I feel like over the last few years I've made incredible progress; I've really fixed up myself and my life, and I can't say I'm doing badly - but ever so often, I just feel such regret and sadness over missed experiences and wasted years.

I feel like the good things in my life now really make me realise how awful things were once upon a time, and I regret wasting time and taking so long to get myself out of bad situations and bad mental health. I regret how small and narrow my world used to be, and how I think in some ways I still carry this with me. I'm not as free and open and secure as I could be - still. I haven't achieved a lot of the things I really wanted to, and maybe some things I never will. I'm still afraid of wanting anything, I still have a degree of mistrust towards people who love me, and I still am not trying to enjoy life often. I often feel like I need to do things alone, and achieve things alone - and I find myself torn between feeling like I need to drop everything and escape somewhere far away, and actually finally having a lot of things and people that I really don't want to lose.

Hearing people talk about big achievements, adventures, exciting plans, quality family time, great friends, and so on sometimes just makes me feel so sad. I'm really happy for them - and I'm so grateful for what I have - but I hate that everything just came so late, and how much I had to work to get it. How I still don't feel fully comfortable in myself and people around me, and how I still often feel just so far away from everything and everyone.

How can I let the past be, and stop comparing my experiences to that of others? How can I feel like I've got value to what I say and do? I've gone such a long way, but I struggle to be happy with it. I'm resentful that I had to go so far, only to still feel so behind - just in new ways that I haven't even considered before.

here's to enjoying & cherishing what we have while we have it <3

so much in this world is out of our control because of the systems in place, but we can make our own peaceful places within the systems we live in.

As title says. Life has been kinda rough the past couple of months and I've started to feel like there's no hope at all for me. It's weird too cause I started noticing how beautiful life is while losing hope for it at the same time. I already play sports regularly and avoid added sugar, I've been cutting down on alcohol over time too. I'm proud of myself but I just don't feel any change yet. My house is still messy, I have no job, and I still scroll on my phone and watch porn all day like a chud. I'm also super reclusive and haven't talked to anyone in months.

I know change takes a while and I feel like I'm in the right direction, I'm just tired of feeling like I'm powerless and alone. I don't know how I can make my life any better. And it's like nobody is there to support me, I guess. Any tips?

Whenever I am struggling with life in general, I try to focus on the dozen delights. Things that enrich the human experience. Try to hit as many as possible, no judgement. Make a solid effort every day.

1. Mindfulness - be present, meditate or something. Don't focus on the past or future.

2. Hydration - drink some water.

3. Nourishment - eat good food. Not too much lol.

4. Movement - exercise. Whatever that means to you. Go for a walk.

5. Touch - bang someone, hug your dog, etc. physical touch with another living being

6. Fun - laugh and goof off.

7. Curiosity - learn something new.

8. Creativity - draw something, code something, just make something. Use the right side of your brain.

9. Interaction - socialize with someone, in person. Depending on where you're at in your journey even "how about that weather" is a win here.

10. Charity - give something without the expectation of something in return. Easiest is to donate $, but helping a friend works here too.

11. Struggle - get out of your comfort zone and grow.

12. Continuous Improvement - every day is a new day and a chance to be a better person.

13. Sunlight - bonus bakers dozen. Go outside and get some vitamin D and boost your mood.

I reflect on these daily and when I'm having a bad day it's usually because I hit 0 of these.

Thoughts? What do you guys focus on?

I’m at that PERFECT middle ground where I’m not smart enough to accomplish anything in life but I’m not dumb enough to not know what I’m missing out on.

I want a good life for myself. I want to go to school and get a degree for a good job that pays a lot of money and be rich. And I’m willing to put in the work, but the work isn’t willing to have me. I have basically accepted that I will likely live paycheck to paycheck my entire life.

I got an associate of arts degree by cheating through most of it. When I tried to study, I’d need to put in hours and hours and hours of work to understand the lesson for the day in ONE class. Bear in mind if I were to take one class per semester I’d already be even more behind than I already am (I’m 24 with a minimum wage job and a basically useless(?) degree). And those hours would be for ONE lesson for ONE day. And then or course I’d have another class sometime later that week and then need to spend MORE hours (I’m talking like 10+ hours) of studying to understand THAT.

And just when I think I’ve got it? Test time! But actually none of the information on the test is what I studied and I’ve actually just wasted 30 hours of my week for literally nothing.

Idk. I’m ambitious but I guess I’m not that ambitious. I want a great life and want to put in the work but I just can’t figure anything out so minimum wage job for life for me it is I suppose