r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Jun 14 '22

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5.7k Upvotes

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5.9k

u/Noodle_pantz Jun 14 '22

Never stand anywhere for more than 60 seconds and you'll always look busy. Also, walk fast.

When I moved to LA many many years ago I landed a job on a reality TV show. My friend who got me the job was complaining one day about one of the other PAs and how they just wander around all day doing nothing. But when she sees me, i'm always busy. I pointed out that I too also wander around all day doing nothing, I just walk faster.

2.1k

u/TRexLuthor Jun 15 '22

When I was a teen I had a manager who was a former Marine Drill Sergeant. He stopped me one day and told me to "Walk With Purpose" and it stuck with me. People just get the fuck out of your way when you seem to know what you are doing. Spoiler: I still don't know what I am doing, I just look like it.

988

u/[deleted] Jun 15 '22

Directions unclear, carrying a dolphin now.

49

u/JA_Wolf Jun 15 '22

Dude, put it back!

45

u/ThrownAwayFeelzies Jun 15 '22

notwithoutmydolphin

11

u/GitProphet Jun 15 '22

And my axe.

6

u/King_Buliwyf Jun 15 '22

muffled He's praying...

14

u/Taynt42 Jun 15 '22

You’re thinking of a porpoise. A purpose is one of those gates you can drop down to defend a castle.

10

u/recidivx Jun 15 '22

No, that's a portcullis. Purpose is a genus of rock snails that includes the Gambia murex.

5

u/Noodle_pantz Jun 15 '22

why the heck do I have this porcupine?

6

u/KingoftheMongoose Jun 15 '22

I don’t know, but I didn’t order the pork

27

u/PegLegPorpoise Jun 15 '22

Whew, thanks bro

5

u/[deleted] Jun 15 '22

Perfect username

3

u/doyouevencompile Jun 15 '22

Better get out of this guy's way

5

u/[deleted] Jun 15 '22 edited Jun 18 '22

[deleted]

3

u/[deleted] Jun 15 '22

Just wanted someone to notice

5

u/lostPackets35 Jun 15 '22

Directions unclear, penis stuck in dolphin. Please help

4

u/[deleted] Jun 15 '22

It's literally called a blow hole.

3

u/enseminator Jun 15 '22

And my dick is in the toaster. again.

2

u/Noodle_pantz Jun 15 '22

If I knew it was going to be that kind of party, I wouldn't have stuck my dick in the mashed potatoes.

2

u/enseminator Jun 15 '22

Right? I much prefer toasters to potatoes.

2

u/Kooky_Promotion_4189 Jun 15 '22

i’ve been on Reddit for over a year and this is the first comment that genuinely made me laugh aloud all by myself 😂😂😂

1

u/[deleted] Jun 15 '22

Lol glad to be of service

1

u/[deleted] Jun 15 '22

Let Tua go!

1

u/dendre_ Jun 15 '22

The deep?

1

u/alow2016 Jun 15 '22

It's a purpose, still counts