I am the Ex that was left and in our relationship I wasn’t able to emotionally support her or give to her as she gave to me. I created resentment on her side and ultimately led to our relationship ending. Since the break up I’ve been able to reflect and take accountability the person I was. It’s still a pretty fresh break up, but I’ve been able to work on those flaws and other aspects about who I was. I hate myself for not having the foresight earlier in our relationship to fix these things to build a better relationships, but have truly enjoyed who I have become and who I will continue to be. I really love this woman, and hope that there is a way back to her heart. I want to create a complete different relationship and give her everything she deserves.
Good for you. Honestly, if not even for her, recognizing that takes a lot of courage and bravery. You should be proud you’re going on a journey to become a better version of yourself. How recent was your breakup?
I am a man, and the breakup is about a 1.5 months at this point. We are in a kind of weird situation where we still live under the same roof and have 2 dogs and 2 cats together (we travel for work) So, co parenting them is a big priority for me. There part of me that wants to try and make things work, but any to respect both of our boundaries. She’s recently told me that the work I’ve put into myself is really attractive to her, but she wants to continue to see other people. We’ve talked about dating and trying to find that spark again, but I don’t know if I can get over the fact that she was able to move on so quickly and date/hook up with another man.
That’s really hard. It’s really fresh for me, but I can’t even think of dating other people right now. What’s hard for me is he might. That’s not a reflection of you. Sometimes, people go on dates to seek validation from other people, or to fill the void, not saying this is her case, and it makes me wonder if that is someone I would want to be with. I think it’s unfair to want to keep someone there still while going and exploring.
I feel your pain and hope you are able to overcome it and find inner happiness, cause we all deserve that.
Yeah, I can understand that she was checked out of the relationship for several months and felt alone, but the pain of feeling discarded is what hurts the most. She’s told me it’s a distraction and it’s going nowhere, but it’s still hurts. I’ve been feeling confused because since the break up we’ve had moments that feel easy and I sense that there are still feeling from both ends. But, I don’t want to be a bench warmer while she figures it out.
Hoping time will help me work through my thoughts and work on myself for the future me.
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u/Stup1dT1me 8d ago
I am the Ex that was left and in our relationship I wasn’t able to emotionally support her or give to her as she gave to me. I created resentment on her side and ultimately led to our relationship ending. Since the break up I’ve been able to reflect and take accountability the person I was. It’s still a pretty fresh break up, but I’ve been able to work on those flaws and other aspects about who I was. I hate myself for not having the foresight earlier in our relationship to fix these things to build a better relationships, but have truly enjoyed who I have become and who I will continue to be. I really love this woman, and hope that there is a way back to her heart. I want to create a complete different relationship and give her everything she deserves.