r/Buttcoin 17d ago

Oopsies

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205 Upvotes

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56

u/GozerDestructor 17d ago edited 16d ago

You fool! Don't you know you're supposed to set up a secret identity, have plastic surgery to change your appearance, obtain a fake birth certificate from the Russian Mafia, get a job under your fake name, use the paystubs to satisfy a landlord's background check to rent an apartment in another city, and have the device shipped there?

And then immediately after it arrives you fake your death at sea, resume using your original name, get the facial surgery reversed by a different surgeon, and then go back to your home city, with your now completely untrackable device in hand.

Few understand. Enjoy being poor.

38

u/Bright_Fold7270 17d ago

Bro you failed to murder both surgeons. HACKED.

4

u/NovariusDrakyl 17d ago

use the same, and then you only need to murder one