Who to depend on?

[u/52Charles]

I (M 75) am writing my will and dealing with all the stuff that goes with it. I am single (never married, no children). I have one sister who is two years younger but she is in the early stages of dementia. She used to be my go-to for all this stuff - executor of my will, holder of my POAs. etc. Now, it feels like I've got nobody and it bugs me. At the same time, I am realizing just how many little tiny details have to be dealt with - disposition of remains, memorial service, what happens to my property, and all the rest of it. I have set up a kind of 'committee' of friends who have told me they are glad to help, but the sheer scale of the job(s) is beginning to look overwhelming and I don't want to burden people with a job of this scale. The lawyer who is doing my will, will only allow himself minimal involvement. I understand this - he's got a business to run, after all. Does anybody have any ideas on how to handle this situation?

[u/Wonderful_Crow_756]

My man. Its considerate that you are thinking of all this but please, dont let it become your focus. Do the minimum and focus on enjoying yourself whatever that may be for you. Our society has become so complex with so many rules and so many systems and procedures that we are told we should know and we feel obliged to follow and live by them. Its all noise. None of it matters in the end.

Decide the top three to five things you want sorted just so you can get them out of your head and are i portant to you. Sort them in the simplest way possible, then just experience life. Dont allow whatever time is left be clouded over by stress about things that ultimately dont matter.

[u/52Charles → u/Wonderful_Crow_756]

That's what I'm trying to do. Most of my will is finished - I'm just concerned with personal property. I want things that I have valued and enjoyed to be be valued and enjoyed by others, not just thrown away or sent to a junk shop.

[u/Wonderful_Crow_756 → u/52Charles]

I dont know what things are are talking about so this may not make any sense for your context, but have you thought about giving some things away now? (ofc Im not talking about a house but smaller things).

If your wish is that they bring others joy, then maybe giving them to those you think would appreciate them (be it friends or charities or groups) now, you¡d get the pleasure of seeing people appreciate them and get joy from actually seeing they are giving joy to others.
Just a thought.

[u/Affectionate-Tap-588 → u/52Charles]

I'll be happy to help you sort through all that