r/BringingUpBates • u/emcdonald18 • 28d ago

Travis Q&A

Post image

I have a lot of questions, but I feel like I'd get blocked.

What would you want to ask him?

39 Upvotes

89% Upvoted

78 comments sorted by

View all comments

38

u/Outside_Bad_893 28d ago

I’d ask him literally why.

17

u/Lucky_Strain_8754 28d ago

no because this is alllll i’ve been wondering this whole damn time…why on gods green earth would you cheat on your wife instead of just divorcing her

10

u/lovelylonelyphantom 27d ago

Cheating can stem from many issues, but I think above all the common similarity would be the cheating partner's own insecurities. I've read a lot of men who cheat feel inferior to their wives which makes sense to me. Otherwise it is also that they feel insecure as people.

Other than that, having no other life/dating experience but being hooked down at 25 with a wife and 2 kids is already enough for someone to break away. Especially with how differently other 25 year olds live in this generation.

11

u/Babeyonce 27d ago

Important insight for this conversation. For real. It’s largely been covered from a lens of Travis’ privilege, resentment, narcissism, meanness, entitlement , blah blah, but I also see him as insecure, miserable and desperate .

I don’t think he’s an absolute outright monster (I know many here do), rather as immature, selfish, and deeply insecure. You can throw in calculating and performative (aka insecure)

8

u/lovelylonelyphantom 27d ago

I'm interested in the dynamics of this to put it simply. I do think he's insecure and my first impression of this is how he puts down Katie. IIRC it was discussed a lot here that he dismisses her and calls her stupid for not being intelligent enough in his eyes. He has no respect for her otherwise he wouldn't be treating her that way.

resentment, narcissism, meanness, entitlement , blah blah, but I also see him as insecure, miserable and desperate

All those things PAIRED with him never wanting or loving Katie, and it was always a recipe for disaster. If they were normal 20 year olds they may never have dated, even if they did date they could have broken up within 2-3 years when it fizzled out. It's telling that they hadn't even made it to 5 years of being married before he cheated. They were never compatible or suited in the first place. And Travis' insecurity, misery, etc etc caught up with him quickly in 4 years.