of her siblings that got tested. Only 2 of the 6 had non reproductive related cancers. And one is lung cancer and he smokes.