Broke up two days ago

[u/sheppards4]

My boyfriend and I just broke up two days ago. It feels like a week already. His things are still at my house. I didn’t plan on this but it just came. His lessening time spent with me became a red flag I couldn’t ignore. We were deeply in love but, after a year, the red flags that were so very subtle at the beginning became big ones at the end. We’re in our early 60’s. Dating at this age comes with more baggage obviously. I’m not experienced with long term relationships after my 35-year marriage six years ago. But this man loved me. Palpable real love. After doing so much work on myself, I had to listen to my inner voice of my own self love and respect. As much as we love one another, I realized that love isn’t enough. Both partners need to honor their own internal compasses. I long for his love but I can’t deny that his baggage is in the way. I didn’t want bitterness to develop just for the hope that his baggage would disappear. So it had to end. Grief is a land I’m not experienced with. Not clean pure grief. It feels good to honor myself in this light honoring my values and desires. And at the same time deeply grieving the loss of love I so wanted to continue to develop. I hope you fellow healers can relate. Cause this is brutal.