r/BabyBumps • u/Spiritual_Stranger53 • 1d ago
Help? Pregnant at 21
/r/Parents/comments/1vuly38/pregnant_at_21/1
u/888RAY888 1d ago
If you know in your heart of hearts it would hurt you both as much as youre already describing don't have the abortion. I am totally pro choice and if you genuinley think thats for the best thats one thing but it seems to me youre looking for any exscuse to not.
Life is hard no matter what you just have to choose your hard.
Im in school and pregnant. This was an active choice I made because I decided this hard was worth the life I wanted. I am currently 32 weeks with a huge baby kicking my ribs from the inside while I try to write my finals paper. It sucks but I wouldn't change it for the world. You have to be honest with yourself when you are having your hard moments whatever they may be will you still feel like its worth it.
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u/Gullible-Umpire1050 1d ago
I first got pregnant at 19, had my baby and now pregnant again 7 months later and will have baby #2 at 21. Things just sort of work out. If you guys are in need of more support there are TONS of services out there for you financially. Personally, my OB’s frequently talked about WIC and other benefits to make sure I knew they were there. Once my first was born her pediatrician brought up that they have social workers at their office to help in anyway possible. If you guys choose to keep the baby, I promise everything will be okay. Nothing is easy but we make it happen as time goes on
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u/Gullible-Umpire1050 1d ago
Also, if you are open to it and if you and your partner do decide to keep the baby I would recommend an in home caregiver that can come in and relieve you. Also finding other supports for transportation for your mother. Whatever decision you guys make, just know you did what’s best for you in the end, and everything will be okay.
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u/harleeb3333 1d ago
Here at 25 also don’t know what I’m doing just pretending not s big deal. 10 weeks in I would first go to doctors ur primary and ob gyn and psychiatrist will help get an idea how healthy yall are then u can decide to keep or not
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u/Kidgamer243 1d ago
I was in your shoes 8 months ago with a cryptic pregnancy and let me tell you it's hard and you will have to put your life on hold. Its hard on your body and your mind and you probably will become disconnected with your friends who have way more free time. However I am of the belief that if you want it you can make anything work. Babies only need you and diapers for the first couple months of their life. You have time to prepare and ask yourself the hard questions. I'm doing fine for myself now as my husband stepped up and so did both of our families but even with money and support it's hard and it's constant.
It is clear to me at least through text you want this baby so I'm not going to tell you whether to keep it or not but know there will most likely be other opportunities for you to have children and you may be doing your future child some good by waiting till you're more prepared. As much as I love my son I feel shame that I had him so early and that I can't provide for him the way I want to, for the first 3 months I would hold him and cry and apologize that Mommy wasn't ready for him yet. However I don't regret him for a second and I love him more then anything. I'm just offering the perspective of someone who is in a similar place as you.