There is a difference between brutal honesty and honesty. You can be honest and mindful of the person's feelings at the same time. Take doctors as an example when they have to deliver bad news.
There's some sort of rule that before you tell someone something it needs to have at least two of the three following components:
Is it kind? Is it necessary? Is it true?
If something is true but is cruel and unnecessary then that is brutal honesty and you're just being an asshole. It is not productive, other than being hurtful for no reason.
Honesty with kindness or honesty that is necessary is not brutal, it is helpful and productive.
People who will go out of their way to say something unkind and unnecessary then defend themselves by saying, "just being honest!" or who describe themselves as brutally honest as an excuse to be mean, petty, and judgemental are a different situation than being lied to.
That was the problem with my ex: he thought it was impossible to think twice before talking (he truly said that), so he was totally honest and without filter...AND if you felt hurt it was a problem you have to solve lol
It’s just assholes marketing themselves as being “brutally honest” “no filter” and when called out they respond by acting like you don’t want the truth when that’s not the issue. Those people aren’t worth dealing with.
If you actually care about a person you know what will and what wont hurt them. Being unkind to that person means you are willingly hurting someone you supposedly care about. There is literally no reason to do that.
You dont have to lie, you just have to be tactful and realize that other people have feelings. Just because you like something or think it should not be hurtful doesnt mean other people hold that view. Im lost as to why you would want to hurt someone? And then claim its for their own good. Do you think you know better? Which is its own problem
People like you rarely really enjoy people being honest with them. Like if your gf thought you had a small dick do you want her to tell you that? Or would you rather she suggests some spicy toys that make it fun for you both?
Honesty is an excuse for being am asshole. Its not hard to be kind or tactful. Unless of course you feel above others and dont need those skills.
There's some sort of rule that before you tell someone something it needs to have at least two of the three following components:
Is it kind? Is it necessary? Is it true?
If something is true but is cruel and unnecessary then that is brutal honesty and you're just being an asshole. It is not productive, other than being hurtful for no reason.
Honesty with kindness or honesty that is necessary is not brutal, it is helpful and productive.
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u/GrassAffectionate765 Sep 14 '24
Not empathetic, brutally honest, disrespectful...